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| The Doghouse; Brackets, Results, and Info for The Pound | |
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| Topic Started: Jan 5 2018, 02:37 PM (337 Views) | |
| Madman | Jan 5 2018, 02:37 PM Post #1 |
The Shit Disturber
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Welcome to the Doghouse Let's keep this simple. On this page, you'll find brackets (thanks to The Monsterworks for letting me use his Challonge account), results, arena (thanks to V900 for the render), signups, and announcements about The Pound. Everything that you need will be here or linked (in red) from here, including: 1) Results 2) Brackets 3) Signups 4) Arena 5) Discussion 2: Results First Round 1. Skuntt (Team Ignition) - Red Square \\ vs // 8. Billie (Ironside Industries) - Blue Square The match begins with a rattle as the chain flails of the hydrant start to spin up and a box rush – more or less – as Skuntt races around the central hazard like someone lit its tail on fire (if, you know, it was a real dog and had a tail). Billie responds by going the opposite way, which would be a pretty clever strategy if it had any kind of drivetrain whatsoever. What it does have is an absurd amount of weapon power. As Dylan adjusts his strategy and loops around the spinning flails of the fire hydrant, a low, menacing hum reverberates across the arena. She’s up tae speed now boys! Unfortunately for everyone looking for a spectacular hit and pieces of Skuntt hitting the ceiling, Dylan’s blisteringly fast bot catches up to Billie before it can reach the safety of a corner, and it nimbly dodges its opponent’s howling drum, delivering a cracking hit of its own to the front left corner of the Ironside Industries entrant. Billie does a lazy roll and manages to land right-side up, but the gyroscopic forces of its terrifying weapon cause it to lose any semblance of control, flipping and twirling wildly across the arena and into the path of the fire hydrant, which smacks it, ironically, right into the corner that it was hoping to reach. However, the sheer speed of Skuntt puts Billie under immediate pressure, and it’s not quite up to full speed when the two machines meet drum-to-drum. Having managed to angle in the tiniest bit, Dylan’s bot gets the better of the exchange, and Avalanche’s bot gets flung up the corner incline, rolling back down out of control. However, Skuntt itself gets launched – if not up, then away – and finds itself racing back from halfway across the arena. Billie repositions itself, but some oversteer allows Dylan to angle in again, and this time Billie lands on its back. A juicy hit to the chassis fails to do much damage, and it’s apparent by now that Skuntt’s drum doesn’t have a lot of power behind it. Further gyroscopic antics from Billie see it driving on one wheel, half out of control, along the arena’s high wall, and Skuntt catches up to it easily enough, popping it over a few more times before a slight miscalculation allows Billie to wobble over onto one of the Team Ignition entry’s upper skids and more or less vaporize it. Dylan fins his bot hurled into the path of the Fire Hydrant with sickening power, and then hurled again, with one of its ventilation overs missing and its top panel flapping loosely. However, Billie just doesn’t have the speed or control to follow up, and Skuntt deftly matadors the attack, turning the tables and cracking Billie right back. With the match clock winding down, Avalanche goes for broke, looking for any contact. Maybe he’s figured out that Skuntt simply can’t hurt his bot, or maybe he knows that he’s trailing on points. With such an anemic drivetrain, however, especially against such a quick one, there’s little that he can do except swing, miss, and absorb another boop from his opponent. The buzzer sounds, and this one’s going to the judges. Aggression: 9-6 Skuntt Damage: 11-4 Billie Strategy: 12-3 Skuntt (1) Skuntt wins a 26-19 judges’ decision and will continue in the winners’ bracket. (8) Billie will drop into the losers’ bracket. 2. Mr. fluffy-kins (Team Carboard Pony) - Red Square \\ vs // 7. Strawberry Flavoured Blood (Arsonists Inc.) - Blue Square The match starts predictably. The chains of the fire hydrant rattle as the enormous hazard starts up, and within moments, they’re spinning at a deadly speed. Strawberry Flavoured Blood (hereafter to be referred to as SFB) begins by following suit, while Mr. fluffy-kins barrels around the fire hydrant like a bat outta hell. It looks like it’s going to be a head-to-head contact, but this is not Pat’s patented ‘bot rush’. No, this is a ‘box rush’, and what’s more, it’s a ruse! “Ha ha!” Pat must be thinking. “I have forced you to reveal your hand most insidiously, and now you are mine! Ha ha!” Having been thoroughly outfoxed by Pat’s superior intellect, Pyro is forced to reveal his master stroke, which is… to just kind of sit there and do his best to keep SFB’s drum facing Mr. fluffy-kins. Mildly disappointed, Pat just uses his bot’s speed advantage to attempt to flank SFB, which is basically hugging the wall. There’s some cat and mouse (or dog and dog?) and so Mr. fluffy-kins