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| 201 Things the Worst KoNA Player Can't Do | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Aug 14 2009, 12:41 PM (4,596 Views) | |
| Spark Mandrill | Aug 14 2009, 12:41 PM Post #1 |
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This face will be lying in bed next to you.
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I ripped the idea off from "1001 Things The Wort Party in Eberron is Prohibited from doing." But all things considered, it can work here. Feel free to add your own 202+ things to this list. I know I plan to. In the meantime, sit back and enjoy! 1. You cannot play Sari Sumdac 2. Members of Guts ‘n Brawn can not merge together to form Devastator. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 3. Nor can Gutsman have a pair of wrecking balls for testicles 4. Ferham is not to don a leather kilt and “Vanquish the Horrible Night” by whipping Shademan or Hellbat Schilt to death 5. Even though Ferham in a leather kilt would be hot. 6. Also, Shademan and Hellbat Schilt can not hang out with The Grim Reaper, Frankenstein, Mummies, Medusa, or a Giant Bat. 7. You cannot play Sari Sumdac 8. Do not call Berkana “McDonald’s”, no matter how many she’s served 9. Do not call her 7-11 because her legs never close 10. Catgirl characters who do not have blue hair, white fur, nor answer to the name “Felicia” will be raped and eviscerated out of general principle. 11. As will characters named Sari Sumdac. 12. Catgirls named Felicia will be raped out of general principle anyway. 13. Whoever hung up that “No Stairway to Heaven” sign in Condorrock’s or Soundwave’s presence, take it down now before your character killed and possibly resurrected as undead cannon fodder 14. Slipping Quickman or Glowman some Jolt or Red Bull is asking for trouble. 15. Mattrex must never refer to himself in the third person, nor say “Me, Mattrex!” 16. Metal Shark Player is not a nice shark. 17. He is a mindless eating machine. 18. He does not want to change this image, nor himself. 19. People are food, not friends. 20. Anyone who plays the Jaws theme in MSP’s presence will have their DNA, and their lower portions devoured. 21. Anyone who attempts to lock Berkana alone in a room with Launch Octopus, Volt Kraken, and/or Tech Kraken will have their DNA erased forthwith 22. Or anyone in a room with Launch Octopus, Tech Kraken, and/or Volt Kraken 23. Mattrex does not sing “I love you, you love me,”. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 24. You are not Rick James, bitch 25. Pegasolta Éclair is 26. You are also not Sari Sumdac 27. Anyone who attempts to pay Swindle in p-chips or bolts will find themselves blacklisted 28. It is inappropriate to dress up as a ghost for Halloween in MMPU Oil Man’s presence 29. Alpha, Neo Mafia, Black Gauntlet, Hell’s Reploids, and Umbrella are also prohibited from burning big, lower-case T’s for “Time to leave!” on MMPU Oil Man’s lawn 30. Voltman does not live in a pocket-sized red and white ball in his downtime. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 31. Nor does he ride an electric wheelchair and act as the lead singer to “Lords of the Underworld” 32. Anyone who pairs Bob with a guy named, “George” will be devoured by Scylla Storm 33. Especially if he has lightning-based powers 34. Anyone who pairs Bob with Sari Sumdac will also be devoured 35. Mattrex was not one of the thirteen original Disciples of Cybertron who got banished for selling out to Unicron. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 36. Nor is Mattrex allowed to initiate The Unbinding, or activate a Solar Harvester 37. Anyone who offers Sparkman a cup of mango juice will be stabbed and electrocuted in the balls 38. Sparkman does not a have a cute spider for a daughter who follows him around for no reason 39. He squashed her with a newspaper 40. Geminiman is strictly prohibited from having a creepy romantic fixation on Sparkman, under pain of death. 41. Swindle has not left fifteen blue medals for you to shoot so you can obtain a free gun 42. Anyone who tries this will have their characters blown smithereens, and their salvageable weapons and parts auctioned off 43. On a related note, Swindle must never greet his customers by opening his robes and saying “Welcome…STRANGER!” 44. Avi is not into S&M. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 45. Dr. Sierra Avalon is not Turanga Leela. 46. …Okay, she is. But don’t call attention to it. 47. You can’t buy videos of Berkana for $9.99 48. They go for $19.99 49. Theta is not Frasier Crane. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 50. Nor does he does host a radio talk show. 51. Nor is Tau David Hyde Pierce 52. You cannot play Sari Sumdac 53. Colonel must refrain from yelling “Of course!” if someone mentions taking over the world 54. Nor is he permitted to say “This is delicious!” or “Yesh! YESH!” 55. No, he can’t sound like Raul Julia 56. …Alright, fine. He can. But the other rules still stand. 57. Neither Beta nor Blitzwing goosestep 58. Alpha andThe Decepticons have broken them of that habit, and will kill anyone who causes them to relapse again 59. Scalpel must not announce his presence by saying, “Hi everee-body!” 60. Nor must the room respond with, “Hi, Dr. Scalpel!” 61. To date, Buster Rod G. has not uttered “Kame-mahe-ha!”. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar that he has. 62. Nor does he suffer from chronic constipation…anymore 63. Nor is his power over 9000! 64. Slashman and Pluto are not allowed to smoke cigars 65. Say “Bub” 66. Or have amnesia. 67. You can’t play Wolverine! 68. Nor can you play Sari Sumdac. 69. Do not use “Captain” Quint’s name and likeness on a label of spiced rum 70. He is not cool enough to deserve that 71. Using Captain Napalmman’s name is perfectly acceptable and encouraged 72. When they’re together, Diveman and Elecman’s dialogue most consist of more than, “Huh, huh, huh, huh,” and “Heh-heh-heh-heh,” 73. Sol Cockataris is not permitted to use a dark crystal (or any other type of crystal) to drain the essence off of less fortunate characters to rejuvenate his youth 74. Nor can he use it to zombify lesser characters and make them his slaves 75. Pegasolta Éclair and Sol Cockataris are not to have an ego-based, homosexual relationship. 76. Besides, they have agreed to just be friends. 77. People are after Ashe’s booty, but not in the sense you’re think of 78. You cannot play Sari Sumdac 79. You cannot play Sari Sumdac 80. Glacier Cactank’s battlecry is not, “I’m-a Glacier Cactank! I’m-a gonna win!” It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 81. Do not ask Berkana to pose for a pin-up of her standing over a grate, holding down her skirt as a rush of air blows it up 82. Especially since there’s already plenty of pin-ups of her not even trying to hold her dress down 83. While Burstgirl is an obsessive-compulsive neat-freak, she is not interested in starring in her own USA series as a quirky, neurotic private investigator. 84. Nor is she interested in dating Helen Hunt in a lackluster romantic comedy (unfortunately). 85. The Four Fiends have not and will not appear in a Japanese, techno-pop video showing off their quirky sides, and will kill anyone who asks them to. 86. Especially since Sol Cockataris isn’t into, “LOVING GIRLS, LOVING GIRLS, otoko ni kyoumi wa NO NO,” 87. ESPECIALLY since we don’t want to see what’s under Infernal Salamandra’s robes 88. And on that note, Sigma can not change his class from dark knight to paladin by sojourning up a mountain on a quest of self-discovery 89. Nor is Theta under the control of Zemus. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 90. Alpha’s current status was not caused by Sigma using a crystal to reveal Alpha’s true form, so as to render him corporeal and vulnerable to his attacks. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 91. Nor did this happen on moon. 92. Nor did some wicked final boss music start playing in the background (unfortunately). 93. When cornered, neither Tau, Gate, Weil nor Isoc are to cryogenically freeze themselves and escape in a Big Boy Rocket 94. Nor are they to have a cat named, “Mr. Bigglesworth,” 95. I don’t care how many years at evil medical school they spent. 96. Berkana is not Rita Repulsa, nor can she have an army of guys with zippers on their costumes at her beckon call. 97. No, she doesn’t have Pudgy Pig either. 98. Split Mushroom killed it and painted a flowery meadow with its blood. 99. You cannot play Sari Sumdac 100. You are ill-advised to make Tomahawk Man cry by throwing a piece of trash in front of him 101. You can’t make Slashman, Neon Tiger, Pluto, or Slash Beast trip balls by throwing them catnip 102. Whoever keeps chanting “Craaab people. Craaaab people…” around Cancer Bubble and Bubble Crab must come forward 103. Ramjet is not to be shot with a Bizarro-Ray under any circumstance. 104. Anyone who calls Captain Napalmman “Captain Crunch” has signed their death warrant 105. Nothing of consequence will happen if you refer to “Captain” Quint by that moniker 106. It is wrong for Theta to use his power of suggestion to convince Zero or Harupia that they’re gay 107. No matter how hot Pi would think it would be 108. Nor can he use it to force Berkana and Fialar to make out 109. Especially since you don’t need Theta’s power to convince Berkana to do that 110. If Pandora and/or Berkana are ever captured, it is wrong to try them by making them wear a fake nose and weighing them against a duck 111. However, this is perfectly acceptable if Burstgirl, Leviathan, Dr. Sierra Avalon, The Gemini Spark Twins, Delta, or Scylla Storm are captured 112. And on that note, Berkana and Pandora can not turn people into newts 113. Or if they do, you can’t “get better” 114. Hermes and Doc Robot are not to be left alone with a full-length mirror 115. Ever 116. Especially if they’re in the same room 117. Under no circumstances is Avi to be fed baked beans 118. Cobra, I’m looking at you 119. Seriously, we don’t to see her re-enact the campfire baked beans scene from Blazing Saddles again 120. Berkana and Pandora are not hideous creatures under a pile of wigs and makeup that are out to turn the children of the world into mice 121. That’s Avi you’re thinking of 122. It is wrong for Infernal Salamandra to wear a cowboy hat, grow a thick red mustache and eyebrows, and hop around like the idiot he is, shouting “You dang-blasted, ornery varmint!” 123. Even if he already is 124. And that goes for Fefnir, too 125. Berkana is not out to have Princess Pride prick her finger on a spinning wheel because she’s STILL pissed that she wasn’t invited to her birthday party. It is wrong to Wreck-Gar otherwise. 126. Nor is she out to do this to Slur 127. No matter how much Slur wants you (and herself) to believe it 128. If her evil plans are being threatened, Berkana will not turn into a snarling black and purple dragon 129. ….Yet… 130. Zeta must release all his/her/its captured espers and magicite collection immediately 131. Nor can it say, “Nothing beats the music of hundreds of voices screaming in unison!” or “You all sound like chapters from a self-help booklet!” 132. Scylla Storm was not created by Willow when he used a magic wand on a troll incorrectly. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 133. Nor can you create more Scylla Storms this way 134. If anyone plays “Eye of the Tiger”, or yells “It’s clobbering time!” in Boxerman’s presence, so help me God… 135. We also have enough Dr. Light=Santa Clause jokes. Anyone who makes another will be met with deadly force. 136. Elpzio, Zero, Harupia, and Videoman are not allowed to go around Neo Arcadia, critiquing the fashion sense of other male characters and offer stylish alternatives to their wardrobe 137. And they can not be puppets controlled by Bubble Crab and Cancer Bubble 138. Hell’s Reploids are already Neo Arcadia’s most wanted outlaws. Placing bets on who can get their bounty raised higher is just overkill. 139. Get that fucking Sari Sumdac bio out of my face, Cyros. 140. You too, Indy 141. No, I don’t give a shit if she’s just a sidekick 142. Having PC Waveman, Bubble Crab, Cancer Bubble, Neptune, Aquagirl, or Bubbleman conduct wet t-shirt contests is wrong 143. Arousing, but wrong 144. Dick Gumshoe is not interested in figuring out who framed Roger Rabbit. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 145. While Cubit Foxtar has a secret move called “Flurry of Blows”, she will never perform it upon request and for 500 Z. 146. I must never refer to the Gemini Spark twins as The Olsen Twins 147. That’s just cold, even for me 148. No more breaking the fourth wall, or else I will apparently wind up married to Metabad in the fallout 149. Whoever’s playing “Under The Sea!” around Splashwoman and Leviathan, turn that shit off, or your life is forfeit 150. Botos is good for nothing and must be killed forthwith 151. Sharkman is prohibited from using Crorq to search for porn 152. Even if he plans on sharing it 153. There are no videos of Berkana and Fialar on the internet entitled “Two reploidchicks, one cup”. Make sure it stays that way. 154. Anyone who attempts to stage one or put one up will have the DNA of all their characters erased. 155. No, Cobra. We’re not going to tell you what that is. Google it already! 156. It is wrong to have PC Waveman participate in Neo Arcadian idol, just to piss off Sol Cockataris 157. No matter how uproariously hilarious it’d be. 158. Even though he specializes in raising wayward kids, Gamma must not fly around on an umbrella 159. Even though I’m laughing uncontrollably just thinking about it 160. Nor is he to sing “Just a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down” 161. Dynamoman’s catchphrases are not, “Don’t have a cow”, “I didn’t do it”, or “Aye Carumba!”, nor should they be. 162. If Flame Hyenard says “Burn to the ground!” one more time, Deathtanz Mantisk will personally and politely ask him to stop 163. As polite as a scythe to the throat can be 164. Yes, I know that’s his motto. Sucks to be him. 165. What part of ‘You cannot play Sari Sumdac!’ is confusing you?! 166. If a hot date turns down Tiesel Bonne’s dinner invitation, she is not to dine with the rest of his crew naked 167. If Avi, on the other hand, turns down Captain Napalmman’s dinner invitation, she is to dine with the rest of the forum naked. 168. Glowman must be put to death if he ever says the words “Dy-no-MITE!” or in a nasally voice, “Did I do that?” 169. Even though Ballade is technically homeless, it is inappropriate for him to say, “CHANGE!! You got CHANGE?!” 170. And on that note, Mu is not That Guy With The Glasses. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 171. Nor is Sol Cockataris the skeksis equivalent to the Nostaligia Critic 172. Napalmman, Mars, and Ares do not have to announce “It’s coming right for us!” before they blow a target to smithereens 173. Even if it really is coming right for them 174. Hermes will not ask you if you’ve seen John Connor 175. Calling Planetman Captain Planet is just tacky 176. As is calling Neon Tiger Tony 177. While judges, and harbingers of doom, the Eight Gentle Judges can not have half a dozen cartoonish weasels as sidekicks 178. Nor will the Eight Gentle Judges melt if exposed to dip 179. Delta and Iota are not River Tam. 180. Nor will they go bonkers and kill everybody if you say “Miranda”. You are ill-advised to try such a thing 181. Red Alert is not the cast of Firefly. 182. Argoyle and Urgoyle will meet an untimely and zombie-related demise if they start singing “Happy, happy! Joy, joy!” 183. Childre Inarabbita can not be dispatched with a “Holy Hand Grenade”. Don’t even try. 184. Repliforce is not “Team America! Fuck yeah!” 185. Zeta should not feel the need to ask “Why so serious?” 186. There will be drastic consequences if Noble Mandrango terrorizes Rick Moranis screaming, “FEEEED ME, Seymour!” 187. Spark Mandrill is not Ralph Wiggum 188. Ralph Wiggum is smarter than he is 189. Do not to play a tuba whenever Hardman’s walking around 190. …While he’s in an earshot 191. Mattrex should not feel obligated to say “Yessss…” at the end of every sentence 192. Whoever put GBD in that orange parka, please step forward and get it off of him 193. Or at least what’s left of him 194. Sigma is not a light saber-toting Charlie Brown. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 195. Nor is Velguarder/Savageman Snoopy 196. Neither Slur nor Weil can vanquish Berkana by dropping a house on top of her 197. Nor will Berkana threaten Slur and Gospel by saying, “I’ll get you, my pretty! And your little dog too!” 198. Nor will splashing Berkana with water cause her to melt 199. She’ll simply think she’s in another one of PC Waveman’s wet t-shirt contests 200. Dr. Weil and Isoc are not to spend their free time up in a balcony heckling the Muppets. 201. For the last goddamn time, you cannot play Sari Sumdac! 202. Despite his heritage, Hunter Chameleon can not sit on top of an impenetrable castle and fling cows from catapults at his enemies 203. That’s just cheap. 204. He also can’t taunt his foes with, “Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you!” 205. If Dynamoman doesn’t get his way, he is not to yell “Screw you guys, I’m going home!” 206. General is not to approach a group of random kids with day-to-day advice on what to do if your house is on fire, if someone’s on thin ice, or if there’s a downed powerline. 207. Nor is he to finish his speech with “…And knowing his half the battle!” 208. They will think that he wants to give them a BODY MASSAGE! 209. Fireman will not take kindly to anyone using the top of his head to roast marshmallows or hot dogs 210. First person to play “One Wigned Angel” around Drakelor will personally answer to Deathtanz Mantisk 211. Or around any of Cobra’s characters 212. Isoc does not keep a roll of paper towels or toilet paper in the back of head. 213. …Anymore 214. If Storm Owl says “NO BATTERIES!” even once, he will find himself, bound and gagged in front of the Eight Gentle Judges’ doorstep with a note proclaiming him as a criminal and a child molester. You’ve been warned. 215. Hinoken is not a pyromaniac Sideshow Bob. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 216. Calling the Gemini Spark Twins the “Village Bikes” is just plain crude 217. Hosting a round-table discussion featuring Scylla Storm, Blitzwing, and Beta can only lead to disaster 218. Even if they host a round-table discussion by themselves. 219. No playing “Boy or Girl?” with Zero, Zeta or Harupia 220. …While they’re in an earshot 221. Anyone who gives Rush a Scooby-Doo ascent should not be surprised to find a bloody scythe protruding from their chest. 223. Repliforce is not out to kill a “Pesky moose and sqvuirell,”. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 224. It is wrong for Soundwave to dispatch Laserbeak to watch The Maverick Huntresses, Burstgirl, or Berkana in the shower 225. …Without notifying the rest of the Decepticons first 226. Eggs are not poison to Stoneman, and you are ill-advised to use them as such 227. And if you do not get that reference, you suck. 228. Zeta and Thornacus cannot plan a caper revolving around "boners". 229. And if someone happens to chortle their boners, they should not be outraged and declare, "I'll show them how many boners Zeta/Thornacus can make!" 230. Flameman is not a guard to Agrabah 231. Nor does he menace Aladdin on his downtime 232. And it is wrong to point out that Hyleg Ourobuckle is Jafar in snake form 233. Even if he sounds exactly like him. 234. And no, he can’t have a parrot voiced by Gilbert Godfrey as his scheming companion 235. Cobra Omega (the character) is NOT the Cobra Commander. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 236. Armarando is also not Destro, and none of Cobra's female characters are the Baroness. 237. Especially not Rubalina 238. Onyxor is not Solid Snake. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 239. No calling Adamantius 'Big Drakelor' or Drakelor 'Tiny Adamantius'. 240. ...While they're in a earshot 241. Nu will not invet a 'What-if-machine'. 242. Especially since Kaiser and Drakelor would use it for their perverted fantasies about nearly every female character. 243. Thornacus is not Thorn or Zorn from FF9, it is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 244. Thornacus is also not the Joker. Especially not the Dark Knight one. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 245. It is perfectly normal if you cannot spell any of Cobra's character names properly... 246. Except for Nu and Xi, that would just be sad. 247. Elpizo is strictly prohibited from having a crush on General. 248. General would just crush him anyways. 249. It is wrong to compare Shadowman and Naruto and claim that the latter is better, anyone who does so will be impaled by a shuriken. 250. Dark Star does not have Alzheimer's disease 251. He's just senile, but it is wrong to say that to his face. 252. Say it behind his back instead. 253. It is oh-so-very wrong to pair up Demon Gemini and Angel Gemini as a couple and any offenders of this will be sodomized by a Gemini Laser. 254. If Blizzard Wolffang, Fenri Lunaedge, Rush, Treble, Velguarder or any other dog-like reploid starts singing a rap song aboard a boat that is reminiscent of "It's Party Time" then HEADS. WILL. ROLL. 255. Or they'll get neutered and put to sleep, either one works. 256. Mimicking another lister's jokes or style will get you blown up by Napalm Man. 257. That means you, Cobra. 258. Napalm Man is NOT Mark "Barney" Greenway in armor. Nice try, though. 259. Saying "Party on, Condorrock" would get you killed by a horde of zombies. 260. No, seriously, I would know. 261. On the other hand, spouting out the lyrics to "St. Anger" would get you double-teamed by Vulturon Condorrock and Ktulu Lightning. 262. Ktulu is not a rapist. 263. Cobra is, however. GET AWAY FROM ELEC U PERV. 264. Gravity Man, Ground Man and Jazz in the same room = gangsta rapper party. 265. With blackjack. 266. And hookers, in the form of Berkana and Crystal Girl. 268. Indy and Star Man in the same room would cause the universe to explode. 269. Beta wasn't inspired by Blitzwing at all, actually. 270. And claiming he was a ripoff will result in you lasered and bombed into oblivion. 271. Good thing no one caught there was no #267... <<; 267. Infinity Mijinion will not form his own sports team for you. 272: LaserMan and Geminiman are not allowed to do this. 273: If you're going to egg Avi's house, let Spark go with you. 274: Or he'll MAKE YOU. 275: He's already on his way there, you might as well take him with you 276: After you befriend KnightMan, don't take him to a Renaissance fair. Or he'll impale you. 277: Mention the words "Koga" and "Pokemon" around ShadowMan, and it'll be a smokebomb down your throat. 