Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Info Thread

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Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Info Thread; Brackets, Fight Cards, Write Cards, and Results, oh my!
Topic Started: Dec 21 2017, 03:08 PM (1,236 Views)
Sylandrophol	Dec 21 2017, 03:08 PM Post #1
They/Them Posts: 382 Group: Members Member #100 Joined: September 25, 2012	MIDDLEWEIGHT BRACKET http://challonge.com/RFNS1MW Biological Warfare Division Valravn: 0-1 Boring Brown Wedge: 0-1 Ikea's Guard Dog: 0-0 Nuclear Plague XL: 0-0 Incredible Dawg Adventure: 1-0 Neophyte Redglare: 1-0 The Deliverer Division Chaotic Insurgency: 0-1 Sekhmet: 1-0 Magica: 0-0 Precise Saunter Mk.3: 0-0 Stingray: 0-1 Glitch: 1-0 -- HEAVYWEIGHT BRACKET http://challonge.com/RFNS1HW Vomit Comet Division Tongue Of The Fatman: 1-0 Dysprosinator: 0-1 Doomerang 3: 0-1 Hati And Skoll: 1-0 Infrared: 1-0 Tria Prima: 0-1 No Excuses Division -- Trial And Error: 0-1 Crosscut: 0-1 Highland Fling: 0-1 Dock Leaf 2: 1-0 America Offline: 1-0 Death Metal: 1-0 -- Week 1 fight cards, and write cards are coming up soon! Edited by Sylandrophol, Jan 6 2018, 06:49 PM.
	TEAM FOXTROT UNIFORM Thunderstryke - New Blood Tournament Semi-Finals Neophyte Redglare - Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Quarter-Finals America Offline - Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Quarter-Finals -- Ruination 4 Mushroom Cloud: 6-1 Biological Warfare: 1-6 America Offline: 2-4 (5-9 total) Space Cadet: 5-2 -- Robo*Con Neophyte Redglare: 1-1 (7-9 total) -- "I'm curious what tactical advantage you're hoping to gain by sacrificing a portion of your bots size/weight for a deployable banana" -NWOWWE 2017 "@That Kode Guy this man just threatened to enact biological warfare on your cartoon wife" -V900 2018


Sylandrophol	Dec 21 2017, 04:03 PM Post #2
They/Them Posts: 382 Group: Members Member #100 Joined: September 25, 2012	WEEK 1 FIGHT CARDS/WRITE CARDS -- Middleweight Biological Warfare Division Neophyte Redglare V.S Valravn [HFL] Both robots start out aggressive, cruising right across the arena and meeting pretty much in the center. Valravn jukes sideways, and tries to get around the front wedge of Neophyte Redglare, but Neophyte is not letting it happen. The bots circle around for a while, jockeying for position; these designs are both heavily reliant on their wedges, and getting under first will be crucial. Finally they make contact, banging together at an angle, and Valravn�s front forks ride right up Redglare�s wedge. It sort of ramps off, and almost gets flipped over by the momentum, but comes back down on its wheels. Again, Valravn tries to get around the side of Neophyte Redglare, but the two drivetrains are very evenly matched, and they end up hitting head-on. And again, Redglare gets underneath Valravn�s forks, and starts pushing the lifter backward. It ends up sliding off at an angle, and Redglare never gets enough bite to use its flipper, but it�s now apparently that Redglare has the lower wedge, and that could be crucial. Valravn finally gets its spatula underneath the corner of Redglare�s plow, and up goes the lifter. Redglare is thrust sideways, and topples onto its back! It tries to back off, but with the new design of the flipper it has next to no traction when inverted. Valravn catches it and tries to pin it inverted underneath its arm, but Redglare fires its flipper, self-righting and shoving Valravn away in one stroke. Redglare goes right back on the attack, and after a bit more circling gets under the side of Valravn. This time it has enough bite for a flip, and sends Valravn flying into its back near the wedge wall. Valravn self-rights, but Redglare gets under it again and gives it a much weaker flip that tips it onto its side again. It tries to push it into the wall drum, but without success, and settles for keeping it from self-righting until the pin timer expires. And basically, it�s two more minutes of back and forth. Aside from the two robots taking a couple hits from the killsaws and pulverizers, with both Valravn�s top spikes and Redglare�s flipper fork getting slightly bent, neither is really able to do much to each other, but Neophyte Redglare is able to do a bit more thanks to its lower wedge. It gets several more flips in; Valravn also manages to get to its side and overturn it a couple times, and once intercepts Redglare�s self-righting and knocks it onto its back again with an empty accumulator, then shoves it into the wall drum. Redglare definitely controlled more of the match, but that could be decisive. Judges� Decision: Damage: Neophyte Redglare 8, Valravn 7 Aggression: Neophyte Redglare 7, Valravn 8 Control: Neophyte Redglare 10, Valravn 5 Your winner, by a 25-20 Judges� Decision, is Neophyte Redglare! Boring Brown Wedge V.S Incredible Dawg Adventure [Syl] In the red square, we have Team Trihunters' aptly named Boring Brown Wedge, and in the blue square, we have End Of The Line LLC's 360 lifter/flipper combo Incredible Dawg Adventure, or whatever it is. Anyway, the match begins and the two bots launch out of their starting squares, with Boring Brown Wedge intending to outwedge Incredible Dawg Adventure. The two bots angle in, with IDA going full aggression, if it got any more aggressive, it'd be ripping off it's shirt for an Infowars skit. IDA gets a good wedge in on Boring Brown Wedge, and proceeds to raise up it's lifter, raising Boring Brown Wedge's... Boring brown wedge off of the ground. Noah proceeds to go into the charge, as IDA begins to attempt to plow BBW into the arena walls, and it gets a good ram in on it, but BBW manages to get off! But in the process, BBW inverts itself, not like that matters much anyway. For the most part, it's BBW getting pushed and clamped across the arena, but BBW makes it hard for IDA to do so. Eventually, BBW gets a lucky break, and manages to bully IDA across the arena, getting a good flip in via the drum wall! IDA gets tossed upwards, but gets a good self-right in, and is back in on the action, attempting to get a good wedge in on IDA. The rest of the fight is really unremarkable, but i guess that's the price you pay for watching a Wedge War, IDA and BBW gets in some hazards, and some wedgy exchanges, and IDA getting a good Clampy Clompy Wompy� on BBW, but the buzzer sounds as IDA plows BBW into the wall! Looks like this one will be going to the judges, folks. Damage: 8-7 Boring Brown Wedge Control: 6-9 Incredible Dawg Adventure Aggression: 6-9 Incredible Dawg Adventure Incredible Dawg Adventure wins on a 20-25 decision! Ikea's Guard Dog V.S Nuclear Plague XL [~~Shaba~~ HFL] Ikea�s Guard Dog charges across the arena as Nuclear Plague XL starts to spin up, and Nuclear Plague starts coming out to meet it, but midway across the arena Ikea�s Guard Dog swerves sideways. It tries to go for the side of Nuclear Plague, but NP backs off a bit, retreating back towards its starting square. IGD tries to get around the side again � Nuclear Plague turns to face it, but by now the weapon is at full speed and it gyrodances a little bit � just enough for Ikea�s Guard Dog to come in at an angle and get underneath it! It slams Nuclear Plague into the spike strip, but can�t really push it anywhere else. Instead, it settles for pinning it, and tipping NP backward until the drum hits the spikes and is stopped. Nuclear Plague finally gets free and retreats, getting up to speed again. Ikea�s Guard dog is immediately in pursuit, and manages to angle in on NP�s wedge again, but this time NP manages to spin away, barely avoiding the killsaws. A bit more jockeying for position, and they meet head-on. Ikea�s Guard Dog forces its lifter into the floor, but it�s not enough! It gets sent flying into the air! NP darts in for another hit, and catches IGD�s rear wheel as it runs away, but the slowed drum only bends the axle, and the wheel stays attached. Ikea�s Guard Dog self-rights, but takes another glancing blow before it can lower the lifter completely. This time the angle of the impact sends both bots spinning away instead of flipping IGD, but there�s a little dent in the tip of the wedge. We�ll have to see whether that affects its ability to get under Nuclear Plague in the future. So far it doesn�t look like it � IGD angles in again and slams Nuclear Plague into the wall drum. Nuclear Plague is flipped over on its back � it�s invertable, but the drum is spinning downward now, and IGD�s too fast for it to run away and hit the wall. It has to settle for hitting its opponent�s wedge, which tosses it high into the air. It lands in a full faceplant, and the drum kicks it back onto its wheels, but it�s briefly stopped. IGD charges it again, and despite riding up the wedge it pushes Nuclear Plague backward into the wedge wall. But it flips itself over in the process, and the killsaws get in the way of its retreat, letting Nuclear Plague tag it with the drum again. There�s no real damage, but it knocks IGD onto its side with the lifter partially raised. It madly spins its wheels to get back down, but this leaves it in a bad position, and this time Nuclear Plague takes a wheel off! Ikea�s Guard Dog is limping around the arena now, and Nuclear Plague is able to get up to full speed again. It delivers another hit to IGD�s wedge, but can�t follow up and attack its chassis. And IGD gets under Nuclear Plague again, and forces it into the pulverizer! The hammer drops, and BANG! Nuclear Plague�s drum catches the hammer and deflects it away, which probably saves the robot, but that stops its weapon. The impact also lets it get free of IGD�s wedge, but IGD is right on top of it again, and it pushes both robots over the killsaws! White sparks fly everywhere, but in the aftermath IGD is still moving, while Nuclear Plague has lost the tread on its right wheel. It spins back up, and frantically turns to keep its weapon pointed at Ikea�s Guard Dog, and gets another hit! IGD�s wedge is really starting to get beat up now, but with its damaged drivetrain, Nuclear Plague can�t take advantage of the hits. Time runs out with both robots still moving. Judges� Decision: Damage: Nuclear Plague XL 9, Ikea�s Guard Dog 6 Aggression: Nuclear Plague XL 6, Ikea�s Guard Dog 9 Strategy: Nuclear Plague XL 8, Ikea�s Guard Dog 7 Your winner, by a 23-22 Split Decision, is Nuclear Plague XL! The Deliverer Division Glitch V.S Chaotic Insurgency [HFL] And we�re off! There�s been a lot of ground-clearance-related trash talk before this fight, let�s see how