settles for angling in. POP! Up and over goes Strawberry Flavoured Blood, drum wailing at full power. It rebounds against the wall and lands upside-down. Pat follows up with a further series of blows that do SFB, which is right-side-up by now, spins up and attacks, and what we get is more or less another two minutes of more of the same. Pat seems summarily uninterested in ending the fight by trying to fling his opponent over the low wall. Perhaps he’s just sadistic and wants to prolong the beating. There is one weapon-to-weapon hit when Pat oversteers, but Mr. fluffy-kins’ drum has a whopping fourteen armour, so Pyro’s gambit of winning weapon-to-weapon amounts to precisely nothing. Don’t get me wrong, Fluffy-kins flies, but SFB doesn’t have the speed to follow up and Pat quickly recovers and picks up where he left off. The buzzer sounds with SFB bouncing off of the wall for what our unofficial Bounce Counter ™, has determined is the fifty-ninth time this match. We’re going to the judges, but it doesn’t seem to be much of a decision. Aggression: 13-2 Mr. fluffy-kins Damage: 8-7 Strawberry Flavoured Blood Strategy: 13-2 Mr. fluffy-kins (2) Mr. fluffy-kins wins a 33-12 judges’ decision and will continue in the winners’ bracket. (7) Strawberry Flavoured Blood will drop into the losers’ bracket. 3. Donut (Team Blood Gulch) - Red Square \\ vs // 6. Pound Puppy (Team Trihunter) - Blue Square With a rattle, the mighty maces of the Fire Hydrant start to move, and they’re accompanied by the sound of the buzzer. Both drums spin up, and our patented Pound Recorder guesstimates that the drum of Donut is just slightly more terrifying than that of Pound Puppy. The latter guns it for the other side of the arena, squirreling and losing valuable time as it rounds the Hydrant, while the former heads for the relative safety of the high wall. All of eleven seconds into the match, the two robots meet drum-to-drum. Donut rebounds hard into the wall that it was using as a backstop, and Pound Puppy flies into the path of the Fire Hydrant, taking a second nasty smack. A thin wisp of white smoke curls out from one of its cooling vents, and its drum is making an odd noise, but it seems otherwise unharmed. Donut is unable to take advantage, however, as the force of the impact has flipped it upside-down. A quick bit of throttle-work by Josh and a careful rev of its drum allows it to gyroscopically flip itself back onto its wheels, and by that time, Pound Puppy is back on the hunt for another hit. With Donut’s maneuver having taken it a couple of yards from the wall, Pound Puppy is actually able to angle in, despite skidding, and the Team Blood Gulch entry’s right side absolutely eats it. The wheel guard is flung towards the ceiling, the skid is mangled, and the frame seems slightly warped. Donut is flung violently towards the corner near the low wall, but Pound Puppy hurtles away, half out of control itself. The end result is that it isn’t able to follow up with a finishing blow. By the time that it recovers, Donut is already heading for safety. Pound Puppy, however, is relentless. Again, it angles in, but this time, it oversteers quite badly. There is no room for error in a fight like this. SMACK!!! Donut’s drum connects and utterly melts Pound Puppy’s left side. Brutal! A wheel nearly achieves escape velocity parts ping off of the walls and ceiling. Thick white smoke billows from the drum spinner’s shattered frame as it twirls, side over side into the Fire Hydrant’s kill zone. A follow-up blow from the hazard rips a panel loose and sprays smouldering batteries across the arena. The buzzer sounds immediately, and safety crews dash into the arena to douse the LiPo fire before it can get out of control. No need to consult the judges on this one! (3) Donut wins by knockout at 1:53 and will continue in the winners’ bracket. (6) Pound Puppy will drop into the losers’ bracket. 4. A Very Big Trotzdem (North-West Sheds) - Red Square \\ vs // 5. Cat (End of the Line LLC) - Blue Square The buzzer sounds, the Fire Hydrant’s chains clink and slither across the floor and, within moments, they’re a whirring mass of death. The same cannot be said for Cat’s drum. It, uh, is moving so slowly that you can actually see its rotation. There must be something wrong with it. I mean, Tali’Zorah’s rolling pin spun faster. Its opponent, A Very Big Trotzdem (hereafter to be referred to as VBT), is no champ in the drum department either – there’s no death hum to be heard – but at least it seems to be a real drum doing real drum things and attempting to be spinny and do damage and stuff. Anyways, Cat is all like ‘meow’ and is pretty much so fast that it’s like those scenes in Dragon Ball Z where the animators are trying to impress you with how fast some crazy-haired dude is by having him disappear from view altogether before reappearing right up in his opponent’s grill like “look, he’s so fast that you couldn’t even see him. Ha ha!” So ya, that’s Cat. VBT can do pretty much nothing except take a vicious hit from Cat’s drum. Noah is rightly pleased with himself. VBT gets absolutely launched almost three inches through the air. Noah oohs and