278. It's not proper to make Boomer Kuwanger go to war... Unless it's a nuclear war. 279: If it's any other war, he may be screwed. 280: Make the mistake of showing Hinoken your bottle of Russian vodka, and you'll be looking for cheap houses on the internet. 281: Mars is not gonna stick anti-demon stickers on anyone, especially Demon Gemini (Sailor Moon reference). 282: Carry wallets that return themselves to their owners, just incase you're around Spike. 283. If you are caught saying, "SnooPING AS usual, I see?" to Lex Loathe, you will be penalized with a $500 fine and ten years in prison with Guts Man. 284. ...and if that happens, don't drop the soap. 285. ...because he hates it when people do that, since he always feels obligated to pick it up even though you're the one who dropped the damn thing, and on top of that it's almost impossible to get a good grip on it while you lift it off the floor. 286. By my decree, 'wildebeest' henceforth is spelled W-I-L-D-E-B-E-A-S-T. 287. Elmeg Mete is not afraid of crocodiles, nor does he spend all his time chasing a flying prepubescent boy who never grows up. 288. Anyone who asks Ninetales if he knows Flamethrower or Fire Spin will be given 500 hours of mandatory community service. 290. ...which will involve paying a visit to Abuelo, listening to his stories and pretending you're interested. 291. Under no circumstances may Maggey or Sandy ask you to kiss their grits. 292: PlantMan's helmet isn't made out of opium leaves, so don't ask him that. 293-299.: I know how to count. Don't correct me. 300. Bombman is not Mr. T 301. Even if he thinks he is 302. You are not being funny if you call Magma or Tempest Dragoon "Puff". Just stupid 303. Even though I’m planning on having Diveman call them that 304. Somebody better have a good explanation as to why there’s a Sari Sumdac bio in my inbox 305. Dallas does not run an establishment called “Fried Green Tomatoes” It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 306. You can’t get high by licking Toadman 307. That’s just creepy 308. Toadman must never say “It’s not easy being green!” 309. His habit of saying “Kero!” is already unbearable beyond numbers 310. He also does not have a romantic interest in an overly-assertive pig with blonde hair and blue eyes 311-321. Ferham is not to be left alone with ANY of Cobra’s characters!! 322. Toadman cannot pick up chicks by asking them to kiss him, so as to turn him into a prince 323. ESPECIALLY not Princess Pride 324. That is stupid, and you are stupid for thinking of that 325. No, I don’t care if you managed to trick Slur with that one 326. Even though she is a chick in heavy armor with a beam cannon for a hand, Xi is not allowed to be an intergalactic bounty hunter charged with hunting down green, gelatinous, intergalactic parasites known as “Metroids” 327. Nor is she to be menaced by a big brain in a jar, or an intergalactic dragon 328. She will not strip down to her undies or a skin-tight bodysuit if you finish an RP in three hours 329. Believe me, I’ve tried 330. Nor will she strip down to her undies if you type in JUSTIN BAILEY ------ ------ 331. I’ve tried that one, too 332. Infernal Salamandra must never amass an army of evil turtles, mushrooms, and other goofy bad buys and kidnap Princess Pride to be his wife 333. Nor can Split Mushroom appear in her place to announce, “The princess is in another castle” 334. For they will be his last words 335. Avi and I are not to go skipping off into the sunset...An accomplished love affair 336. We are to go skipping off to her place, or the nearest hotel room 337. So as to have a romantic candlelit dinner while her favorite musicians play in the background, and then turn the children of the world into mice 338. She is NOT going whip me, or fart in my face while I shout, “Huzzah!”!! 339. You are a sick man, Cobra. Get help 340. No, that’s not how babies are made. Whoever told you that was lying. 341. Even if it was probably me 342. Look, when I said Toadman wasn’t dating Ms. Piggy, I didn’t mean that you should try to hook them up. Now break it off before it’s too late. 343. Introducing a nest of mudkips in any of Cobra's characters' privies is wrong 344. Funny, but wrong 345. In no way will Dark Star demand that the other characters "come into his ass" I mean come on...that's just absurd, really now. Who came up with that anyways?Oh wait... 346. Denying Cobra his Mudkips will result in a girly slap from the man himself, believe me. 347. Do not give Slash Man or Slash Beast a guitar and a top hat. 348. Your ears will regret it, trust me. 349. I ate #293-299. 350. And they were delicious. 351: Saturn the Stardroid DOES NOT have a Death Star. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 352: Don't refer to Mattrex as "RUUUUN! IT'S GODZILLAAAAAAA!" or he just might be Godzilla for that moment. 353: Ramjet is a very pretty woman, and you may refer to her as so. 354: Don't make Ballade play "Even Flow" whenever he's out on the streets. 355: If you have a restaurant, spray anti-Starjin repellent on the walls and windows. 356: Don't talk about X-Men in front of ANY Robot Masters. EVER. 357: MegaMan is NOT Sonic, and Bass is NOT Shadow. Don't ever refer to them as hedgehogs. EVER. 358. None of Cobra's female characters are strippers. 359. No matter how dissapointing that may be to everyone including me. 360. However, Drakelor secretly is, but no one likes him, and his ridiculously high price of 200,000 zenny. 361. Even though he'll only charge ladies 22 zenny. 362. Craothe is not part of Orginaztion XIII, she just wears robes similar to theirs. 363. If Storm Owl is caught saying 'ASS BATTERIES', Adamantius and Death ex Machina will clip his wings, and make him eat a missle. 364. I don't care if Metabad came up with 'ASS BATTERIES', it ain't happening while I'm around or ever. 365. If Cobra is blamed for something, there must be a logical explainaition or he will liable to smack a bitch. 367. I ate 366, it tasted like Metabad. 368. The bitch mentioned in 365 will not be a female dog or Avi. 369. As dissapointing as that may be to some people 370. Anyone caught feeding Saturn the Stardroid 'Fruit Loops' or any other cereal with rings in them will be handfed Baked Beans and Prunes by Cobra. 371. There are several perfectly logical reasons why Cobra is officially held responsible for everything and anything. Suck it up. 372. Botos is not Cartman 373. Cartman’s actually more useful than he is 374. Sparkman is not Black Mage 375. Even though his favorite problem-solving techniques are “Stabbity-Death” and unleashing a powerful energy blast 376. Alpha’s current status was not caused by Sigma cutting the One Ring of Power off his hand. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 377. Nor should Alpha’s forces try to retrieve it for him 378. The Ruins of the Eurasia Colony are not to be referred to as "Mordor", and Alpha's hideout is not "Bara-Dur" 379. Bara-Dur's actually two blocks down from Alpha's hideout 380. Dr. Weil can not command a palantir 381. And he can not take up residence in Isengard 382. Nor is Megaman Frodo Baggins 383. No matter how short he is 384. Berkana is not Galadriel 385. And if she ever does give anyone Elven rope, it will only be to Dr. Weil and Slur 386. So as to hang themselves 387. Woodman does not and can not command an army of Treants. 