it ends up playing out. Glitch, which is using its spinner, gets up to speed and heads out into the middle of the arena. Chaotic Insurgency comes out to meet it, leading with its plow, but both are hesitant to strike the first blow. Glitch hangs back, just turning to keep its disc pointed at Chaotic Insurgency, while CI circles around, but doesn�t come in for the hit. Glitch finally gives chase, but Chaotic Insurgency seems to be waiting for something, and it�s not getting it. Boo! This is Robot Fight Night, not Dancing with the bots! Get stuck in! Glitch gyrodances a little trying to stay pointed at CI, and that seems to be CI�s cue to attack. It darts in, still with the plow, but Glitch is fully on the ground by the time they make contact, and BANG! Chaotic Insurgency goes flying backwards� or forwards, or whatever. I�m only a lowly commentator, I don�t understand turrets! Anyway, it almost tips over sideways, but stays on its wheels. There�s a gash in the front of the plow now, though, and Glitch wants more. It charges in, and Chaotic Insurgency just barely manages to avoid the narrow feeder wedge. It gets under the corner, and due to the bots� location it slams Glitch into the spike strip, but can�t manage to pin it due to Glitch�s high ground clearance. And again, CI�s plow goes head-to-head with Glitch�s wedge, and Glitch gets under. Sparks fly, but the spinner doesn�t really bite in, and CI is able to back off without getting flipped. Both bots get back away from the walls, and again Chaotic Insurgency is being a bit tentative, possibly wisely. Glitch isn�t that keen about chasing it, but at this stage it�s still displaying slightly more aggression, and has certainly caused more damage. Eventually they have to make contact again. CI manages to angle in on Glitch again and take it over the killsaws, and Glitch gets tossed away. But it comes right back, and finally flips CI, tossing it onto its side. CI immediately starts spinning its turret to self-right, but Glitch is quick enough to smack it on the side of the turret as it does so. The hit tears a big gash in the armor, and CI ends up on its side again. Glitch tries to attack the lifter, but by this point its disc has nearly stopped. The turretbot manages to get back on its wheels after a bit of flailing, and almost shoves Glitch into the wall drum, but takes another grinding blow on its plow. There are a few more exchanges that don�t really do much, but eventually Glitch flips CI over again, and this time its followup hit catches Chaotic Insurgency straight on the wheel! Chunks of tread fly, and the core of that wheel looks severely mangled and gouged up. And now CI is going in circles, that left� right� whatever, one of its wheels isn�t turning at all! It has the speed to keep its plow pointed at Glitch, but that doesn�t do much for it, especially as about half of the plow�s lip isn�t touching the ground anymore. At this point Glitch is just picking it apart � ripping off a wedgelet, cutting through one of the pipes supporting the lifter, and breaking the plow free of one of its mounting pins and leaving it lopsided. Chaotic Insurgency is somehow able to make it to the time limit hobbling around on one wheel, but the plow�s trashed, there are gashes in the armor, and the turret seems to only have about half of its rotation range. Glitch has been trailing a drive chain around for half the match, presumably from its trip over the saws, and the left rear wheel has stopped, but I don�t think it�s enough. Judges� Decision: Damage: Glitch 11, Chaotic Insurgency 4 Aggression: Glitch 9, Chaotic Insurgency 6 Strategy: Glitch 10, Chaotic Insurgency 5 Your winner, by a 30-15 Judges� Decision, is Glitch! Sekhmet V.S Stingray [Syl] In the red square, we have Team Instant Regret's nasty vertical spinner, Sekhmet, and in the blue square, we have Team Yellow Alert's puncher Stingray. No, i'm not sure if it's the real BEES in the booth, they could be a robot alien demon for all i know of. Anyway, the match begins, and Sekhmet spins up, as Stingray drives out of it's starting square, driving slowly to compensate for the fact that Stingray is pretty much literally on ice skates and has a horrid speed-traction ratio. Sekhmet proceeds to drive out of it's starting square, and veers right, heading behing the killsaws. BEES is cursing to themselves right now, as Stingray slips and slides across the arena, barely managing to maneuver around the killsaws. The two bots angle in towards eachoter, and Stingray gets a fairly decent punch in on Sekhmet. It's a pyrrhic victory for Stingray, however, as Sekhmet rams it, and it gets sent flying, and a nasty gash on Stingray's front appears. Stingray goes down with a THUNK near the pulverizers near the blue square, and boy, it was a long journey for Stingray. Looks like the impact from Sekhmet managed to screw over Stingray's punching system, and a part of it's right drive motor. Stingray's still standing however, and that's the Team Yellow Alert engineering for ya! Stingray and Sekhmet angle in and attempt to meet eachother, with Stingray struggling to face forward. Stingray attempts to get another punch in on Sekhmet, but it looks like it's bar is stuck forward once BEES fired it! Sekhmet gets another decent pound in on Stingray, and chucks Stingray into the pulverizer corner. And that's where we get the confirmation that Stingray has pretty much gone kaput. Your winner, in 0:57, is Sekhmet! Magica V.S Precise Saunter Mk. 3 [~~Shaba~~ V900] Magica has it's hammer protection on for this fight, along with 9 armor compared to PS' 10-power hammer. So there's that. "Robot fightin' time" commences and both guys book it at the other. Well, kind of. Precise Saunter's being "cautious" not to fall for any hardcore bamboozles. Pyro prods TBR real good and slides under the wedges due to PS having ground clearance. Saunter tries to smack the hydraulics, but it just isn't working out too well aside from a few glancing blows (which are not enough to ruin them). Still better than the damage Magica is putting out (which amounts to exactly nothing). Turns out a brick with 2 torque vs a hammer that can't damage it (which also has 2 torque for some reason) makes for a pretty boring match! So they basically just shove each other around for 3 minutes. Saunter makes some cool looking nicks and dents in Magic that ultimately don't amount to anything, Magica manages to get Saunter into the wall drum this one time, but it self-rights pretty quickly as the match slogs on. The match buzzer sounds, and the crowd goes mild!! Damage: 9-6 Precise Saunter Aggression: 9-6 Magica Strategy: 8-7 Magica Magica wins by JD 23-22 -- Heavyweight Vomit Comet Division Tria Prima V.S Tongue Of The Fatman [HFL] All three sections of Tria Prima come out of their starting square with a purpose, Mercury flanked by the two minibots. Tongue of the Fatman, meanwhile, is skirting fairly near the wall. The minibots try to surround Fatman, but Fatman just turns right towards Salt and lumbers after it. Salt retreats though, turning away in a circle, and as TotF keeps chasing it, Sulphur comes in and slides under its rear end. Fatman still has one wheel on the ground though, and spins away. Meanwhile, Mercury comes in on the attack, taking advantange of the distraction to go for TOTF�s wheel. Thanks to Fatman trying to turn around Mercury misses its target, but still gets underneath the side of the flipper and tosses it through the air. Fatman does a full 360, and ends up landing on the wedge wall and sliding down. Mercury is already back up to speed, and chases after Tongue of the Fatman while the minibots try to go for the other side, but TotF ignores them and meets Mercury head-on. This time the front wedgelets stop Mercury from getting under it, and it rides up right onto the flipper! And Tongue of the Fatman does not hold back! Mercury is sent flying, getting launched six or seven feet in the air and halfway across the arena horizontally. It crashes down, bouncing and flipping end over end as the drum hits the floor, but comes to rest on its back. It�s supposed to be able to self-right from there using torque reaction, but right now it�s just flopping around and driving in circles. Meanwhile, Salt and Sulphur both go after TotF in Mercury�s absence, and Salt manages to get under the flipper. It slowly starts to push it towards the pulverizer, but TotF just spins free again, and after another couple of attempts at harassment, with TotF chasing Sulphur around, it finally catches it! HA HA HA! THAT�S COME DOWN WITH SNOW ON IT! No, wait, that�s not snow, that�s glass! Tongue of the Fatman has launched Sulphur into the arena lights! The minibot�s left wheel breaks off on landing, and there�s now a battery hanging out the back. TotF also flips itself over in the process, and has to make two attempts to self-right due to performing a full 720 the first time. This flipper is ridiculous! Sulphur isn�t moving, and Mercury has apparently lost one side of its drive as well as its weapon. This leaves Salt to fight pretty much alone. It keeps trying to doorstop TotF, but it just can�t get both of those big funnily-angled wheels off the ground. Tongue of the Fatman slowly manages to make its way to Mercury, and gets in another massive flip. Mercury is righted, but it stops moving entirely. With only one minibot working, Angry Goat Robotics wisely throws in the towel to avoid further damage, and retreats to the pits to reflect on the wisdom of attacking a bot which they knew probably had a better wedge and could one-shot them head-on. Your winner, by knockout in 1:10, is Tongue of the Fatman! Dysprosinator V.S Infrared [Syl] In the red square, we have Team Yellow Alert's drum/wedge/brick combo Infrared, and in the blue square, we have British Robotics' tracked brick Dysprosinator. The box is locked, the lights are on, it's robot fighting time! The two bots charge out of their starting squares, guns blazing, and Infrared is facing backward, hoping to hit Dysprosinator with it's wedge and patented Team Yellow Alert ABR Forks. As expected in a wedge fight, the also-patented ARC protractor comes into good use, as Dysprosinator attempts to angle in on the slower Infrared, and gets under Infrared's side! Dysprosinator proceeds to plow it into the pulverizers, attempting to lift it up, but Infrared J-Hooks off, and floors it backward, drum facing at Dysprosinator, which Infrared hopes to pin and fling it! And hoo boy, that's sure a pin, and a