aahs and maybe even sheds a tear at his handiwork, so magnificent it is. Aaaand ya, so a lot more of that happens for the next minute or two. Riley’s bot is fast, but it’s like, Wonder Woman fast, while Noah’s is like Impulse fast (thought I’d say, Flash, didn’t you, you fucking casual? I bet you’ve only watched the big screen movies and like maybe read a couple batman comic as a kid. FYI, Impulse is faster than Barry Allen or Wally West. Fite me. Nao.) Anyways, VBT can’t really get away or angle in. At least Cat can’t really push much because its torque is trash and its weeny little ‘drum’ keeps flicking Riley’s bot a couple of inches off the ground. Every time it tries to push for more than a moment or two, VBT starts to j-hook and Noah decides that discretion is the better part of valour. Cat goes for a cheeky skid-lock from an angle, trying to slip one of its skids over VBT’s left side skid and another under, but it slips a little bit and gets out of the way. It actually oversteers a couple of times, but it corrects so damned quickly (quickly enough for me to remember to institute the ROBOTS speed rule for next time) that Riley can’t take advantage of the momentary openings. Until he does. WHAM! Up and over goes Cat, and again, and again, as Riley sees deliverance and another win to spruce up the ol’ 21-52 record (srsly fam, kudos for posting that thing, I wouldn’t have the balls to do it). A particularly meaty blow right onto one of Cat’s skids seems to have warped it a bit, but then the species-confused robot is inside of the Fire Hydrant’s kill zone and getting smacked by a gigantic spiked mace head (only in this sport can you say shit like that 100% seriously. Can we all just take a moment to appreciate that?). It lands upside down, apparently undamaged, and despite a burst of speed from VBT, manages to zip away just before impact. The issue, going forward, is that it can’t seem to right itself. It has little trouble angling in and resumes its former barrage, but all the blows do is pop it up a few inches – not quite enough to put it right side up. Riley’s able to capitalize on an angled self-righting attempt and smack Cat into the Fire Hydrant again. DELIVERANCE. This time, Cat lands on its feet, and it still has a solid seven lives remaining. The last fifty seconds of the fight see more pushing and bumping, and outfoxing, and flicking, and in the dying moments, Noah finally manages that skid-lock that he’s been going for all match. VBT meets the wall in a fly vs. windshield kind of way, and ends the match being fed into The Hydrant’s kill zone. The buzzer sounds while it’s still tumbling away, and we’re going to the judges. Aggression: 9-6 Cat Damage: 10-5 A Very Big Trotzdem Strategy: 9-6 Cat (5) Cat wins a 23-22 judges’ decision and will continue in the winners’ bracket. (4) A Very Big Trotzdem will drop into the losers’ bracket. 2: Brackets Championship Rematch: fight!  Championship Match Fifth Round Matches Fourth Round Matches Third Round Matches Second Round Matches First Round Matches 3: Deadlines and Announcements 1) You can start RPing for the Championship Rematch. RPs are due the night of Saturday 2018-03-03, at 11:59 PM, but if you can get your RPs in sooner, then I can polish this thing off! 2) The higher seed will always start from the red square, which is the area with the red robot in the linked arena picture. 3) Good luck. Edited by Madman, Feb 24 2018, 12:11 PM.
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Tartarus Robotics Group: 102-32 ||| Black Dog ||| Hellhound SHW: Morality (1-0), Krakatoa (6-1), Neon Rampage (0-0), Intimidator (0-0) HW: Hellhound (29-11), Meanstreak (10-3), Blood Eagle (0-0) MW: Black Dog (10-1), Sundancer (13-2), Eye of Newt (3-0) LW: Savage (3-4), Wild Child (0-1), Hoarfrost (11-4), Krakatoa XS (3-1) FW: Talons Out! (10-3), Hellcat (0-0) HBW: Tiger (1-1), Midnight Sun (0-0) Tournaments Entered "My friend and i may have possibly made a nuke/exponentially growing fully automated chicken farm in minecraft" - The_Angry_Goat "That slash is doing some hard work there" - Trihunter | |
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| Madman | Jan 7 2018, 01:01 PM Post #2 |
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The Shit Disturber
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2: Results Second Round: You're OUT! 1. Skuntt (Team Ignition) - Red Square \\ vs // 5. Cat (End of the Line LLC) - Blue Square Ya, so this entire match is neither driver giving a fuck about strategy. Noa's not even there. He's just placed a dummy there wearing a Team Instinct Pokemon Go hat and let a program run his robot. Dylan is 'aggressive' and 'shit', just like his RP stated. Noah's bot's skids get scratched up as a result, but the faster bot wins because it scores more hits. The crowd goes wild. Aggression: 8-7 Cat Damage: 9-6 Skuntt Strategy: 9-6 Cat (5) Cat wins a 23-22 judges' decision and will continue int he winners' bracket. (1) Skuntt will drop into the losers' bracket. 