388. Zero is not Aragorn 389. Nor Legolas 390. First person to write a Zero/Aragorn/Legolas fanfic will meet a grisly, Mantisk-related end. 391. Elec, Eriduro, and Crystalgirl, I’m looking at you three 392. Spark Mandrill and Soldier Stonekong are not out to kidnap Pauline and carry her up a construction site. It is wrong to tell Mandrill otherwise 393. And if either of them are captured, you can’t free them by breaking a barrel with a big DK on it 394. No matter how true Mandrill thinks that is 395. Nor should Wheel Gator feel compelled to amass army of leather slave crocodiles and steal their banana horde 396. Rule #370 is null and void if the person in question is Avi 397. Nice try, Cobra 398. Vulgus Slums is not to be called a “Wretched hive of scum and villainy,” 399. Even though it is 400. Red is not to drive a Millennium Falcon 401. Nor is Ninetails to be referred to as “An alcoholic Obi-Wan” 402. Even if it’s so very, very true 403. Do not refer to anyone at Red Alert or any other bounty hunter as Boba Fett, unless that’s their actual name 404. No one named Boba Fett may join Red Alert or act as a bounty hunter 405. That's right. I didn't do that stupid "Rule not found" joke for #404. Deal with it. 406. Do NOT let Scalpel take up gynecology 407. Or proctology 408. For any number of reasons 409. Besides, everyone knows that Elecman is the resident gynecologist 410. By the way, Dr. Avalon and Princess Pride are due in for another check-up. 411. Do not go to Scalpel for a cheap alternative for plastic surgery 412. No matter how good he says he is at it 413. You will only live to regret it 414. Having Infernal Salamandra set Elpzio or Videoman on fire and calling them “Flamers” is just painful 415. If you value your life, do not call Captain Napalmman “Captain N” 416. Infernal Salamandra is not the drill sergeant from Full Metal Jacket 417. Even if he is 418. Yes, you read that right 419. If Elecman ever decides to pay Dr. Light a visit, HE IS NOT TO TELL HIM TO PISS OFF AND GO REJOIN DR. WILY 420. That’s not a death wish, that’s a death boner 421. No Zeta and Thornacus, we’re not chortling your boners. 422. This time. 423. Terra’s pants must stay on if he ever unleashes his “Dark Moon” 424. No, you don’t have one, either 425. I, on the other hand, have one. But only Avi has seen it 426: Anyone who goes up to ProtoMan and starts saying "Thank you, thank you very much" in an Elvis Presley manner will be shot by the Elvis-haired robot himself. 427: If it ain't broke, GutsMan's ass will break it. 428: And yes, he will say DA-NAAAAAH when it gets broken. 429: KnightMan is your friend, yes, but he does NOT want to meet your pet dragonfly. Especially since it had a bath in nuclear waste. 430: Vile won't be looking for Han Solo in the middle of the Mos Eisley Cantina. Seriously. You can ask him. 432: Saturn brutally slaughtered 431... It got in his way 433. Deathtanz Mantisk will personally eviscerate anyone who skips any more rule numbers just for the sake of it. 434. Yes, he knows it's supposed to be "Deathtanz" Mantisk and not "Deathanz" Mantisk. 435. He may be Neo Arcadia's most notorious serial killer, but he's a terrible speller, and quite sensitive about it. Anyone who brings it up will be mutilated beyond recognition. 436. Stop chuckling at Pegasolta Eclair's name. 437. It's not his fault those wretched, simple-minded snaileaters named him after a filthy, disgusting pastry. 438: Mu will not fuse Personas for you. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 439: Duckbill Mole is not an Austrailian sterotype, even though he has an Austrailian accent. 440: Do not make a trail of shiny objects leading into the men's room of Hell's Reploid's base, unless you want to see Colonel stick his rapier up Elecman's ass. 441: If you do want to see that, disregard rule 440. 442: Chicks will not be impressed if you babysit Split Mushroom, Aquagirl, and Gigavolt Man-o-War at the same time. The "cute father" approach is overdone. 443: Elecman has to give Aquagirl, Gigavolt Man-o-War, and Split Mushroom back to their respective owners right now. 444. Xi and Garnetia will not make out with each other, whoever keeps asking, please stop or be castrated by Craothe. 445. Cobra and Drakelor will not have a final epic battle inside a crater where Drakelor was gathering power. 446. Cobra will also not carry a ridiculously huge sword, and Drakelor will not be shirtless or have a 50ft. long katana. It is wrong to tell anyone otherwise. 447. Of course, Drakelor does sell pictures of himself shirtless to ladies for the low price of 1900 zenny. 448. Whoever keeps paying Drakelor to advertise here, please stop. Drakelor isn't the only character who wants to advertise y'know. 449. Drakelor cannot summon meteors to go towards the planet. He's too weak to do that, and it is wrong to tell anyone otherwise. 450. There is never enough Dakka. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 451. Leroy will not go into battle shouting 'LEROOOOOOOY JENKIIIIIINS!'. It is very wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise, and anyone caught telling Wreck-Gar that will be personally be stabbed by Leroy. 452. Never call Dallas, sweetheart... ever. 453. Never make Indy wear pants... 454. Or hot pants. 455. Porkler is not Porky Pig. He will not burst out of a drum and say "That's all folks!" 456. Elecman is the new celing cat... 457. Spike will always flip the skirt of another female. A man in a dress is another story. 458. #437 is null and void because "éclair" is the French word for lightning. 459. Any pastry-related nicknames will have you electrocuted, however. 460. If you ever see Armarando wearing a maid's outfit, stab out your eyes, it'll make you feel better. 461. Dammit Armarando, stop wearing that dress and wig!! Did Drakelor mess up your mind that badly?! 462. The only reason Porkler would burst out of a drum, would be to shoot his bounty. 463. Xi's boobs are not fake, whoever keeps saying that is going to be killed by Nu. 464. While we're on that subject. Craothe's aren't fake either. 465. Now that, that's out of my system. Kaiser is not Bandit Keith. 466. Ok, who's the one telling Cobra to make a Sari Sumdac bio? I thought we went over this already! 467. Gemini Machina will never say 'Hurt me more Snake!' when he is using his Assassin face. 468. Kaiser will always flirt with female characters. ALWAYS. 469. Even if he isn't flirting, he's flirting. 470. MMPU Oilman will not say 'I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!', if Hyleg or any other snake-like character is on the same plane as him. 471. Cobra is not secretly a snake. It is wrong to tell Frost Man otherwise. 472: Never call FlameMan "Allah." 473: If you're going to, do it when he's out of earshot. 474: Don't use HeatMan as your personal cigarette lighter. He prefers lighting joints. 475. No more “my character will always do this,” rules 476. Seriously, this is a list of what characters can’t do, not what they will always do! You’re missing the point entirely! 477. The only exception is “Deathtanz Mantisk will always kill anyone who does this,” rule. For he is my enforcer of this list. Now moving on. 478. Only I may make Sari Sumdac bio jokes, for I hate her with a fiery passion of a million Infernal Salamandras 479. But I appreciate the effort 480. Wreck-Gar is not to be left alone with Spark Mandrill and/or Bombman 481. Who knows what kind of intellectual damage they can do to each other 482. It is wrong to tell Spark Mandrill that the tooth fairy is “Fairy” Leviathan. It is also wrong to tell Wreck-Gar this as well 483. She was willing to indulge Mandrill at first, but now she’s sick of him leaving heaps of bloody, broken teeth in her room. 484. Besides, he’s burning a hole in her wallet 485. Garnetia is not a cheap 200 zenny whore. It is wrong to tell Drakelor or Kaiser otherwise. 