fling indeed! Infrared gets lucky and manages to get a few more pins and flings on Dysprosinator, and after 3-4 flings, manages to self right, and is back in on the action, and seems to have taken up the aggression side takes a few pins in on Infrared, and gets a couple of lifts in. It's like this for the rest of the match, but Infrared gets some more pins n' flings, and the lifty boy of Dysprosinator plows Infrared into the pulverizers, and the buzzer sounds--and this match is off to the judges! Damage: 6-9 Infrared Control: 6-8 Infrared Aggression: 9-6 Dysprosinator Your winner, on a 25-21 Judges Decision, is Infrared! Doomerang 3 V.S Hati And Skoll [Mole55] Hati and Doomerang come out of the starting boxes, and then the obvious happens: a collision. Doomerang glances off and keeps spinning. This leads to a long game of cat-and-mouse in which Doomerang glances off without stopping and then gets chased by Hati. This goes on for about a minute, until Hati finally gets Doomerang near a wall, allowing Lexan to grind Doomerang to a halt, and then bring Skoll in to get a decent hit on one of the non-thwacky bits of Doomerang, doing no serious damage, but looking nasty, which dislodges Doomerang, allowing Doomerang to spin up again. Hati then goes to intercept Doomerang, and then the obvious happens: a collision. Doomerang glances and keeps spinning. This leads to a long game of cat-and-mouse in which pretty much the same thing as last time. And then again, until the buzzer goes off. Judges� Decision: Damage: Hati and Skoll 10, Doomerang 5 Aggression: Hati and Skoll 12, Doomerang 3 Control: Hati and Skoll 10, Doomerang 5 Your winner, by a 32-13 Judges� Decision, is Hati and Skoll! No Excuses Division Death Metal V.S Trial And Error [HFL] All right, Death Metal comes out of its starting square and gets up to speed, but just barely. Trial and Error comes out aggressively, charging right into that spinning bar with its rear� front� fuck it, it uses its plow on the side with the hammer. And Death Metal goes flying through the air, tumbling out of control! There�s a gash in the plow of Trial and Error, but Death Metal�s bar is stopped! T&E gives chase, and brings down the hammer, punching a big hole in the top armor plate over the weapon supports of Death Metal� and in fact goes so deep that its head gets hit by the bar. Said bar has barely gotten started spinning again, though, so it gets stopped. And� great, both bots are trying to drag each other around, but Death Metal isn�t spinning and T&E isn�t retracting its hammer. Unstick time� �Aaaand we�re back! Death Metal is now sans the front top armor plate because it had to be taken off and got bent in the process of prying it off of T&E�s axe, but there wasn�t anything under there anyway besides maybe the weapon chain. Said weapon chain is very much intact, and Death Metal wastes no time getting back up to speed as soon as the buzzer sounds. T&E chases it, but DM manages to spin up, and it whacks T&E on the plow again, opening up another gash. It knocks both bots across the arena again, and gets popped into the air, but doesn�t flip over this time, and is able to stay mobile and keep the bar spinning. Another hit flips Death Metal over, but Trial and Error can�t really capitalize on that, and now DM is actually hitting the plow higher up. Trial and Error is doing well so far to keep Death Metal on the defensive, but it can�t seem to get a chance to put that hammer to work. And that plow can�t hold up forever. Trial and Error comes in again, trying to turn to deflect Death Metal towards the nearby pulverizer, but this ends up letting Death Metal catch the side of its plow! And BANG! Both robots are sent flying across the arena! Death Metal bounces off the lexan, blade-first, which is sure to piss off the brits on the OOTA Discord. In hindsight maybe that wedge wall isn�t the best idea. But it�s still spinning, and there�s something white venting from Trial and Error! There are two possibilities, and neither of them is good. The bot is still moving though, so it seems like it�s CO2, and honestly it�s been mostly fighting as a wedge anyway. However, Death Metal is emboldened by neutralizing its opponent�s hammer, and attacks more aggressively, tearing up T&E�s plow more and more, and finally getting another massive hit that nearly rips the plow off, and stops the hammerbot in its tracks. Your winner, by knockout in 2:07, is Death Metal! Crosscut V.S America Offline [HFL] Crosscut cruises out of its starting square, spinning up the discs and heading off to the side, but the inertia of those two massive angled weapons accelerating actually spins the entire robot around clockwise! And America Offline is already halfway across the arena, going right in for a full box rush, but Crosscut regains control just in time and manages to duck behind the killsaws. America Offline drives around, but by then Crosscut is up to full speed and has a disc pointed at it. Now Crosscut advances, but AO backs off, not wanting to get hit by that weapon, and tries to get to the side of Crosscut. It manages it, and shoves Crosscut into the side of the arena. The red disc hits the wedge wall, grinding against it with a huge shower of sparks and a horrible noise. It stops after a few seconds, leaving a huge area of dented and de-painted wall panel and AO holds Crosscut there until the pin timer runs out. But thanks to Crosscut�s unusual weapon drivetrain using a differential, the blue disc is still at full speed, and Pyro manages to bring it around and tag AO�s front scoop as it retreats. There�s a loud back and a deep scratch in the metal, but it seems to be only a glancing blow. Crosscut gets back up to speed, spinning itself around again, and America Offline goes back to trying to get to its side. But this time, the robots meet close to head-on, and Crosscut makes solid contact. What a hit! America Offline is sent spinning away with a gash in its scoop, but that curved shape has done its job. Crosscut�s disc is deflected upward and breaks the robot�s traction, but due to the angle of the disc it also spins the robot around at high speed. Meanwhile the disc that hit the wedge slows down, so the gyroscopic forces are no longer balanced. I think you can tell where this is going. Basically Crosscut sends itself flying, flips over, and hits the floor and launches itself across the arena, hitting the wall before it finally gets back on its wheels. Oh, and the floor�s dented now, too. Good luck with that, low ground clearance middleweights!" America Offline charges right after Crosscut, ramming it just after it self-rights. This time it gets the fabled �one-two,� but only because the discs are at half speed tops, and it doesn�t appear to have done more than scratch AO�s wedge. This also lets AO stop the blue disc a second later and ram Crosscut into the spike strip. The impact knocks it free, though, and it�s able to evade AO long enough to get up to its terrifying full speed. The fight pretty much continues like this for a while; there�s no evidence whatsoever of America Offline�s hammer, but it�s still the aggressor fighting as a wedgebot. It does its best to get to the sides of Crosscut, but Crosscut is making it very difficult, and AO has to take several more hits on the wedge. More holes are torn in the scoop, but every full-speed hit throws Crosscut into the air and makes it spin out of control, and AO does a good job of using this to force Crosscut into the walls or hazards. It finally gets to the side of Crosscut again, but at this point its scoop isn�t quite level, and it actually rides up Crosscut�s little side wedglets and force-feeds its plow right into the descending side of the blue disc. The disc comes to a stop with a tremendous crash, and AO sheepishly backs away with the tip of its wedge even more torn up and curled down. It is now visibly nowhere near flush with the floor, and in fact it�s at risk of the tip getting caught if it�s forced to attack Crosscut head-on again. But Crosscut�s blue disc remains stationary � it�s hard to see what happened since it has guards over the belts, but I wouldn�t be surprised if a hit like that snapped them! Crosscut is now down to its red disc, but the gyroscopic forces aren�t balanced anymore, and it doesn�t seem to be able to turn as easily. AO does its best to avoid the red disc entirely, but it can�t get under the sides anymore, and is ultimately forced to attack the �front� of the spinner again. But they gyroscopic forces cause Crosscut to tilt enough that even the damaged wedge can get under it, and it�s bounced away without causing too severe damage. AO pursues it and gets stuck on the side wedgelets again, making contact with the stopped blue disc, but it can�t push Crosscut anywhere with its front wheels in the air, and the match time runs out before the pin timer does. Judges� Decision: Damage: Crosscut 10, America Offline 5 Aggression: Crosscut 6, America Offline 9 Strategy: Crosscut 5, America Offline 10 Your winner, by a 24-21 Judges� Decision, is America Offline! Highland Fling V.S Dock Leaf 2 [Syl] In the red square, we have Team Trihunter's attack-skirted melty Highland Fling, and in the blue square, we have the North-West Shed's melty thwack Dock Leaf 2. Let the bot battle begin! Highland Fling spins up, as Dock Leaf 2 attempts to box rush, with it's speed control active. Due to the centrifugal forces of Highland Fling, it's "Attack Skirts" push outwards, and hits Dock Leaf 2 head-on! Highland Fling and Dock Leaf 2 both get sent flying across the arena, Highland Fling ricocheting around like an air hockey puck from hell. Dock Leaf 2 gets back in control in time, and Riley flips off the speed control, and goes melty! Now, there isn't really all that much to say here, except that the two bots do hit eachother and go ricocheting around, and Riley sometimes goes from melty to artificially speed-lowered, and gets some decent control in on Highland Fling. Unfortunatley, Dock Leaf 2 can't get much bite in on Highland Fling due to the fact that Highland Fling's shape is the way it is. Dock Leaf 2 gets a good pin on Highland Fling at the wedge walls, but the buzzer sounds before the pin timer counts out, and this match is off to the judges. Damage: 7-8 Dock Leaf 2 Control: 7-8 Dock Leaf 2 Aggression: 7-8 Dock Leaf 2 Dock Leaf 2 wins on a 24-21 decision! -- Roleplay deadline is *Sunday, December 24th, 2017!* Get your roleplays in! Edited by Hooray For Lexan, Jan 23 2018, 01:01 PM.