2. Mr. fluffy-kins (Team Cardboard Pony) - Red Square \\ vs // 3. Donut (Team Blood Gulch) - Blue Square The match starts, the Fire Hydrant makes itself all dangerous, and two different Black Dogs head in two different directions. Pat goes for the patented 'Bot rush', Josh, being the wily veteran that he is senses this coming from the moment he had any concept that this fight could ever potentially happen. Donut makes for a safe corner and gets there just on time, its drum starting to let out a mean-sounding death hum. With zero thought to strategic angling in, Pat slams Mr. fluffy-kins into the powerful weapon head on and gets launched. Donut bounces into the corner that it's using as a back stop and skids partway up the angled surface before coming back down and regaining its drum's lost momentum. Pat comes hurtling again. The same thing happens. It basically repeats for about a minute until Josh decides to follow up one of those big hits. He doesn't have the speed and leaves himself open to being flanked. Pat decides to go head on again. Immovable object, meet irresistible force. This time, Mr. Fluffy-kins eats a mace to face from the Fire Hydrant. Donut ends up back near its corner and tries to follow up again. It manages to just clip Pat's robot, on one of the wheel guards, and that guard is finished. There's more pointless head-to-head. Josh finds his way back to his safe corner. Pat keeps trying to break a fist with his (actually really tough) face, and then Donut's drum starts to have a bit of trouble spinning up, and the pink and black spinner spends most of the final thirty seconds being flicked around by Mr. Fluffy-kins. Pat seems confused and a bit peeved. "why ididnt yuo die?" he grumbles. Josh grumbles something similar but somewhat more articulate. The judges get busy pulling some numbers out of their asses. Aggression: 9-6 Mr. fluffy-kins Damage: 11-4 Donut Strategy: 11-4 Donut (3) Donut wins a 28-17 judges' decision and will continue in the winners' bracket. (2) Mr. fluffy-kins will drop into the losers' bracket. 4. A Very Big Trotzdem (North-West Sheds) - Red Square \\ vs // 8. Billie (Ironside Industries) - Blue Square So, it's new guy who RPs really well but can't stat for shit against the guy who would make even Mystic feel good about himself if Mystic was capable of that. Alas, he's not. So, using the same trick as last time, Billie is able to get up to speed, despite its dismal drive train. It purposely sends itself into a gyro spin once VBT gets close, but Avalanche finds that it's not so easy to precisely control how and when you come out of a gyro spin, especially with a weapon like that. What follows is two minutes of VBT flanking Billie and flipping it again, and again, and again. When Billie's drum hits the ground, it leaves a gouge and flings Billie wherever it is wont to fling him. VBT has the speed to follow up and there's very little breathing room or chance for Billie to get its weapon to full power. The couple of times that it manages to settle to the ground and start to spin up, it just can't turn fast enough to keep from being flanked. It begins charging straight forward, but is dodged with ease. VBT starts to get downright nasty, punting poor Billie into the Fire Hydrant (maybe since its drum can't seem to do anything resembling damage). In doing so, it places itself between Billie and the OOTA zone. Through nothing if not Riley's utter boredom at dominating the fight, he makes a minor error and Billie finally lands a nice, juicy hit. Houston, we have liftoff! VBT nearly breaks free of Earth's gravity and lands right on top of the low wall. It teeters as Billie charges forwards to deliver the coup de grace, but ends up on the right side of the wall and jets away with inches to spare. After a return to our regularly scheduled programming for another thirty seconds, the buzzer sounds and the judges get their Aggression: 11-4 A Very Big Trotzdem Damage: 10-5 Billie Strategy: 9-6 A Very Big Trotzdem (4) A Very Big Trotzdem wins a 25-20 judges' decision and will continue in the losers' bracket. (8) Billie is out of the competition. 6. Pound Puppy (Team Trihunter) - Red Square \\ vs // 7. Strawberry Flavoured Blood (Arsonists Inc.) - Blue Square As the two robots enter the arena, Pound Puppy looks a lot the worse for wear. While Team Trihunter has done an admirable job of cobbling it back together, it's still in rough shape. At the start of the fight, it attempts to spin up, but nothing happens. This could be really bad. Strawberry Flavoured Blood spins up and lurches forward. In no time, a menacing death hum reverberates through the arena. In his eagerness to obliterate his opponent, SFB's driver makes a beeline around the Fire Hydrant, accidentally getting clipped by one of the flails. At first, it seems to have no effect, but after a handful of seconds, it's clear that SFB has drifted to a stop. It sits there, drum wailing, completely unable to move, and is summarily counted out. Pound Puppy's driver thanks whatever deity he happens to believe in, and quickly takes his bot back to the pits to get that drum working for his next match. (6) Pound Puppy wins by KO (FF) at 0:24 and will continue in the losers' bracket. (7) Strawberry Flavoured Blood is out of the competition. Edited by Madman, Jan 15 2018, 01:52 PM.