486. Cobra is not evil for wearing Red and Black, and having an empire, those are both cliches, and anyone who thinks he is evil based on these cliches will have their vocal cords torn out by Drakelor. 487. You will never see Thornacus without his mask. 488. Because seeing him without his mask is a death boner waiting to happen. 489. ANYONE is more useful than Botos. 490. Even the Green Biker Dude. 491. As smelly as he may be. 492. Botos doesn't care about anyone or anything, not even himself, which is why he's so fat. 493. It is wrong to think that Botos and GBD would get along just fine, Botos doesn't get along with anyone. 494. If the next rule has Botos in it I am going to snap. 495. No one likes Botos, not even Metabad. 496. You still can not play Sari Sumdac! 497. Don't put Botos, GBD, and Drakelor in the same room. 498. I don't care if you're having a contest to see who's the most annoying, just don't! 499. Besides, we already know who would win. 500. No don't put Botos and Porkler in the same room either to see which one is fatter. 501. Botos would win that too. 502. Death ex Machina does not have Crotch Cannons that face downwards! Those are merely things added for decoration. 503. Cosmo Man will not turn into a gold fish, and he doesn't have a wife called Wanda. 504. Don't ever, EVER make fanfics about Botos pairings. Or I swear by what ever God you hold dear that something VERY unpleasant will happen to you! 505. You have been warned... 506. It is wrong to tell Elpizo that he is straight, or to force him into being straight. 507. Elpizo does not have a millenium eye underneath his helmet which he uses to play card games. 508. Not yet, at least... 509. None of Cobra's characters will say 'What a horrible night to have a curse'. 510. Not yet at least. 511. Though if you do choose to have a character say that. Thank Cobra for bringing up the reference. 512. Porkler will never say 'OM NOM NOM NOM!' or 'Sandvich'. 513. Porkler is not Russian despite favoring Vodka. 514. Shade Man or Hellbat Schilt will never utter 'What is a man?! A miserable little pile of secrets!!' 515. Porkler is not Pudgey Pig. 516. Drakelor does not know how to use Photoshop. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 517: You are NEVER allowed to make DesertMan sing "Mr. Sandman." 518: Don't threaten to make PlantMan into a salad with sliced turkey. Because that's just sick and un-vegetarian. 519: Ham is kosher, so use that. 520: Porkler, we're looking at you. 521. Porkler is not Hamtom J. Pig, either. 522. Dallas is not a man, seriouly. 523. Chopper will never become a pompus gentlman. 524. Pluto and Tango do not like the Meow Mix Jingle, but will sing it! 525: Don't put Demon and Angel Gemini together on the Jerry Springer Show, if you value your lives. EVER. 526: Same goes for Terra and Saturn. 527: Don't mention the Village People near GutsMan, FakeMan, and TomahawkMan. 528. Spike is not Scrappy Doo. 529. Nor does he have a father named Sparkplug. 530. Or a son. 531. Ride Boarski did not star in Wild Hogs. 532. Unless it is Craothe's birthday, or he's killing his bounty. Porkler will never hide in a cake 533. Even if he gets to eat it afterwards. 534. Kaiser will never shout 'I'm too sexy to die!' 535. That's Drakelor's job. 536. Don't ask any one of Cobra's characters who come from Zyroni if 'The Devil may Cry'. 537. You'll be stuck there for hours hearing about the various demons Cobra (the character) encountered. 538. Anything involving big red buttons is usually never good. 539. Unless 'big red button' is slang for-- 540. 539 was not finished due to the amount of censoring that went on beyond that point. 541. Cobra, get your mind out of the gutter and get some help. 542. You must not try to disable Ride Boarski or Turboman by sticking a banana in their tailpipes 543. In EITHER of their tailpipes 544. Nor can vanquish either one of them with a barrage of turtle shells (red or green), spiny shells, or fake item boxes 545. Lightning bolts are acceptable. But you can’t use them to shrink them 546. If Tenguman ever gains mental or psychic powers for ANY reason, he dies on the spot. With pain. The end. 547. Shademan and Hellbat Schilt are to stop pestering Morrigan Aensland 548. She’s already on a short fuse from all the advances Elecman made on her, and will kick the shit out of anyone who so much as touches her 549. Same goes for Lilith Aensland 550. She’s not even legal, man! Just ask Elecman. 551. Calling Skullman “Skeletor” isn’t original, nor a wise move on your part 552. Neither is calling him “Boner” 553. You’re just going to get Zeta and Thornacus worked up again 554. And Skullman is not to be subjected to the Slowest Fall in the History of Slowest Falls. 555. Magicman will not take kindly to anyone who switches out his magic cards with a deck of cards with naked chicks on them 556. …In battle, anyway 557. Under no circumstances is anyone to offer Magicman a Black Lotus 558. Anyone who challenges Magicman to game of Triple Triad will find themselves ripped to shreds 559. And on a similar note, if I see any of Cobra’s characters summon a GF, so help me… 560. No, naming them “Asspickle”, “Ms. Bukakke”, or “Firepubes” will not save you 561. And no, Avi is not your GF 562. Even if she told you otherwise 563. Botos cannot be married to an attractive red head, have a talking dog as a companion, nor father a megalomaniacal baby with a football-shaped head 564. No attractive redheads in the world would want to marry him, let alone sleep with him 565. And Rush wants absolutely nothing to do with him 566. Seriously, why hasn’t anyone killed Botos yet?? 567. Oliver and Aquagirl cannot claim to be Elecman’s bastard child 568. Even if it’s 50-50 likely 569. Elecman is to be racked if he ever says the words, “Allllrigght!” or “Giggity-giggity-giggity-gooo!” 570. Dynamoman is not to menace anyone named Mr. Wilson 571. Nor can he have a stuffed tiger named, “Hobbes” 572. Axl does not have a hip, ‘80s techno theme playing in the background wherever he goes. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 573: If you call any fire-based Robot Masters/Reploids "Axel", you are not allowed to run while they pour propane on you and light you on fire. 574: They may light you on fire in whichever way they would like to. 575: You shall NOT, under any circumstances, scream "THE REGULARS ARE COMING!" while riding CentaurMan into town. 576: CentaurMan is also NOT a $1 pony ride. 577: He's a $5 pony ride, get it right! 578. Mutt does not do tricks. 579. He does not repsond to "Here boy!" 580. Bubbleman does not act like how that song make shim out to be. 581. Even though Botos is a failure, he MIGHT be better than Sari Sumdac, although only Spark would truly know the true answer to this. 582. That said, Botos is only allowed to live as long as he gets the shit pummeled out of him. 583. THEN he can die. 584. Scarface is NOT Jason Vorhees. 