	TEAM FOXTROT UNIFORM Thunderstryke - New Blood Tournament Semi-Finals Neophyte Redglare - Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Quarter-Finals America Offline - Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Quarter-Finals -- Ruination 4 Mushroom Cloud: 6-1 Biological Warfare: 1-6 America Offline: 2-4 (5-9 total) Space Cadet: 5-2 -- Robo*Con Neophyte Redglare: 1-1 (7-9 total) -- "I'm curious what tactical advantage you're hoping to gain by sacrificing a portion of your bots size/weight for a deployable banana" -NWOWWE 2017 "@That Kode Guy this man just threatened to enact biological warfare on your cartoon wife" -V900 2018


Sylandrophol	Jan 3 2018, 09:15 PM Post #3
They/Them Posts: 382 Group: Members Member #100 Joined: September 25, 2012	WEEK 2 FIGHT CARDS/WRITE CARDS With the threat of warm mayo being poured over my head, i am getting this shit up. -- Middleweight Biological Warfare Division Incredible Dawg Adventure V.S Ikea's Guard Dog [Syl] Well, talk about a 'Dog Fight'... ...although, it's a kinda boring fight. Both bots zip out of their squares and it doesn't take long to see who has the better control ratio. IGD constantly harasses and angles in under IDA and takes and slams IDA into walls and hazards several times. Nintendo Duck Hunt dawg does manage to capitalize a few times when IGD got a bit careless with his driving, but not enough to turn the tide of this battle. This will go to a judges' decision. Damage: 8-7 IGD Aggression: 9-6 IGD Strategy: 8-7 IGD Your winner, with a 25-20 decision, is Ikea's Guard Dog! Neophyte Redglare V.S Nuclear Plague XL [~~Shaba~~ HFL] Nuclear Plague XL spins up, Neophyte Redglare approaches somewhat cautiously, wary of that nasty drum. It tries to get to the side of Nuclear Plague, but NP spins towards it and smacks it. Neophyte Redglare gets thrown onto its back. Nuclear Plague comes in and tries to hit its backside, but Redglare fires its flipper just in time, self-righting and catapulting itself out of reach. However, it still has to scramble to escape taking another hit from its opponent�s drum. After a bit of circling, Redglare gets under Nuclear Plague, but can�t get under far enough for a good flip. Nuclear Plague gyrodances away, and retaliates by launching Redglare into the air again. Redglare is now aware that its wedge isn�t able to get under Nukeplague from the front, but it�s not quite able to outmaneuver it. After taking two more hits it finally gets to its side and gets a flip in, but Nuclear Plague�s drum just bounces it back onto its wheels. And now it�s Nuclear Plague�s turn to flip Redglare over, and this time it is quick enough to get a shot on the side of the machine, disrupting its self-righting and overturning it again. Redglare lands on its side with its flipper extended. It slowly retracts, and spins madly with the two wheels contacting the ground, but isn�t able to full self-right before Nuclear Plague spins back up and gets a huge hit on its rear end! There go some pieces of wheel! Redglare is finally upright again, but not driving quite as well, and it still doesn�t have a way of getting past Nuclear Plague�s drum. The front wedge is getting more and more torn up, and it just keeps getting tossed around until one hit puts it on its back again, and it doesn�t self-right at all. One back wheel is contacting the ground, and it has enough traction to slowly spin the robot around, but that isn�t controlled translational movement. Nuclear Plague accidentally gives Redglare a reprieve by righting it, but it�s not long before it gets overturned again, and this time Nuclear Plague hangs back and lets it be counted out. Your winner, by knockout in 2:25, is Nuclear Plague XL! Valravn V.S Boring Brown Wedge [HFL] All right, well, this is� basically a wedge fight. Both bots come out fast with no need to spin up weapons, and immediately get to circling and ramming and trying to push each other around. Boring Brown Wedge tries to circle around the side of Valravn, but exposes its own side in the process and Valravn gets under it and immediately turns it on its side. BBW�s invertible, though, and doesn�t really care. It gets underneath one of the corner spikes of Valravn, and pushes it almost into the wedge all, but Valravn gets away. There�s a lot of back-and-forth pushing action, but it�s mostly BBW doing the pushing. Valravn�s wedge was a problem in its last fight, and it seems to be hurting it again now: it can�t get underneath BBW in a direct frontal attack, and even when it does get under its sides BBW is slipper enough that it can�t do much besides turn it over and once get it smacked by the wall drum. Boring Brown Wedge, on the other hand, manages to pin Valravn a couple of times, and rams it into the killsaws and pulverizers. This bot lives up to its name as well as anything I�ve seen, but you�ve got to admit it�s effective. Judges� Decision: Damage: Boring Brown Wedge 8, Valravn 7 Aggression: Boring Brown Wedge 9, Valravn 6 Strategy: Boring Brown Wedge 11, Valravn 4 Your winner, by a 28-17 Judges� Decision, is Boring Brown Wedge! The Deliverer Division Stingray V.S Magica [~~Syl~~ Wolf5150] Magica comes out pretty aggressively. Looks like it's really eager to flip Stingray. Shame it's invertible. One flip and it's downhill from there. Stingray keeps knocking Magica an arm's length away with that bar. Stingray begins to reverse. Magica follows. PING! Magica gets sent away once more and is sent into the path of the saws, and at the worst time too. Hey cool. Magica lost a tread. Kinda hard to use mecanum shit when there's only three wheels, tracks, or whatevers. It's able to move a slight distance, but this time Stingray pushes it into the hammer and pins it there. The top gets pretty warped and soon, there's smoke coming out. Magica ain't moving. We know what that means... Stingray wins by KO (FF) in 1:47 Precise Saunter Mk. 3 V.S Glitch [HFL] Both robots start the match fairly aggressively, Glitch getting that frightening disc up to speed, Precise Saunter approaching and trying to circle around the side of Glitch. But Glitch easily spins to face it and lunges forward. Precise Saunter guns it in reverse, barely avoiding getting caught by the disc. And now, all of a sudden Glitch is the aggressor, and Precise Saunter is running away! Glitch has very thin armor, and is very vulnerable to Precise Saunter�s axe, so I think TBR was expecting Glitch to mount its plow to protect itself, and does not seem to have a plan to deal with the all-out aggression from the spinner. Or, at least, its plan is to try to avoid the spinner and attack Glitch�s sides, and it isn�t working so far. Both bots maneuver around, trying to line up a shot, but Precise Saunter can�t get in a position where it can commit to an attack without being hit itself. Finally it comes in at an angle, but the shaft of the hammer hits Glitch�s top hump and prevents the axe penetrating as deeply as it normally would. Glitch attempts to turn to get its disc into Precise Saunter�s front skirts, but can�t manage it until Precise Saunter�s axe retracts, and now Glitch darts forward again, and gets the hit it was looking for! Precise Saunter is thrown through the air, and lands upside-down with an entire pontoon nearly ripped off its front wedge! It starts to self-right, but Glitch isn�t done yet. It charges in again, getting its disc right under the left side of Precise Saunter. The axebot is flipped over again, and small pieces of metal and rubber are thrown across the arena. PS retracts its axe, flops onto its side partially, and self-rights again, but now it�s only moving in circles. Exit one shuffler pod! Glitch spins back up and tries to approach to finish Precise Saunter off, but now it�s the one trying to avoid its opponent�s weapon while PS tries to stay facing it. Glitch has done enough damage to potentially win, but not if they get overly aggressive and get knocked out by a stray axe blow. Precise Saunter knows they�re unlikely to win this without a knockout too, though, and finally takes a desperate swing with the axe and misses as Glitch hit�s the brakes. That�s Glitch�s chance to attack, and attack it does, tearing the front wedge of PS away completely and throwing it into the air again. Precise Saunter bounces back onto its feet, but it�s not moving. It wildly fires the axe back and forth, possibly trying to knock a loose wire back together, but with no effect. The countdown starts, and Glitch raises its lifter to vertical with the disc still going full tilt and spins in place until it flips onto its side, then retracts the lifter and slowly self-rights. That�s the best victory dance I�ve seen all event! Your winner, by knockout in 1:48, is Glitch! Chaotic Insurgency V.S Sekhmet [Shaba] Both bots head for the center of the arena; CI leading with his forks and lifter. Sekhmet notices this and right before the two bots meet up near the center of the arena, Sekhment hits the brakes and stops dead. This causes CI to zoom past him just a bit, but enough for Sekhmet to capitalize. That VS tears into the left side of CI and rips off the one wedgelet near the wheel and also the wheel itself! CI then swings that lifter arm around to try to prevent Sekhmet from doing any further damage to that wheel and manages to fend off that nasty VS, for now. Sekhmet retreats to avoid being flipped, but CI chases after him and manages to slide the front wedgelet under. He's got Sekhmet propped up on his back wheels while maneuvering the lifter into place, which ends up causing Sekhmet to reel away from CI. Sekhmet quickly regroups and charges for CI's front. The Tazbot clone maneuvers the lifter to try to predict where Sekhmet will attack, but even with the slower overall speed, Sekhmet is still pretty maneuverable. It gets another angle in on CI and manages to line up the front wedgelet right between hte weapon supports. It rides up it just a bit before that disc tooth makes impact. Oh, you'd think that wedgelet was made of cardboard, the way it just disintegrated from that impact! CI gets that lifter into place and under the front corner of Sekhmet, but the VS backs and turns slightly, slipping off and catching part of the lifter arm with its disc, causing Sekhmet to be knocked away a bit. CI's lifter doesn't appear to have taken damage from that impact, but it's clearly hobbling due to the earlier damage to the wheel, and now the front wedgelet is gone. Sekhmet charges again and doesn't seem to really care where CI has its lifter arm positioned. Both bots collide again, CI attempts to lift Sekhmet again, but the narrow surface area of the lifter doesn't do much other than repel Sekhmet for a moment. It does manage to chase Sekhmet and pin the VS against the arena wall using its powerful torque. But, just as the pin timer ends