Mar 28
March 28
Dear Diary,
I arrived on the island I am no to live on. As soon as I got there I hid behind a rock and discarded my spearman clothes, and spear, in a tide pool. That way, no one will confuse me with a spearfighter.
I walked to the barracks to go get some lunch. Not knowing which way to go, I wandered the building and ended up by the general's office by mistake. I turned to go back the other way, but stopped when I overheard a conversation.
"This Sven-damned ATeam..." growled a burly, low voice.
"Sir, why are you angry? The enemy failed to Kampf against our last attack. " whined another voice in a slight British accent.
"Yes, but it's not possible to defeat them... they coordinate too well..." It was the burly voice again. I assumed there were 2 people in the room only. "It's only a matter of time before they find out about the multi-ing. Then all of the alliances will be on our a*s."
"What course of action will you make next, sire? "
"Stonie drop our o8 islands. That's what started this war, after all."
It seemed I was to be on the move again. I remained silent by the door. The talking had momentarily ceased.
"So..." began the burly voice. "How about them Knicks? Did'ya see their game the other day? "
Finding nothing more of my interest (I prefer the Celtics), I searched around for the mess hall again. Finding it, I sat down and had a tasty meal of fish fillet. The food here is much better than the stuff back at home, if that glop can be called food. It's more like school paste and fingernails.
After lunch I went to find a bunk in the Stonethrower lodge. As I walked into the room I was greeted by a young man with a bright smile. "Howdy! " He said. "It's always nice to meet new people! " He began to furiously shake my hand. "I'm Buck. "
Then he pointed to a fat man hunched over on a bunk bed playing a Gameboy. "That over there's Chucky."
"Hey, " Grunted Chucky curtly. Buck then pointed to another stonethrower sitting on a bunk reading.
"That guy's name is Reggie. "
"That's Reginald Anthony Jacobs III to you... peasant..."
"What'ev Reggie. " Buck rebutted. "So, what's yer name?" he asked me.
"Uh... " I was taken aback by the speed of his introduction. "I'm Ralph... "
"Well, HOWDY, Ralphie! " Buck exclaimed. "I'm goin' to the mess hall to go rustle myself up some grub! Ye-hah! " Buck bolted from the lodge to the mess hall.
I turned to Reginald. "Is he always like that? :huh:"
"Unfortunately so... " Reginald muttered. "But then again, all of the soldiers from Ranchville are. "
"Ranchville? "
"Small island, Ocean 3, full of uneducated countrymen completely unlike myself. "
Leaving Reginald to boast, I decided to lie on my bunk. But before I could even sit down, the loudspeaker buzzed "ALL STONETHROWERS IN THE ARMED BATTALLION REPORT TO THE MISSION ROOM FOR IMMEDIATE DEBRIEFING!!"
I sighed and headed off to the mission room, with Chucky and Reginald, the former of which whose eyes were still glued to his Gameboy.
It was dark by the time I reached the mission room. Within, a crowd of stonethrowers had gathered and stood in rows before a podium. I large, tough-looking man stood behind it. "Alright you worthless scraps..." began the man in a burly voice I recognized as the one from behind the door. "High command has directed us to ship you out to remote island 8:2:70. There you will assist in a defense Kampf against invading forces from our sworn enemies, ATeam. It's a long way there, so don't b*tch about it! I want you all in top-fighting condition when you get there. The other members of [ARBAT] are attempting to fleetsteal a large number of ATeam colofleets, and we don't want any screw-ups!"
I whispered to Reginald, "ARBAT?"
"The Armed Battallion. I'll explain later. We don't want to caught speaking in front of General Kudos."
"When you arrive at 8:2:70 you can expect a enemy fleet to be landing 8 seconds after you arrive. Be ready! Get it? Got it? Good. Dismissed!" General Kudos finished with a loud yell, and the Stonethrowers dispersed, heading for the docks.
When I arrived at the docks with Reginald and Chucky, we ran into Buck.
"How-dee, guys! Let's all ride together! :D" offered Buck.
"ACT-ually, I'd rather not- " began Reginald, but he was cut off as Buck half-led,
half-dragged all four of us onto a warship and kicked it off. The warship was a canoe built for 5 people; our other passenger was an elderly, white-bearded old man who had a weary, anxious look on his face. He said nothing to any of us, and we said nothing to him.
"Sooo.... " began Buck. "How about them Knicks? "
More to write tomorrow Diary. It's too dark to write much longer.
Mar 27
March 27
Dear Diary,
I had a rough day. I landed on an island about 5 seconds before the biggest fleet I ever saw landed on it as well. I assumed that they were the enemy, because their army began to throw spears at my group. Arrows and spears fell down like rain upon my squad. Catapults smashed the buildings. Everything seemed to explode at once.
I tried to flee to the Laboratory, but a boulder from a catapult smashed it to bits. The smashing of the lab rendered all of the ships on this island incapable of movement. I was stuck here.
Feeling angry, I picked up a rock out of my rock sack and threw it at an enemy spearfighter. It hit him in the foot. "OW! " He yelled. Then he fell and lay there dead.
I surveyed the area. It was clear that we were going to lose this battle. We were outnumbered at least 8 to 1. I took the dead spearmen's clothes and his spear, and charged off to fight my former allies.
It was there that I saw Gary. "Ralph? " He asked.
"Yeah, it's me." I said.
"You aren't going to use that spear on me, are you? "
"Well, considering that you stole my girlfriend in high school, made fun of me, and keyed my car... Yeah. Probably. "
As I got ready to spear him he got hit with an arrow. "Ralph..." Gary rasped, "You're a loooooooooser..." Then he died. "He was a jerk to the grave, " I muttered.
Looking around again, I saw that the invading army had won. A moment later a huge colony ship landed, and civilians began to pour out. I got on a boat and headed back with the rest of the invasion force to whatever island they had come from.
More to write tomorrow. I'm tried now. Until next time, Diary.
Mar 27
March 26
Dear Diary,
Today I met Jim. Jim was recently drafted to be a spearman. He told he the treachery of his job, how he might be sent away purposely on suicide fleets, or how he might be sent to attack someone with just one other guy. Then he showed me the ship he was supposed to ride in. "That's a ship? " I said. "It's so small. It's looks like a canoe."
"Actually, it's a kayak. " Jim said glumly. "This thing is built to suicide. Look how they rigged it up with explosives on the bottom."
"They'll put explosives on the bottom of our own boat, but they won't even think about giving you a gun? " I asked.
"Our God, Sven, must have been drunk when he created this universe." Muttered Jim. Then he walked away.
Nine o'clock at night now. Fleet spotted heading for an island due east of here. I'm packed on a small ship. There seem to be a hundred of them out here. My job is to go reinforce the attacked island. I won't get there until tomorrow. Why did I have to be drafted into war? Sven-damn my luck.
Until tomorrow, Diary. That is... if there is a tomorrow...
Mar 27
March 25
Dear Diary,
Today I've been drafted. I thought it was just going to be a normal day, but I woke up and the authorities drove me out of my home, dragged me out to a "barracks" (it looks more like a prison) and told me that I was to be a stonethrower. I said " a stonethrower? don't you have guns or anything?" They just looked at me and laughed. Then they walked away...
20 minutes later I knew how to throw stones. It was the oddest thing. I thought the whole process was supposed to take an hour at least, but this barracks was bigger. I guess that means it takes less time.
I hope I don't see any combat. I really hate fighting. Until tomorrow, diary.
11:12 AM Nov 25