585. Whoever gave Tiesel a compass that doesn’t north must come forward 586. Seriously, you’re just going to get the poor guy lost 587. It is inappropriate to put a “We break for no one!” a bumper sticker on the back of the Bonne’s ship 588. Even if they don’t 589. Alpha cannot burrow into the center of the Earth and re-emerge in the year 1999 to cause the apocalypse 590. The year 1999 is long gone. He’s just going to look stupid. 591. Nor can Berkana use a Mammon Machine to draw power off of him to make herself immortal and all-powerful 592. Nor can she take up residence in a floating black Christmas tree, or in an ocean palace. 593. None of Cobra’s characters are Magus. It is wrong to tell him otherwise. 594. Adamantius, Onyxor, and Garnetia are not Ozzie, Slash, and Flea. It is wrong to tell them otherwise. 595. Iota, take that leash off of Crashman immediately 596. I don’t care if he’s your pet. You’re giving Cobra unsavory ideas 597. No, you can’t feed him puppychow from a dog dish anymore. Not while Cobra’s still active. Don’t even try 598. Whacking him with a rolled up newspaper is still acceptable. 599. We do that to Cobra all the time. Pets these days… 600. Guess what? You STILL can't play Sari Sumdac! 601. MMPU Oilman, Gravityman and Bass are not to have “Bling” 602. Anyone who refers to Diveman as “Blue October” will be met with a barrage of dive missiles 603. Anyone who shouts “Who let the dogs out?!” while Fenri Lunaedge or Blizzard Wolfang are attacking will be torn limb from limb 604. If Tau, Isoc or Weil ever enter a room saying “Good news, everyone!” or “Good news keeps coming!”, there will be plenty of bad news for them. In the form of an angry Deathtanz Mantisk 605. Diveman and Hardman are not to be referred to as “Bender” 606. Bender is actually more sober than they are, so they would find such a comment objectionable 607. Lex Loathe is not to tap his fingers and say, “Exxxcellent…” if something his goes his way 608. Also, Spade Magnets is not to be referred to as “Smithers” 609. As comparing Spade Magnets to Smithers will only lead us in any number of wrong directions 610. Spike likes women and anyone who likes him, but he will not hump your leg. 611. Nor can you torch his left eye. 612. Slashman is not a furry. 613. Shademan is not Mr. Burns. He does not own a Power Plant. 614. Even though it's a ~SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN FACT LOL~ that trees do not grow on mountains - especially not in a universe where we have robots who stop time and literally give people nightmares - you are, under no circumstance, to blindly deny the fact that they do indeed grow on the Maori Mountains. You'll only end up looking ridiculous. 615. Likewise, even though ~EVERYBODY KNOWS~ that there are never bars in bustling, lively cities... suck it up and accept the fact that Yashichi Valley is FILLED with 'em. 616. One shall not [do/say this] around [your character] or else [inset grisly fate of your choice here.] 617. Also, [character] shall not [insert pop culture reference loosely pertaining to the character in question here]. 618. ...or else [insert idle threat from your character here]. 619. Don't leave Cobra alone with the newspapers. 620. Otherwise he'll eat them we will have to find other things to whack him with. 621. Cobra is not allowed to refer to himself in third person. 622. Even though he constantly does it on this list. 623. Don't leave Adamantius and Death ex Machina in the same room. 624. Unless Botos is there too. 625. Shademan and Hellbat Schilt are not Batman 626. Nor can they breathe in space. 627. Fenri Lunaedge is not Dodger from “Oliver and Company”. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 628. He is strictly forbidden from singing “Why Should I Worry? Why Should I Care?” while taunting Oliver 629. He may have “Street Savoir Faire”, but there’s no need to flaunt it 630. Fenri Lunaedge also must never jump a row of buses on a motorcycle 631. Nor start a jukebox by punching it while saying “Eyyyyyy!” 632. Jazz is not to pull Oliver aside to teach him the ways of “The Shining” 633. Even though he sounds like Scattman Crothers 634. Oliver will simply think that Jazz wants to give him a BODY MASSAGE! 635. Mantisk must never hack open your door with an axe, peer inside, and grin maniacally saying “Heeerrre’s Johnny, Johnny!” 636. Condorrock and Soundwave can not unlock “Star Power” if they hit a 50+ note streak. It is wrong to tell them otherwise 637. Whoever’s playing that xylophone as Skullman walks around has a deathwish 638. Even if it’s probably me 639. Whoever takes Hanumachine, he can not RP him as "The Evil Monkey who Lives in My Closet" 640. Anyone caught doing this will be gutted by Deathtanz Mantisk 641. Twice 642. Shademan cannot run a chain of vampire night clubs 643. Nor should he be surprised to see Wesley Snipes come in to single-handedly tear them apart 644. Members of Crimson Twilight can not paint a huge Confederate flag on Sisi 645. Or Turboman 646. Or get them to jump over bridges and ravines 647. Or if they do, Flashman can’t use his time stopper to freeze them in midair and give meaningless narrations in a deep Southern accent 648. See Rule Numbers 640 and 641 about this one 649. No one in Crimson Twilight is to give a “Rebel Yell” 650. Junkman is not Boss Hogg 651. Though Burstgirl must wear Daisy Dukes 652. Lex Loathe does not have a Kryptonite ring. Do not give him one 653. See Rule #648 about this one |
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| Strider Hiryu | Aug 14 2009, 12:55 PM Post #2 |
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Can I have what you been smokin'? :3 |
| Retired from Roleplaying. | |
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| Cobra Omega | Aug 14 2009, 01:04 PM Post #3 |
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There, now you can see Guardian's various elements
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I...can't...stop...laughing! XDD |
![]() *Cobra Omega & Guardian *Death ex Machina *Emeraldo Leone & Rubalina Leone *Craothe Lythuus & Porkler Hamalot *Thornacus Zornillion & Gemini Machina *Drakelor Alpha & Armarando Blitzuuga *Cosmo Man & Solar Knight *Leroy the Chopper Joe *Kaiser & B.D. *Onyxor, Adamantius, & Garnetia Leone *Nu & Xi *Norma Leone & Fiona Leone Thanks Avi for giving me the idea for this. | |
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| Saturn Ballad | Aug 14 2009, 01:06 PM Post #4 |
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Jazz hands!
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XDDDDDDDDD Yes, my XD has multiple mouths. ...... Don't blame GeminiMan, blame GyroMan for making it public. XD |
![]() Lololol it's been years since I went by this username | |
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| Cobra Omega | Aug 14 2009, 01:17 PM Post #5 |
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There, now you can see Guardian's various elements
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Gyro: Oh sure, blame me for it even though I am considered dead in the Main RP! *smacks Gyro* Bad Gyro! No cheating Death! Get back to your Grave! Gyro: Dammit..! *walks away* |
![]() *Cobra Omega & Guardian *Death ex Machina *Emeraldo Leone & Rubalina Leone *Craothe Lythuus & Porkler Hamalot *Thornacus Zornillion & Gemini Machina *Drakelor Alpha & Armarando Blitzuuga *Cosmo Man & Solar Knight *Leroy the Chopper Joe *Kaiser & B.D. *Onyxor, Adamantius, & Garnetia Leone *Nu & Xi *Norma Leone & Fiona Leone Thanks Avi for giving me the idea for this. | |
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| Metabad | Aug 14 2009, 01:17 PM Post #6 |
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I have no pupils and I must scream.