and CI backs away, Sekhmet sees an opening as CI skids a bit possibly due to the wheel damage and that disc sinks its single tooth into the right side of CI. OH, there goes a wheel. CI now desperately tries to fend off Sekhmet, but it's a bit too late for that, now. Armor has been ripped away and now it looks like the drive motor and gearbox are exposed, hanging out of that gaping wound. Sekhmet backs off some to wait for a countout. CI is moving, but not outside of it's turning radius. And we have the 10-count! Your winner, by KO in 2:12, is Sekhmet! -- Heavyweight Vomit Comet Division Infrared V.S Doomerang 3 [HFL] The green light has barely come on and Doomerang is already spinning in a red and black blur. That nine-wheel drive sure is effective! But it�s still a melty and can only translate out of its square so fast. Infrared has plenty of time to get its own weapon up to speed. They approach and meet in the middle of the arena, and both bots just charge into each other without any fear! Doomerang tries to juke sideways to catch Infrared�s drum supports, but it isn�t quick enough, and the two powerful spinners meet head on. Sparks fly, Infrared is knocked spinning away, and Doomerang is popped a couple feet in the air. But they both just get back up to speed and charge each other again! This is turning into a real spinner-on-spinner slugfest here. Both robots are just taking everything the other can dish out, and they aren�t showing any signs of slowing down. Infrared gets flipped over at some point, but it attacks Doomerang anyway, launching itself high into the air and self-righting in the process. Finally Infrared manages to knock Doomerang into the spike strips and pin it, but its drum is stopped. It backs up a couple feet, spins to point its rear wedge at Doomerang, and reverse back into it, but I don�t think it was prepared for just how quickly Doomerang can spin up. Doomerang pushes itself away from the wall with the force, tires squealing, and although it isn�t at full speed when Infrared rams it, it�s fast enough to deflect off the wedge and catch Infrared�s back left tire! The impact knocks Doomerang back away from the wall, but sends it over the killsaws in the process. Infrared is back up to speed now, but that wheel looks bent and is dragging on the arena floor, and it can�t maneuver quite as easily as before. Both robots go back to trading blows, but after a little while something black goes flying out of Doomerang and ricochets off the arena wall before bouncing across the arena. What is that? It�s a tire! But Doomerang still has eight tires left, and it�s still spinning. And it stays spinning until time runs out, as does Infrared! Only when the weapons finally slow down does the damage they�ve caused become apparent. Doomerang has a tire missing from one of its outer wheels, some good-sized holes torn out of its top plate, and multiple bent teeth. Infrared has big chunks broken off its teeth as well, has the bad rear wheel, and the weapon support frame is slightly but visibly twisted sideways. And both the drum of Infrared and the outer surfaces of Doomerang�s wheel pods are riddled with dents and gashes. What a match, folks! The judges will have their work cut out for them! Judges� Decision: Damage: Infrared 7, Doomerang 3 8 Aggression: Infrared 8, Doomerang 3 7 Strategy: Infrared 7, Doomerang 3 8 Your winner, by a 23-22 split decision, is Doomerang 3! Hati And Skoll V.S Tria Prima [~~Syl~~ V900] Oh boy, a multibot fight! We haven't even started the match and I already want to blow my brains out right about now ngl The match starts and this imminent trainwreck looks more like a Pokemon fight rather than a robot combat one. HFL goes "Hati! I choose YOU!" while Gabe opts to send out some minibots with a whopping THREE speed. This is why you lost to Tongue of the Fatman. Anyway, Gabe's minibots tagteam Hati pretty well. Their sharp wedges do a good job of sliding between Hati's fang-wedgelets, but Hati is no Sylandro bot with 0.0001 mm of ground clearance under it. It manages to yank itself off and shoves a minibot aside, but not before the other minibot comes in to be a nuisance. Those three tussle around for a bit while the big boys get spun up and trudge toward the action. Since Mercury is quicker, it gets there first, resulting in a Mercury vs Hati standoff until Skoll gets off it's lazy ass and shows up. Now here's the thing, Gabe didn't tell me what the weight distro was between his 3 bots, so I can only assume it's something along the lines of 1/4, 1/4, 1/2 judging by the sizes of each bot in his robot picture. So for all intents and purposes, I'll interpret both bots to be roughly the same weight. Hati slides under with it's thinner wedges, but the minibots continue pestering Hati and shuffling it around. You know who else has finally showed up and starts pestering? Skroll. One of the minibots tries to pull a fast one and eats a dick for it because big fuckoff disc + 2 armor = LOL. Hati winds up getting hit by Mercury's drum and it takes... lemme check the stats of these bots again real quick... not a lot of damage! One of the fangs gets bent up a little bit, but that's about the extent of things. A few seconds of pussyfooting later, Skoll grabs Mercury by the front wedge ridges aaand it's over. Hati + Skoll (mostly Skoll) win by KO in 1:03 Tongue Of The Fatman V.S Dysprosinator [Shaba] Both bots start out of their squares; Dysprosinator charging for TotFM. Fatman then slows down as if he's expecting Dysprosinator to attempt a flanking maneuver to angle in. Fatman is having none of that. Those cambered, angled out wheels on Fatman help keep Dysprosinator from getting at his sides and the heavier front of Fatman is also able to get under the British trackbot. And we have liftoff! Dysprosinator has been launched several feet into the air. And what comes up, must come down (yay gravity!). It lands inverted, but the flipper of the Britbot manages to right itself, although a bit slowly. TotFM keeps to his strategy of letting Dysprosinator charge at him, but doing a great job at keeping the tracked lifter clamper from gaining any sort of leverage in this fight. Another few spectacular flips is all it takes for TotFM to keep the momentum going in this match. This goes the full 3 minutes and to the judges. Damage: 9-6 TotFM Aggression: 8-7 Dysprosinator Strategy: 9-6 TotFM Your winner with a 25-20 decision, is Tongue of the Fatman! No Excuses Division America Offline V.S Highland Fling [V900] Alright folks n fams the match starts with the usual buzzer going "BRRRRRRRRRRT" and America Offline jolts out of the square, careening toward Highland Fling (who's currently sitting in his square trying to spin up) at a breakneck pace. Sylandro then makes some very... interesting decisions. First off, he decides to "angle in" on HF, despite the fact that it's an omnidirectional melty thwack. This doesn't accomplish much besides waste a few seconds, but as long as AO doesn't fire the hammer, it'll be easy enough to just push HF into th- aaand he fires the hammer! It's only, what, 2 or 3 weapon points too few to do any real damage? But hey, whatever man. That's your choice and I respect it. Unfortunately, no amount of respect will get that hammer to damage HF. The so-called "attack skirts" smack AO's hammer and causes a very pretty-looking burst of sparks, but neither robot really receives much damage. Both robots get shunted in opposite directions, AO back toward its square and HF pings off a wall and skids to a stop right next to the wall-drum. Sylandro keeps up the pursuit, but HF is a very slippery bot, bouncing around the arena nearly as much as ASCIIbot 2* did. Occasionally HF gets the brunt of various arena hazards, but the damage is hardly noticeable. The same could be said for AO- HF is to slight denting of the top as AO is to minute cutting of the frontal armor plating. By the end of the match, both robots pretty clearly functyion just as well as they did before the match. Sylandro's game of pinball ceases when the 3 minutes of the match itself does. If you didn't that joke like some kind of pleb who didn't read the royal rumble 2018 result, just pretend I referenced NWOWWE's bot Rooster Teeth or something then. Damage: 8-7 Highland Fling Aggression: 10-5 America Offline Strategy: 8-7 America Offline America Offline wins by judge's decision, 35-10 Dock Leaf 2 V.S Death Metal* [HFL] Both bots get up to speed, Death Metal going for the center of the arena fairly quickly, Dock Leaf 2 drifting out with its melty brain drivetrain. Death Metal looks a little hesitant about approaching the thewackbot, but after getting a feel for how fast its opponent can move, the bar spinner moves in for an attack. Dock Leaf 2 tries to strafe sideways to avoid that bar, but it�s nowhere near quick enough, and GOOD GRIEF! That didn�t last long at all! Dock Leaf�s hammer goes flying across the arena on the very first blow, putting a nice scratch in the Lexan. Both robots are still technically spinning though, and they clash again, this time sending pieces of steel tubing flying around the arena. Death Metal knocks itself over the killsaws, but the bar is in the way of actually firing the hazard. Meanwhile Dock Leaf has stopped spinning after being thrown into the wedge wall, and the entire thwacking tail has been reduced to a few mangled, twisted bits of metal. It zips away from the wall, now driving as a wedgebot, and actually manages to get to the side of Death Metal with its incredible speed, but Death Metal just turns and brings its bar right into the side of Dock Leaf! Oh the humanity! Sparks fly along with chunks of tire and wheel and drive motor! Dock Leaf�s wedge has been peeled away from its front like a sticker on a piece of cheap furniture, and the right side panel, along with what looks to be half of its drivetrain, has been sprayed across the arena. There�s no movement from Dock Leaf 2, and Death Metal spends the countdown knocking pieces of shrapnel around the arena while it spins down, then drives back to its starting square. It�s had reliability problems in the past, but now we are looking at a truly frightening machine from Team Stealth. Your winner, by knockout in 0:42, is Death Metal! Trial And Error V.S Crosscut [Syl] Crosscut's driver forgets which side is the front and reverses into the wall at the start of the fight, simultaneously snapping its own weapon belts and fucking up the kickplate and causing the match to be stopped to repair the arena. Trial and Error is awarded the win based on damage points, and because we're just getting sick of Crosscut damaging the arena at this point. (Trial and Error wins by Forfeit) -- Roleplay deadline is Sunday, January 7th, 2018! Get your roleplays in! Edited by Hooray For Lexan, Feb 3 2018, 10:53 PM.