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Tartarus Robotics Group: 102-32 ||| Black Dog ||| Hellhound SHW: Morality (1-0), Krakatoa (6-1), Neon Rampage (0-0), Intimidator (0-0) HW: Hellhound (29-11), Meanstreak (10-3), Blood Eagle (0-0) MW: Black Dog (10-1), Sundancer (13-2), Eye of Newt (3-0) LW: Savage (3-4), Wild Child (0-1), Hoarfrost (11-4), Krakatoa XS (3-1) FW: Talons Out! (10-3), Hellcat (0-0) HBW: Tiger (1-1), Midnight Sun (0-0) Tournaments Entered "My friend and i may have possibly made a nuke/exponentially growing fully automated chicken farm in minecraft" - The_Angry_Goat "That slash is doing some hard work there" - Trihunter | |
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| Madman | Jan 15 2018, 01:59 PM Post #3 |
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The Shit Disturber
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2: Results Third Round: The Power of Participation! 3. Donut (Team Blood Gulch) - Red Square \\ vs // 5. Cat (End of the Line LLC) - Blue Square Good news, everyone! Both drivers decided to show up for this fight! Ain’t that just a blessing? The buzzer sounds three times, the Fire Hydrant starts a’firin’, and Josh quickly comes to the conclusion that Donut is jealous. Josh lunges for his opponent time and again, but with little luck, and finally, he shows the world that his bot can be a beautiful dancer too, by screwing up and sending it into a gyro spin. Cat pounces immediately, and begins toying with Noah backs off and does the same thing again. He does it once more. He’s doing a really good job at avoiding the drum while pushing. After thrice smacking Donut into the wall, he decides to change things up by plowing it into The Fire Hydrant. Flic, flick, flick! Donut is ~ dancer ~ A somewhat unexpected gyroscopic spin and the fact that a human being can’t consistently react at 0.95x the speed of light allow Josh to finally connect with the drum. One of Cat’s skids enters the afterlife as a beautiful, sparkling shower of lime green debris. Cat also ends up It keeps flanking, but its flicking strategy is counterproductive at this point, and causes Cat to just pop itself up but not over, creating a couple of dangerous openings that Donut nearly takes advantage of. However, because Noah’s not a moron, he just switches the drum off. While it seems to work at first, allowing him to resume his “basically just be a brick lol” strategy, he’s not breaking Donut’s traction. With thirty seconds left in the match, Cat finagles a smack into the central hazard, and Josh’s bot goes tumbling across the arena. Cat’s right on top of it but, still wary of the drum, flanks again, allowing Donut to get up to speed. The next slam attempt ends in disaster. Josh manages to get the drum around just before his bot tastes the Fire Hydrant. The front left corner of Cat goes to Valhalla, and the badly damaged bot rolls lazily through the air, landing with its drum hanging limply and the central belt snapped. With the match clock ticking through its final ten seconds, Cat makes it to the buzzer, but that big hit at the end makes this fight really close. Both drivers prepare their bribes, and the judges prepare their bank accounts. Aggression: 10-5 Cat Damage: 11-4 Donut Strategy: 8-7 Cat (3) Donut wins a 23-22 judges’ decision and will progress to the championship round. (5) Cat will drop into the losers’ bracket 2. mr. fluffy-kins (Team Cardboard Pony) - Red Square \\ vs // 4. A Very Big Trotzdem (North-West Sheds) - Blue Square You know that moment when you think that Pat just has to be pulling one over on you because nobody can be this stunningly illiterate? “avido center paly box rush into very clsoe nad stop let him play hsi cards ot ealry and attack when he has showen to mcuh wheel go for the wheels keep agresavie keep hi mclsoe ot walls avido the hazords good luck” Well, I just had that moment. Thankfully, A Very Big Trotzdem is here, and it has the stats to handle mr fluffy-kins and Pat’s “strategy”. Oh man, I’ve been looking forward to this! The bots line up, and while Pat’s OG-level serious and speaking in tongues, or maybe elvish, or maybe dwarven, Riley has a slurpee, and he’s not quite finished. He’s trying to get that last, delectable bit of mushy goodness, and is making an appropriately loud slurping sound while doing so. Three buzzers sound, the Fire Hydrant rattles and clanks as it spins up, and Pat box rushes. Note the use of the term ‘box rush’. It’s not a ‘bot rush’, folks, which means that Pat’s stopping short. Haha! See? I’ve made my first step towards cracking the Pat code. Meanwhile, Riley has managed to get his straw at an angle where he’s just sucking up that delicious radioactive-blue coloured goo. He’s in the sweet spot, folks, and that slurpee doesn’t stand a chance! Oh wait, neither does his robot because he’s not actually driving it! Pat stops right in front of him, tensely waiting for the sort of tactical masterstroke that Riley is totally, undoubtedly famous for. Aaaaaannnnd he waits, and wait’s some more. A bit of the slurpee has gotten away from Riley, but he’s doubling down now. He thrusts his candy-apple red straw into the corner of the slurpee cup aggressively, but perhaps he overplays his hand, and the straw buckles! CRUNCH! WHAT A BLOW!! Pat, after about thirty seconds of just sitting there, senses that his superior intellect has won the day once again, and drives mr fluffy-kins in to flip VBT around before the referees decide to just count it out and end this fiasco. The day is not without victory for Riley, however. He finally gets that last bit of slurpee and roughly 20 milliliters of runny, lukewarm sugary goodness are his! (2) Mr fluffy-kins wins by TKO (FF) at 0:38 and will continue in the losers’ bracket. (4) A Very Big Trotzdem is out of the tournament 1. Skuntt (Team Ignition) - Red Square \\ vs // 6. Pound Puppy (Team Trihunter) - Blue Square Sadly, while Dylan gets to be ‘aggressive’ in this fight, he doesn’t get to be ‘shit’. That’s reserved for the formerly promising Pound Puppy, which rockets out of its starting square with its drum…not spinning. This becomes a pretty elementary fight for an old hand like Dylan, and he puts Skuntt on autopilot (which is pretty much where it’s been for this whole tournament) after a minute and leaves to go take a dump. When he returns, feeling a couple of pounds lighter, the fight is over, and a couple of volunteers are wheeling his bot out on a dolly for him. Absently, he asks which robot won, and they say… (1) Skuntt wins by KO (FF) at 2:46 and will continue in the losers’ bracket. (6) Pound Puppy is out of the tournament. Edited by Madman, Jan 23 2018, 11:28 AM.