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That Botos and Ferham thing is true, and I support it. But poor poor Sharkman...oh well. |
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| The Wildebeast | Aug 14 2009, 01:19 PM Post #7 |
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Yes, I know it's spelled "Wildebeest"
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And here I was beginning to think that I was the only Roald Dahl fan on the board... |
![]() My Characters: * The Geeky, Gregarious Gadgeteer and The Cautious, Curious Child * The Big, Brutish Brawler * The Sweet, Singing Southerner * The Streetwise Shape Shifter and The Powerful, Perceptive Parisian * The Scrappy Scarlet Speedster * The Thoughtful Therapist * The Brawny, Bubbly Blonde and The Cranky, Caustic Cook * The Sickeningly Psychotic Sadomasochist * The Loyal Latin Luchador and his Amulet Advisor * The Army's Avian Admiral * The Abhorrent Artist and his Mindless, Mumbling Mooks * The Snarky Satirist * The Eccentric, Engineering Entrepreneur Credit to Avi for the idea | |
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| Elec | Aug 14 2009, 02:40 PM Post #8 |
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Can't abscond, bro
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AGGH You mentioned Sari. Dx But thank god you're rejecting it. Aside from that, rule 44. We need to teach Cobra that. >:C |
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Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind. Sometimes you can't have it your way. Deal with it. | |
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| Spark Mandrill | Aug 14 2009, 02:52 PM Post #9 |
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This face will be lying in bed next to you.
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Mine!! My precious!! ... Here are a few others... 202. Despite his heritage, Hunter Chameleon can not fling cows at his foes with catapults from atop an impenetrable castle 203. That’s just cheap. 204. He also can’t taunt his foes with, “Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you!” 205. If Dynamoman doesn’t get his way, he is not to yell “Screw you guys, I’m going home!” 206. General is not to approach a group of random kids with day-to-day advice on what to do if your house is on fire, if someone’s on thin ice, or if there’s a downed powerline. 207. Nor is he to finish his speech with “…And knowing his half the battle!” 208. They will think that he wants to give them a BODY MASSAGE! 209. Fireman will not take kindly to anyone using the top of his head to roast marshmallows or hot dogs 210. First person to play “One Wigned Angel” around Drakelor will personally answer to Deathtanz Mantisk 211. Or around any of Cobra’s characters 212. Isoc does not keep a roll of paper towels or toilet paper in the back of head. 213. …Anymore 214. If Storm Owl says “NO BATTERIES!” even once, he will find himself, bound and gagged in front of the Eight Gentle Judges’ doorstep with a note proclaiming him as a criminal and a child molester. You’ve been warned. 215. Hinoken is not a pyromaniac Sideshow Bob. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 216. Calling the Gemini Spark Twins the “Village Bikes” is just plain crude 217. Hosting a round-table discussion featuring Scylla Storm, Blitzwing, and Beta can only lead to disaster 218. Or even if they host a round-table discussion by themselves. 219. No playing “Boy or Girl?” with Zero, Zeta or Harupia 220. …While they’re in an earshot 221. Anyone who gives Rush a Scooby-Doo ascent should not be surprised to find a blood scythe protruding from their chest. 222. Anyone who calls Regulus “Robo-Rorschach” has sealed their own fate 223. Repliforce is not out to kill a “Pesky moose and sqvuirell,”. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 224. It is wrong for Soundwave to dispatch Laserbeak to watch The Maverick Huntresses, Burstgirl, or Berkana in the shower 225. …Without notifying the rest of the Decepticons first 226. Eggs are not poison to Stoneman, and you are ill-advised to use them as such 227. And if you do not get that reference, you suck. 228. Zeta cannot plan a caper revolving around "boners". 229. And if someone happens to chortle its boner, Zeta should not be outraged and declare, "I'll show them how many boners Zeta can make!" 230. Flameman is not a guard to Agrabah 231. Nor does he menace Aladdin on his downtime 232. And it is wrong to point out that Hyleg Ourobuckle is Jafar in snake form 233. Even if he sounds exactly like him. 234. And no, he can’t have a parrot voiced by Gilbert Godfrey as his scheming companion[/color] |
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| Strider Hiryu | Aug 14 2009, 02:57 PM Post #10 |
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*takes whatever you ben smoking* Ahh.. sweet victory... These are great! |
| Retired from Roleplaying. | |
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| Saturn Ballad | Aug 14 2009, 03:00 PM Post #11 |
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Jazz hands!
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Brilliance. Pure brilliance. |
![]() Lololol it's been years since I went by this username | |
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| Metabad | Aug 14 2009, 03:14 PM Post #12 |
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I have no pupils and I must scream.
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I don't think 234 will happen, Isoc already has Reggae after all. That, and Hyleg has the Altoloid, voiced by NO ONE! And 232/233 made me laugh. |
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| Strider Hiryu | Aug 14 2009, 03:16 PM Post #13 |
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If Dallas wasn't suffering from PTSD, she'd be all happy for this insanity. : D |
| Retired from Roleplaying. | |
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| REX Barron | Aug 14 2009, 03:50 PM Post #14 |
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Multipurpose.
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My version of Napalm needs some love on the list... ;~; Kidding! It was really funny, though. I liked it a lot. XD |
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THE OBLIGATORY SISTER FORUM PLUG [size0]My characters: ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() . [size0]My NPCs: ![]() "I don't see myself as better than EVERYONE, but near everyone is better than YOU." . "Gravs gon' drop it on ya: What goes up mus' come down." . "Shut it now or I'm gonna KILL YOU!" . "All right! Time to roll out!" . "See ya on the highway, bud." . "No problem, bro! I can take care of that." . "You won't get a range named after you, motherfucker." . "What's happening, people?"/"…" . "Judge Tretesta Cerberean reporting! I'm here to kick some ass! Right… Like that'll solve all your problems..." . "You know what they say: To live is to die." . "Move over Grid Man, there's a new MVP in town!" . "Cybertron is cool, but Earth rules." "Are you aware how lucky you are to have lived until now..." . "There's only so much we can do… It's better to act than to say it's not enough and stand down." . "I'm no hero, but if an enemy appears before me, I WILL destroy it!"
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| Cobra Omega | Aug 14 2009, 04:05 PM Post #15 |
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There, now you can see Guardian's various elements
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I thought of a few of things to add to the list. 235. Cobra Omega (the character) is NOT the Cobra Commander. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. 236. Armarando is also not Destro, and none of Cobra's female characters are the Baroness. 237. Especially not Rubalina 238. Onyxor is not Solid Snake. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 239. No calling Adamantius 'Big Drakelor' or Drakelor 'Tiny Adamantius'. 240. ...While they're in a earshot 241. Nu will not invet a 'What-if-machine'. 242. Especially since Kaiser and Drakelor would use it for their perverted fantasies about nearly every female character. EDIT: Got two more. 243. Thornacus is not Thorn or Zorn from FF9, it is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise 244. Thornacus is also not the Joker. Especially not the Dark Knight one. It is wrong to tell Wreck-Gar otherwise. |
![]() *Cobra Omega & Guardian *Death ex Machina *Emeraldo Leone & Rubalina Leone *Craothe Lythuus & Porkler Hamalot *Thornacus Zornillion & Gemini Machina *Drakelor Alpha & Armarando Blitzuuga *Cosmo Man & Solar Knight *Leroy the Chopper Joe *Kaiser & B.D. *Onyxor, Adamantius, & Garnetia Leone *Nu & Xi *Norma Leone & Fiona Leone Thanks Avi for giving me the idea for this. | |
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8:45 AM Jul 11