	TEAM FOXTROT UNIFORM Thunderstryke - New Blood Tournament Semi-Finals Neophyte Redglare - Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Quarter-Finals America Offline - Robot Fight Night: Season 1 Quarter-Finals -- Ruination 4 Mushroom Cloud: 6-1 Biological Warfare: 1-6 America Offline: 2-4 (5-9 total) Space Cadet: 5-2 -- Robo*Con Neophyte Redglare: 1-1 (7-9 total) -- "I'm curious what tactical advantage you're hoping to gain by sacrificing a portion of your bots size/weight for a deployable banana" -NWOWWE 2017 "@That Kode Guy this man just threatened to enact biological warfare on your cartoon wife" -V900 2018


V900	Jan 17 2018, 07:06 PM Post #4
Rubber Duck Enthusiast Posts: 536 Group: Members Member #86 Joined: September 16, 2011	Sylandro's run away from this like your run-of-the-mill deadbeat dad, so I'm taking it over by force. I'll accept this as consent to do so. Didn't bother giving me access to edit the challonge bracket, so I made my own: Spoiler: click to toggle MW: HW: Your week 3 matches are listed there, the deadline of which is the 27th. I'll do the last few weeks of groups and then hand the tourney off to Shaba or HFL for the last round robin while I get started on RoboCon. Aight lads? Edited by V900*, Jan 28 2018, 04:22 PM.



V900	Jan 28 2018, 04:27 PM Post #5
Rubber Duck Enthusiast Posts: 536 Group: Members Member #86 Joined: September 16, 2011	Write card time: Biological Warfare Division Nuclear Plague XL vs Incredible Dawg Adventure [HFL] Nuclear Plague XL starts to spin up its drum and moves out of its starting square, but Incredible Dawg Adventure - BY GAWD IS THAT A BOX RUSH? I haven't seen one of those in ages! It just charges right across the arena, straight for Nuclear Plague! It pushes its lifter into the ground before impact, which would ordinarily make it fairly easy for Nuclear Plague to swerve out of the way, but either Nuclear Plague wasn't expecting such a fast charge or it was confident in its wedge, because it just takes it head-on. IDA's lifting plow gets underneath, and the force of the collision pretty much just throws Nuclear Plague into the air. It comes down sideways and nearly tips over, but ends up on its wheels. A few feet away, IDA piledrives itself into the spike strip with enough force to ripple the lexan. This puts IDA with its back to its opponent, and Nuclear Plague tries to go for a hit on its wheels, but IDA backs away from the wall and squares up with its plow again. This time it doesn't have time to press it into the ground, though, and Nuclear Plague is able to slide underneath it and pop IDA into the air. It hits the wall, slides down, and lands beached on the spike strip. Its high ground clearance and the lifter let it get down safely, but as it does so NP gives it another smack, this time to the side of the wedge. It's tossed a full 540 degrees and lands upside-down. Nuclear Plague continues to give chase, and IDA has to, to put it bluntly, run away to self-right. At this point Nuclear Plague seems to be on top, but its drum hasn't done any damage whatosever to the very durable plow of IDA. IDA also wastes no time in sliding said plow underneath Nuclear Plague's wedge again the next time the bots meet. It starts to raise the lifter, but Nuclear Plague manages to reverse off it. IDA backs off and lowers its plow, but in the meantime Nuclear Plague is trying to get to the side of IDA. IDA easily spins to face it, but again Nuclear Plague gets underneath it and pops it in the air as well as flipping it over. It tries to go for the now-exposed rear of the bot, but IDA brings the lifter around overhead, and now its wedge is actually the right way up facing backwards. After a bit of circling it gets underneath Nuclear Plague, and starts pushing it towards the pulverizer! Nuclear Plague spins away again, but IDA raises the lifter and the combination of the lift and the gyroscopic forces flip the drumbot over. Initially it faceplants, but the weapon kicks it onto its back. Now it's much harder for it to maneuver, but it manages to point its drum at IDA (now self-righted) again. IDA rams it, which rights Nuclear Plague, but leaves it facing backwards, and IDA just keeps coming, getting under the rear of Nuclear Plague and slamming it into the wedge wall at high speed! Both bots go flying, both end up back on their wheels. There's a few more fairly inconsequential hits, but finally Nuclear Plague manages to get the followup hit it's looking for, smacking an inverted IDA in the underside as it self-rights! The drum tears a pair of diagonal gashes in the face of the pixelated dog on IDA's top plate, and removes the tread from its left front wheel. First real damage goes to Nuclear Plague. Incredible Dawg Adventure is undeterred, and continues with its strategy of charging Nuclear Plague. It gets underneath it again and flips it over, but again Nuclear Plague self-rights against its opponent's wedge. But then, Incredible Dawg adventure makes the mistake of pressing its lifter just a couple degrees too far. It gets under Nuclear Plague all right, but its chassis is tilted back far enough that the tips of its less heavily-armored lifter jaws peek out above the top of the plow, which means that they get fed straight into Nuclear Plague's drum. Bang! The top jaw of Incredible Dawg Adventure flies back 180 degrees and ends up resting on top of the chassis, with the linkage ripped completely free of the cylinder. The lower jaw is shredded and bent way upward, and from the angle the ram can't be intact either. But Nuclear Plague's drum grinds against the torn panel and comes to a stop, and IDA slams it backwards into the wall drum. Nuclear Plague somersaults forward and ends up on top of IDA. IDA reverses, and its wheels toss Nuclear Plague off. Incredible Dawg Adventure may not have been using its jaws, but that is major damage, and not just from the judges' perspective. The damaged lower jaw is now permanently in the path of Nuclear Plague's drum, but when IDA tries to flip itself over and use the plow backwards, the mangled upper jaw partially high-centers it and gets caught on seams in the arena floor. There's not much it can do besides ram, which it does despite getting the lower jaw even more shredded, but it finally pushes Nuclear Plague over the killsaws... and NP's drum stops! Two robots with severe damage to their weapons, with just twenty seconds left in the fight! It goes to the judges after some halfhearted shoving, and this one could be tricky to call. Both robots were very aggressive, both caused serious damage to each other, and both of their strategies kinda sorta worked. Judges' Decision: Damage: Incredible Dawg Adventure 3, Nuclear Plague XL 12 Aggression: Incredible Dawg Adventure 9, Nuclear Plague XL 6 Strategy: Incredible Dawg Adventure 8, Nuclear Plague XL 7 Your winner, by a 25-20 Judges' Decision, is Nuclear Plague XL! Ikea's Guard Dog vs Valravn [~~Wolf~~ V900] Idk why w0lf flaked on writing this match, because it's pretty one-sided. Pressing lifter-wedge vs 4wd static wedge, man I wonder how this'll play out. But yeah... to say things don't go in Valravn's favor is a gross understatement. This thing ends up visiting damn near ALL of the hazards in the arena. Pulverizer, wall drum, you name it. Been there, done that, didn't get the t-shirt but did get some nasty dents in the armor. Valvravn does a relatively good job of playing the defensive and j-hooking off when needed, but has no real way of taking control. Wallslams, killsaw run-ins and pulverizer pulverizations do a number to Valravn's chassis as the match goes on, though. Those self-righting spikes get bent to all heck, with several of them ending up crooked by over 60 degrees. Ikea's Guard Dog accidentally rams into the wall spikes a couple of times like a total DUMBASS... but that's small beans compared to the several slices Valravn has. It's internals seems to start being whittled away from the various impacts as well, as some light smoke puffs out from between the plating. The drive seems a bit slow too, but it's definitely still able to move. For now, at least. Things go from bad to worse when one of the wheels gets shredded up by a killsaw, thanks to IGD doing it's usual business. If it's mobility was mildly questionable before, it's a definite issue now. Another delivery to the wall knocks out a drive motor and beaches Valravn up onto the spikes. Seeing as it's unable to get off, a quick 10-count gets this match over and done with. Ikea's Guard Dog wins by KO in 2:29 Neophyte Redglare vs Boring Brown Wedge [FF] Sylandro bashes Boring Brown Wedge with a hammer an hour before the match, hence rendering it unfit to fight. Neophyte Redglare wins by KO in -60:21 The Deliverer Division Precise Saunter Mk.3 vs Stingray [FF] Stingray transforms into a literal stingray and jabs PSm3 to death with it's stinger. Stingray wins by KO in 0:05 Magica vs Chaotic Insurgency [V900] Shoutout to both guys for not telling me what setups they're using. Let's assume that: -Chaotic Insurgency is using it's non-plow setup -Magica is using it's regular setup Wedge fight time! CI tries his hardest to get the slip, but Magica is able to drift the, like, 2 degrees necessary to bypass CI's frontmost wedge. The lightweight hinged wedges easily flop up onto Magica's pressing plow wedge, which soon raises up and causes CI to tumble over. It tries to self-right, but Magica shoves it to the pulverizer and BAH GAWD KING! We're making robot pancakes tonight! The chassis receives some pretty significant dents in the dozen seconds CI takes to escape. The drive seems mostly undamaged, as it curves around back to the center of the arena. The turret is another story, making some rattling noises as it swivels around at a less-than-average speed. Magica tries this again but gets momentarily upended by CI's turret-fork, before getting lifted up about 45 degrees. Magica gets swung around all like "so long gay bowser" by the turret when Wolf tries to position it before sliding riiight into the saws. Minor gashing opens up on a couple of the treads in a drive-by sawing. While it doesn't cause an immediate KO like Wolf had hoped, it seems to slow Magica down a little bit. Back-and-forth shoving ensues between the two crippled robots, with CI mostly getting the upper hand as the match goes on (although it doesn't get any complete flips in) due in part to Magica's state and its angling becoming more predictable. CI winds up getting screwed over again by Magica. This time around, Magica musters up a half-decent wallslam. While it's visually impressive, not a lot of damage is truly done to CI. The Tazbot wannabe pushes itself off the wall and trips Magica up once again before the timer buzzes. Was that enough to convince the judges? Let's see! Damage: 9-6 Magica Aggression: 8-7 Chaotic Insurgency Strategy: 8-7 Magica Magica wins by judge's decision, 24-21 Glitch vs Sekhmet [Shaba] Both bots start out of their respective squares, Sekhmet looking to be the slightly faster of the two. Sekhmet then begins to arc around Glitch, trying to get that good angle of attack. Glitch takes notices and takes up a more defensive stance, keeping that front facing Sekhmet. Sekhmet shows his aggression and goes in for the first hit. Glitch meets the impact with his weapon and the two VS's are flung away from each other. Sekhmet recovers first and moves in toward Glitch, who's knocked inverted. He's back on his wheels, but Sekhmet goes in for a hit just as Glitch is back upright. OH, there goes the whole right-front corner of Glitch! What a vicious hit and