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Tartarus Robotics Group: 102-32 ||| Black Dog ||| Hellhound SHW: Morality (1-0), Krakatoa (6-1), Neon Rampage (0-0), Intimidator (0-0) HW: Hellhound (29-11), Meanstreak (10-3), Blood Eagle (0-0) MW: Black Dog (10-1), Sundancer (13-2), Eye of Newt (3-0) LW: Savage (3-4), Wild Child (0-1), Hoarfrost (11-4), Krakatoa XS (3-1) FW: Talons Out! (10-3), Hellcat (0-0) HBW: Tiger (1-1), Midnight Sun (0-0) Tournaments Entered "My friend and i may have possibly made a nuke/exponentially growing fully automated chicken farm in minecraft" - The_Angry_Goat "That slash is doing some hard work there" - Trihunter | |
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| Madman | Jan 24 2018, 02:58 PM Post #4 |
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The Shit Disturber
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2: Results Fourth Round: Autopilot, Engage! 1. Skuntt (Team Ignition) - Red Square \\ vs // 2. mr fluffy-kins (Team Cardboard Pony) - Blue Square Ladies and gentlemen, here's the fight we've all been waiting for: an epic clash between two of ARC's great tactical geniuses: the linguistically The buzzer buzzes three times, the Fire Hydrant gets to hydrating. It's gonna need its stamina for what's sure to be a long fight because both bots apparently forgot the purpose of a drum spinner and didn't add any damage to their drums. FFS, I can't even run a self-aggrandizing ego-trip of an event meant to make Black Dog look good because you fuckers won't play along! Oh ya, there's a 'fight' happening. Well, someone, somewhere, just lost a lot of money, because Pat didn't 'bot rush'. He didn't even 'box rush'. FFS, Pat, old buddy, you're slipping. Instead, mr fluffy-kins plays it defensive, while the algorithm representing Dylan has had its aggression setting dialed up to ten, and its difficulty rating set to 'Final Boss'. Meanwhile, Dylan sits down to draw some tracks on his iPad, but only ends up drawing Final Destiny. Oh ya, there's a 'fight' happening! So, Skuntt is able to angle in on mr fluffy-kins repeatedly due to its better speed and control, and this fight goes about 70-30 in the Team Ignition entry's favour, with Pat's bot being sent into the hazard more than once and nearly toppled out of the arena. Pat, however, with the calm, practiced patience of a Zen pony master, waits, coiled up like a...pony, ready to strike when the time is right. Well, Pat, I've got some news for you. The time is never right. Three minutes of reasonably competitive but clear-cut action follows, and the buzzer sounds with the outcome in little doubt. Aggression: 12-3 Skuntt Damage: 9-6 Skuntt Strategy: 9-6 Skuntt (1) Skuntt wins a 30-15 judges' decision and will face (5) Cat for a place in the grand final. (2) mr fluffy-kins is out of the competition. |
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Tartarus Robotics Group: 102-32 ||| Black Dog ||| Hellhound SHW: Morality (1-0), Krakatoa (6-1), Neon Rampage (0-0), Intimidator (0-0) HW: Hellhound (29-11), Meanstreak (10-3), Blood Eagle (0-0) MW: Black Dog (10-1), Sundancer (13-2), Eye of Newt (3-0) LW: Savage (3-4), Wild Child (0-1), Hoarfrost (11-4), Krakatoa XS (3-1) FW: Talons Out! (10-3), Hellcat (0-0) HBW: Tiger (1-1), Midnight Sun (0-0) Tournaments Entered "My friend and i may have possibly made a nuke/exponentially growing fully automated chicken farm in minecraft" - The_Angry_Goat "That slash is doing some hard work there" - Trihunter | |
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| Madman | Feb 6 2018, 10:19 AM Post #5 |
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The Shit Disturber
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2: Results Fifth Round: Revenge is a Dish Best Served Nonchalantly 1. Skuntt (Team Ignition) - Red Square \\ vs // 5. Cat (End of the Line LLC) - Blue Square Dylan walks in wearing a Flash costume and chugging Mountain Dew. Noah’s brought the bag of Doritos and saunters in wearing only flip flops and swim trunks. He plugs Cat’s controller into his tablet, which runs algorithms that’ll ingeniously do the fighting for him. It’s clear from the get-go that both competitors are deeply invested in this match. In some ways, it’s a repeat of last time, with Skuntt summarily unable to damage Cat’s wheels in any appreciable way, and Cat hilariously trying and failing to get its opponent out of the arena. I don’t give a fuck what their control ratios are. Both of these bots are too fast for human reflexes to actually keep up with, so both score some free hits. Cat’s ‘drum’ basically does negative damage. It’s so weak that it gives away damage points when it hits. Skuntt’s drum does a vicious single point of damage, basically sweeping the category by default. Unfortunately, it spends most of the match getting popped up and slammed into, though between its speed and the slipperiness of its design, it j-hooks away 90% of the time and doesn’t eat many wall slams. When it does get the rare opportunity to attack Cat’s wheels, mostly due to reflex-based errors on Noah’s part, it doesn’t have the power to take advantage, despite Dylan’s assertion that he can knock one side of the drivetrain out by doing one point of corner damage. Alright there, buddy. I’ve got a slightly used torque-reaction flipper I’d like to sell you. Dylan also makes no play at the OOTA, which is realistically his only shot. He does manage to chain a couple of hits, however, between being mostly outmaneuvered. After three edge-of-your-seat minutes, this one goes to the judges. Aggression: 10-5 Cat Damage: 11-4 Skuntt Strategy: No. (1) Skuntt wins a 16-14 judges’ decision and will face (3) Donut in the grand final. (5) Cat is out of the competition. |