Sekhmet is going in for the kill, now! OHHH, and Glitch goes flying-and comes to a rest atop the wedge wall. And, it's smoking...and not moving. This match is OVER! Your winner, by KO in 1:11, is Sekhmet! ---- Vomit Comet Division Hati and Skroll vs Infrared [Shaba] Both bots start up, Infrared approaches the center of the arena while Hati takes the lead and looks to meet IR, while Skoll spins up that powerful HS, while keeping behind Hati. Infrared is looking to get around Hati and attack the slower Skoll, but Hati looks to have a bit of a speed advantage and it's there, harassing IR. Infrared is meeting Hati with its back wedge, trying to get under. Neither of the two seem to be getting the upper hand over the other, and Skoll just hangs back, waiting. Infrared is the heavier robot, of course, but is clearly having trouble getting under Hati's wedge. After a few more seconds of Hati and Infrared's posturing, Hati manages to slip under IR's wedge and starts pushing IR towards Skoll, who has been waiting ever so patiently; wow, Hati must be running Ampflows, with that kind of pushing power! Infrared does manage to back off of Hati's wedge and retreats somewhat to avoid any impact with Skoll's blade. Hati is back on the attack and is just not letting Infrared any chance of angling around it. There's one more minute left in this match and IR backs up a little-he looks like he's trying to trick Hati into guessing his path of attack. IR begins to lead wedge-first. Hati reacts to counter IR while Skoll remains behind Hati for protection. Both Hati and IR close in on each other. IR then veers to the right, away from where Skoll is. Hati reacts, but was not quite expecting IR to turn to the right. That miniscule hesitation causes Infrared to angle into Hati and catch its side under its rear wedge, with the lifting forks raising Hati further off the ground. Hati has nowhere to go now and Infrared starts pushing it towards Skoll. Skoll turns and tries to avoid commiting fratricide, but it's way too slow. IR plows Hati into it and even though Skoll's spinner isn't facing Hati, the impact causes the much lighter bot to swing around. Add gyroscopic forces to that, and Skoll's blades meet Hati's side. OUCH! Armor, along with a drive motor and a wheel, are ripped away from Hati. Skoll's weapon is stopped now, and IR goes for the kill....but there's the buzzer and this match is over! Let's see what the judges think. Damage: 10-5 Infrared Aggression: 8-7 H&S Strategy: 8-7 Infrared Your winner, by a 25-20 Judge's decision, is Infrared! Doomerang 3 vs Tongue of the Fatman [Wolf] Doomerang spins up almost immediately. Fatman shitcircles his way towards the saws. Doomerang nearly meets him there. Dylan sees the saws and says fuck that and goes around it in order to his those tiny juicy...uh...wedgelets? yeah Noah removed those. Fatman turns to keep the hit frontal. CLANG! Sparks, both robots getting sent backwards, but no damage. Doomerang goes for another hit. Same result, except this time Fatman has a nice little scrape on his face. Another hit sends Doomerang partly on the wedge of Fatman. However, the wedge is pretty steep, so Badnik is able to turn those three wheels a bit to slide off. Just as he was doing so, Noah went for a flip. However, said flip didn't gain much purchase on the opponent. Doomerang gets flipped a decent amount, but not with the airtime we know and love, while Fatman sends itself upward and on it's back with the power of it's weapon. It attempts a self right, arching UP....and over. By the time it does, Doomerang is already up to full speed and heading straight for TotF again. Two smacks on the front, but it just sends Doomerang upward a bit and away from the Fatman. Fatman makes a huge turn but Doomerang aims for that side, causing Doomerang to slide up and skip high in the air. Teeth hit the ground and then lands on it's back (or top?), with another missed flip by Fatman. The two continue to clash, with Doomerang getting next to no damage. However, Tongue of the Fatman is having trouble with having less mobility options and is having trouble getting a good flip in. Eventually the match ends with both bots looking just fine. Aggression: 10-5 Doomerang Damage: 8-7 Tongue of the Fatman (due to getting at least two decent flips compared to the itty bitty scratches on the flipper) Strategy: 8-7 Doomerang Your winner by 24-21 decision is Doomerang 3! Tria Prima vs Dysprosinator [V900] Ok so real talk, I don't even know what's going on with Dysprosinator's description. Apparently it can only go up but can ALSO go down? Lifters going in two directions you say? Now ain't that fancy like me grandma's jalopy! That being said, both robots do their thing. Gabe lets Mercury sit behind his two minibots while Dys gets a pair of multibots aimed directly at it. Dys is more than fast enough to clamp down on at least one of them, and starts to bring it over to the killsaw. Unfortunately for TBR, this leaves him open for the other to swooce right in and peck at Dys' side. One of the treads gets lifted off the ground, giving Mercury the chance to come in and pop Dys up into the air. Salt spills out of Dys' mouth, landing on the ground with a resounding "thud" and accompanied by a few holes poked into Dys' side skirts. TBR goes right back after Salt to finish the job, and has a near-miss with Mercury while doing so. Sulphr tries to save Salt, but is both too late and too slow to do so. With Dys clamping back down on a minibot again, Salt pretty much gets instagibbed once put over one of the killsaws. Leaking LiPo juice turns to smoke, which turns into a small flame entirely caused by the friction of the sawblades. The same thing happens to Sulfur within the next half-minute, albeit with a wheel chewed in half instead of a battery-fire being started. Before long, it's just Dys vs Mercury with 1:30 left on the clock. Dys tries to outwedge Mercury, but immediately gets sent back flying, this time making a noticeable gouge on the edge of the front skirt. What results after this are two competitors awkwardly trying to get the edge on one another, despite both having no way of actually dominating the opponent. Dys can't get under because of it's inherently inferior hinged wedge, Mercury has a real tough time trying to reliably KO a fast 12 armored brick. What I'm trying to say, is that the last half of the match is a total chore to get through. Especially for the fans! In fact, they start throwing tomatoes! Not metaphorical tomatoes, but it looks like they're locked and loaded! Exclamation! Both drivers get totally coated in watery tomato juice by the time the match is over. Let's go to the judges Bill. Damage: 10-5 Dysprosinator Aggression: 8-7 Dysprosinator Strategy: 9-6 Tria Prima Tomatoes: 15-0 Audience Dysprosinator wins by a 24-21 judge's decision. P.S. I have no idea if I'm spelling Dysprosinator's name right or not. No Excuses Division Dock Leaf 2 vs America Offline [V900] BOX LOCKED LIGHTS ON FITE TIME!!!!1!11 Syl "angles in" and fires the weapon immediately or something dumb again, just like the last time America Offline fought a melty spinner. AO ends up getting swept a fair distance across the arena as a result. Some lads just never learn, huh? Second time proves to be the charm, however, as AO boxrushes Dock Leaf again at a much shorter distance. DL accumulates nicks and small dents on AO's front, but this hardly compares to what happens when AO plants a silver bullet-looking hammer into DL's top right as it tries to start spinning up. The hammer goes all the way in, effectively rendering DL's armor moot. Or rather, a lack of armor, given it's at 5 on a melty of all things. Either way, DL is up shit creek without a paddle while AO turns it into swiss cheese. DL tries to use the speed control and slide under AO's wedge to push it into some hazards, but does a sick-ass wheelie instead with that heavy hammer in the back being the main cause. A few more punches and the fight's over. GG no re America Offline wins by KO in 0:49. 55% of Sylandro's victory is taken by the DemSoc-run Norwegian government as taxation. Highland Fling vs Trial and Error [FF] Trial and Error do something humorous to make Highland Fling lose instantly or something. Trial and Error win by KO in 420:69 Death Metal vs Crosscut [HFL] This is the one you've been waiting for folks, the "don't sit in the front row" fight. Death Metal and Crosscut, the two most powerful spinners in the competition, facing off! Predictable, both bots get up to speed, and come out to meet each other somewhat tentatively. Not only do both bots have very powerful spinners, but they don't have much armor, so they really don't want to take a hit on anything but their own weapons. Actually, they don't want to get hit on their weapons either, particularly Death Metal, which has nonetheless put Crosscut on the defensive, circling and swooping around trying to get to the very exposed corners of its slower opponent. If Crosscut didn't have counterrotating discs canceling out the gyroscopic effect it would be in real trouble, but as it is it's able to keep the red disc pointed menacingly at its opponent. Death Metal finally comes in at a slight angle, seeming to be heading for Crosscut's right side, but then the horizontal spinner veers right, pivoting its bar towards the much larger exposed area on its opponent's left side. Crosscut starts to turn, and OH MY LORD WHAT A HIT! Death Metal rips into the left front corner of Crosscut, but the impact spins both bots around and brings Death Metal's bar straight into Crosscut's disc. Parts spray across the arena, and both robots are sent flying, flipping and tumbling out of control until they slam into the wall! There's smoke! There's fire! There's someone yelling "BREACH!" Stop the match! ...and we're back, folks. The fire's out, and it turns out the arena breach was a false alarm. The half of Crosscut's red disc that separated from the robot didn't go through the wall, but it hit right between two lexan panels so hard that the support beam is visibly bent outward. There's also a foot-long gash in the floor where Crosscut's other disc hit the floor after it flipped over. The robots are pretty messed up too. One of Death Metal's teeth is missing, the entire bar is BENT, and the frame got twisted so badly that the bar actually chopped through one of its own support tubes. There seem to be welds broken other places too. The chain is AWOL (somebody check the slots the killsaws come out of), and during its mad tumbling one wheel hit the floor so hard that the drive motor came free of its shock mounts and is now resting on the arena floor, still connected to the robot by one wire. But the other wheel is still moving, and that's more than can be said for Crosscut. It's lying on its side in the corner. A huge chunk of its frame and shell have been practically vaporized, the red disc is broken in half, half of the support tower for the red disc has been severed, and the other half is twisted. There are pieces of drive motor and battery all over the arena, and it turns out that when you actually rip a LiPo in half it's pretty spectacular. It's a good thing this was the last match of the day, because there are people taking an angle grinder to the arena wall right now, which means that'll take a while. Oh, and your winner, by knockout in 3:00, is Death Metal. It's 3:00 because apparently the cease button doesn't stop the match timer, but I'm pretty sure the hit happened somewhere around 30 seconds in. Have a good night, RFN fans! Edited by V900, Feb 4 2018, 05:37 AM.