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Tartarus Robotics Group: 102-32 ||| Black Dog ||| Hellhound SHW: Morality (1-0), Krakatoa (6-1), Neon Rampage (0-0), Intimidator (0-0) HW: Hellhound (29-11), Meanstreak (10-3), Blood Eagle (0-0) MW: Black Dog (10-1), Sundancer (13-2), Eye of Newt (3-0) LW: Savage (3-4), Wild Child (0-1), Hoarfrost (11-4), Krakatoa XS (3-1) FW: Talons Out! (10-3), Hellcat (0-0) HBW: Tiger (1-1), Midnight Sun (0-0) Tournaments Entered "My friend and i may have possibly made a nuke/exponentially growing fully automated chicken farm in minecraft" - The_Angry_Goat "That slash is doing some hard work there" - Trihunter | |
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| Madman | Feb 24 2018, 12:01 PM Post #6 |
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The Shit Disturber
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2: Results "Grand" Final: Oh Hey, This Thing is Over 1. Skuntt (Team Ignition) - Red Square \\ vs // 3. Donut (Team Blood Gulch) - Blue Square It's Grand Final Time! Who's excited?! Are you, Brad? Oh no...you're excited about that home improvement magazine...a little too excited, if you ask me. How about you, Wolf51-50? Oh no, nevermind. You're busy making Coop de Grass a walker again. So much for principles when WINNING is on the line, amirite, amigo? How about you, Kody? Enjoying a different kind of grass. Maybe you can take that outside, homeboy? Gabe? Trying to keep up with 37.3 different RPGs. Riley? Busy losing at something. Pat? ...You don't even wanna know, fam. Seriously. Alex? Dude lives in China. He's probably asleep at this time! Alex V? He has no tablet, so sadly he is not people anymore. Dylan? Not excited. Trihunter? Well, you know what? This guy's excited. Yeah, the guy writing this, and that's all that matters because I'm like the only one paying attention to this thing anymore. There's some introductory BS, the buzzer does its buzzing thing and that mighty hydrant chain flail rattles and starts a-whirring. The same goes for both drums, but only one manages something like a death hum. Dylan immediately tries flanking Josh's bot, which is playing it defensive. His first try doesn't quite succeed, and a drum to drum ends with Skuntt being hurled into the path of the Hydrant, summarily flung in another direction, and Donut charging in on the attack. It doesn't quite have the drivetrain to follow up, though, and Skuntt zips away with time to spare, this time managing to flank its opponent. It's Donut's turn to take a trip to the Hydrant, and Skuntt has the speed to follow up. And again. And again. Closer and closer to the OOTA wall. Finally, a bit of gyro action actually works in Josh's favour, and he manages to dodge Dylan's next charge. This unexpectedly gives him Skuntt's side, but that bot is so fast and Dylan's reflexes are so amazing that it avoids taking any crippling damage. That's not to say that it takes nothing. One of its wheelguards gets peeled back like the tin foil on a Hershey's Kiss and sent towards the ceiling. Skuntt skids just into the path of The Hydrant and takes another smack. Donut again isn't able to follow up, but now it has the advantageous OOTA positioning. Aaaaaaaannnd... Skuntt is gone. But not out of the arena. It avoids Donut's charge nimbly and gains the advantage. Donut meets with the Hydrant and gets flung. Skuntt is waiting. More chaining flips and we're heading back towards the OOTA wall. Oh Mah GAWD! Donut's perched on the edge. It's tottering! It's teetering. It's tittering (that's a real word, BTW, and it's not a dirty one). It's twittering or uh... tweeting: "OMG, close call. So scared rite now. #Skuntt #ThePound #GrandFinal #OOTA #Cliffhanger" It falls back into the arena. I've done this twice now. The joke is used up. Anyway, Skuntt is right back on it like a fly on a turd. There's more flanking and semi-flanking. Donut tries to hold its position by pivoting on the spot, and it succeeds about half of the time. The other half mostly features it getting booped repeatedly, much to Josh's annoyance. Dylan sips Mountain Dew through a crazy straw, wearing shades and a 'umadbro' expression on his face like it's 2015. Oh, look at that! The fight just ended. The judges have gotten their scorecards out. Aggression: 11-4 Skuntt Damage: 11-4 Donut Strategy: 9-6 Skuntt (1) Skuntt wins a 24-21 judges' decision and will face (3) Donut in a rematch for the title next week! |
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Tartarus Robotics Group: 102-32 ||| Black Dog ||| Hellhound SHW: Morality (1-0), Krakatoa (6-1), Neon Rampage (0-0), Intimidator (0-0) HW: Hellhound (29-11), Meanstreak (10-3), Blood Eagle (0-0) MW: Black Dog (10-1), Sundancer (13-2), Eye of Newt (3-0) LW: Savage (3-4), Wild Child (0-1), Hoarfrost (11-4), Krakatoa XS (3-1) FW: Talons Out! (10-3), Hellcat (0-0) HBW: Tiger (1-1), Midnight Sun (0-0) Tournaments Entered "My friend and i may have possibly made a nuke/exponentially growing fully automated chicken farm in minecraft" - The_Angry_Goat "That slash is doing some hard work there" - Trihunter | |
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| Madman | Mar 22 2018, 12:23 AM Post #7 |
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The Shit Disturber
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2: Results "Grand" Final Rematch: Oh Hey, This Thing is Actually Over 1. Skuntt (Team Ignition) - Red Square \\ vs // 3. Donut (Team Blood Gulch) - Blue Square Okay, so after a nice long OMGIhavesomuchschoolworkIdon'tknowwhattodoWTFI'mgonnafailandflunkoutpanicpanicpanic break, we're back with the long and eagerly awaited grand final rematch of The Pound! Anticipation among the ARC community has reached a fever pitch. I mean, Brad almost looked up from his computer. Gabe took the time to give a snarky look. Maybe next time we'll even get a snarky remark! Kody is probably high, which means that he's in a celebratory mood, right?! Nick is still gay. The other Nick is still Scottish. Alex M sent me a message all the way from China to the tune of "hey bro, whatever happened to that Black Dog thing?", and Alex V exists again. Yes sir, indeed. community investment is at a high-water mark. These are halcyon days! Okay, so Dylan comes in wearing his lucky, slightly Mountain Dew-stained Flash outfit. Josh comes out looking like one of those guys who's not quite 'cool' or douchey enough to be a UFC bro type, so he settled for being a WWE bro type instead. The two robots are carted into the arena, prep stuff happens, and then the box is locked, the lights are on, and it's robot fighting time! The Hydrant flail in the middle immediately gets to spinning, as do the combatants: Dylan's Skuntt and Josh's Donut. The more mobile Team Ignition bot dances around, with its slower opponent following and quite aggressively trying to bring its drum into play. It whiffs by the barest of margins and Skuntt quickly manages to score the first hit in retaliation. Donut tumbles backwards and takes a hit from the hydrant, which flings it towards a corner, but thankfully nowhere near the OOTA wall, in addition to righting it. Skuntt manages a couple of follow-up blows before Donut squirms free and gets its weapon back up to speed. A near head-to-head meeting sees both bots flicked backwards, but neither decisively. Skuntt capitalizes with a nice chain of hits that takes Donut towards the OOTA wall, but its drum runs out of steam before it can do the deed, and Donut is back on the attack. Playing things straighter, with more charges and less attempting to keep up with Skuntt's rapid pivoting seems to be paying dividends for Josh. Donut's experiencing less gyroscopic wheel lift, and the result is that there are less quality openings for Dylan. He decides to take advantage of a brief bit of lift, but it's fool's gold. Donut comes down and its powerful drum launches Skuntt end over end through the air. Josh guns his bot forward, and manages to clip and basically obliterate a side guard, flipping Skuntt again in the process, but the Team Ignition bot gets away without any further damage. Donut continues its aggression, however, and while it mostly ends up on the losing end of exchanges, there's the sense that what Skuntt does isn't really that decisive. Its attempts to chain at length don't seem to be working, as its drum runs out of steam or Donut almost always slips away before an OOTA can become a serious danger. Meanwhile, one gets the impression that Donut needs just one shot to anywhere but the drum. One shot to really change the complexion of this fight (which is, admittedly, in Skuntt's favour). With about thirty seconds left, the Team Blood Gulch entry lands another drum-to-drum blow, and Skuntt flies. Donut tries, for the umpteenth time in the match history of these two, to follow up, and finally manages to get itself right into the path of the still-tumbling Skuntt. SMACK!!! Skuntt comes apart in an explosion of metal, bolts, screws, and a wheel. when it comes down, it's clearly a spent force, the left side of its chassis torn wide open, a wheel missing, and batteries hanging out. The referees immediately begin their count and finish ten seconds later. The winner, and your champion by KO at 2:47, is the number three seed, Team Blood Gulch's Donut!! Congratulations to Josh on adding another title to his enviably long list, and we look forward to seeing you next time, whenever that might be! |
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Tartarus Robotics Group: 102-32 ||| Black Dog ||| Hellhound SHW: Morality (1-0), Krakatoa (6-1), Neon Rampage (0-0), Intimidator (0-0) HW: Hellhound (29-11), Meanstreak (10-3), Blood Eagle (0-0) MW: Black Dog (10-1), Sundancer (13-2), Eye of Newt (3-0) LW: Savage (3-4), Wild Child (0-1), Hoarfrost (11-4), Krakatoa XS (3-1) FW: Talons Out! (10-3), Hellcat (0-0) HBW: Tiger (1-1), Midnight Sun (0-0) Tournaments Entered "My friend and i may have possibly made a nuke/exponentially growing fully automated chicken farm in minecraft" - The_Angry_Goat "That slash is doing some hard work there" - Trihunter | |
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