V900	Jan 28 2018, 04:32 PM Post #6
Rubber Duck Enthusiast Posts: 536 Group: Members Member #86 Joined: September 16, 2011	Week 4 matches: Biological Warfare Division Boring Brown Wedge vs Ikea's Guard Dog [V900] >it's a "both guys submit one-sentence strategies" episode It can't be helped. Also, I'm assuming Mole is using his regular setup, because he didn't tell me which one he's using (again). Mole opts to "Press down, and push him into the hazards" (yes, that is his entire RP btw). Trihunter tries to go for Mole's sides but ends up getting flanked in the process, because trying to blindside a robot faster than you is definitely a good idea. IGD then proceeds to shove Brown Wedge to the windows, to the walls, till the sweat drip down my balls, but the adipose-ridden BBW is just too thick to be harpooned by a few blows from the pulverizers. By no means would it reflect well for Trihunter if this goes to a JD, but at least his bot is only slightly damaged from the umpteen-second-long hammering it takes. On the second try, Brown Wedge manages to slip under. Up and over the wedge IGD goes, ramping over to the other side of the arena like a Hotwheels car. Throughout the match, Boring Wedge gets under about 60% of the time while IGD gets under the other 40%. Due in part to both Mole's passive play and BBW's near-inability to be damaged, literally nothing worth mentioning happens in the last minute of the match. Yeah... let's just skip straight to the judge's decision. Damage: 12-3 Ikea's Guard Dog Aggression: 8-7 Ikea's Guard Dog Strategy: yea rite Ikea's Guard Dog wins by 20-10 Judge's Decision. Valravn vs Nuclear Plague XL [HFL] Nuclear Plague XL comes right out of its square with no fear, spinning its drum up quite quickly. Valravn also starts out aggressive though, and after a bit of maneuvering it comes right at Nuclear Plague's front end. Nukeplague has a very low front wedge though, and it slides under Valravn's pontoons - which have been giving it trouble all event - and uppercuts it right on the lifting spatula. The arm flies upward, but the compliance prevents the bot from really being thrown into the air. Instead it tilts back a bit, and lands belly-down right on top of Nuclear Plague's drum. There's a shower of white sparks and Valravn is tossed up over its opponent and bounces down behind it. Both bots spin around to face each other, and Valravn charges again, but Nuclear Plague's drum has been slowed down by those hits. It gets under Valravn again, but doesn't have enough energy to flip it over. Valravn pretty much stops the drum, but also ends up on top of it, and it doesn't have the ground clearance to move from there. Nuclear Plague slowly forces it towards the killsaws, but Valravn finally shakes itself free with its arm. Valravn doesn't seem phased at all, and its spatula doesn't even look bent. It goes on the attack again, but Nuclear Plague is able to avoid it long enough to get its drum up to speed again. It turns to meet a charge, and WHACK! This time Valravn is sent flying! It lands inverted; it immediately starts to self-right with the lifter, but Nuclear Plague hits it again, giving it another 540 flip and righting it. The second hit doesn't seem to have done anything since Nuclear Plague's drum was slowed down, but the first one bent Valravn's right pontoon upward a bit. And this kind of keeps repeating for a while. Valravn seems to be going for a full break his fist with your face strategy here, but it's not really working because this is current year and vertical spinners are powerful enough that they actually launch their opponents instead of just stopping. Valravn is getting tossed and smacked around because of this, and Nuclear Plague lands multiple followup hits including one right on the lifter arm. But it is actually putting Nuclear Plague on the defensive a decent bit, and it's standing up to the punishment extremely well, apart from its pontoons no longer even pretending to be flush with the ground. Valravn finally gets its spatula under the corner of Nuclear Plague, and the lifter flicks it up onto its back. The drum hits the ground, flipping Nuclear Plague and shooting it backwards, and the drum is slowed enough that Valravn's next charge stops it entirely! But again, Nuclear Plague's low wedge lets it just push Valravan into the wall, and pin it there. And a few hits later, the left side of Valravn's drive finally quits working, leaving it driving in circles under time runs out. A great effort, but I doubt it will be enough. Judges' Decision: Damage: Nuclear Plague XL 12, Valravn 3 Aggression: Nuclear Plague XL 5, Valravan 10 Strategy: Nuclear Plague XL 11, Valravn 4 Your winner, by a 28-17 Judges' Decision, is Nuclear Plague XL! Incredible Dawg Adventure vs Neophyte Redglare [HFL] Oh boy, yet another wedge fight. Long story short, unlike most lifters which can rest on the ground like they're hinged, Incredible Dawg Adventure's jaws have the top jaw's weight trying to close the jaws and the bottom jaw's weight trying to open them, which means the driver is constantly fighting to try to get them flush with the ground without lifting his own front wheels into the air. The result is that Neophyte Redglare actually gets under it quite a bit, either from sliding under the front or just getting to the side of the relatively narrow jaws. IDA can't seem to clamp onto Redglare's flipper since Redglare just fires it and gets away, but Neophyte Redglare's flipper performs... well, it performs how it always does. This means that the two robots do approximately diddly to each other for the two minutes of the fight, apart from Redglare flipping IDA a couple of times, and pushing it into the killsaws and tearing up one of its wheels up a bit. Two minutes in, though, Incredible Dawg Adventure's driver finally remembers it has another lifter, and IDA completely dominates the rest of the fight. Well, only one of the judges is still awake, and the other two look so peaceful, so we'll just leave them be. Judge's Decision: Damage: Incredible Dawg Adventure 2, Neophyte Redglare 3 Aggression: Incredible Dawg Adventure 3, Neophyte Redglare 2 Strategy: Incredible Dawg Adventure 2, Neophyte Redglare 3 Your winner, by a 9-6 Judge's (note the position of the apostrophe) Decision, is Neophyte Redglare! The Deliverer Division Sekhmet vs Magica [FF] whats-his-face eats an expired bean burrito and spends the entire match in the bathroom. Sekmet beats the crap out of Magica while the latter's builder is busy crapping out his spleen. Sekhmet wins by KO in 0:31.58345728502 Chaotic Insurgency vs Precise Saunter Mk.3 [Shaba] This match is underway and both bots start out of their squares towards the center of the arena. CI is the quicker of the two and they meet shy of arena center. CI looks to get that lifter arm under Precise Saunter, but PS has a powerful hammer and uses it. It comes down on that lifting arm, but doesn't seem to cause any damage. CI manages to lift PS and drive it to and up the wedge wall. Chaotic Insurgency then pins PS there, but PS fires its powerful hammer and wriggles free. It lands 2 hits on CI's 'head' and punctures clean through. Oh, looks like one of the LED 'eyes' has gone out. CI maneuvers the lifter to counter and lifts PS again, and once again, drives it to the opposite wall and into the drum. PS gets kicked up by the drum and lands inverted. It fires the hammer to self-right, but CI is right there with that lifter arm. It uses the same tactic, yet again, and slams PS into the wall behind its starting square. PS fires that hammer in aggression, catching CI a few more times. Oh, more holes into the Tazbot clone's brain. CI does back off now and PS drives over to near where the killsaws are. PS follows, but reluctantly, unsure of CI's tactics. PS then drives away, baiting CI to give chase. It does and CI catches up. PS turns just to the left of the killsaw slots, hoping to get CI to drive over them. CI stops short of the hazard, however. PS then comes around and charges CI while firing the hammer. CI has the lifter arm in position and blocks the blows from the hammer. Its lifter gets under PS again and off we go again. Chaotic Insurgency continues giving Precise Saunter MKIII a tour of the arena. This time to one of the corner hammers and PS gets a taste of its own medicine. PS, however, is getting increasingly frustrated and fires its hammer repeatedly. Some of the blows hits the arena hammer, and, oh my, looks like that's gonna have to be replaced after this match. More hammer blows rain down...on nothing, as CI has PS pinned. Pin timer is up and CI releases and retreats some while PS come charging after it like a bot possessed...and there's the buzzer! This one is going to the judges! Damage: 9-6 PS Aggression: 8-7 CI Strategy: 9-6 CI Your winner, by a 23-22 split decision, is Chaotic Insurgency! Stingray vs Glitch [FF] Glitch transforms into a literal stingray and jabs Stingray to death with it's stinger. Wait, what? Glitch wins in 0:05. ---- Vomit Comet Division Dysprosinator vs Doomerang 3 [W0lf] Doomerang spins up. Wait. Hold up. What the fuck is that noise? . Oh. It's Dysprosinator's motors going fucking nuts. Yeah, he's try to take out the big red spinny thing. Badnik doesn't get too far before he gets bitchslammed into Dys. Doomerang hits one of the wedge teeth, but it doesn't do so much as dent it slightly. Doomerang spins up again. Same result. After about five of these, Doomerang bounce into the wall. He begins to spin up again. Uh oh. Nevermind. Dysprosinator just got underneath. The teeth fit quite nicely into Doomsy's wheel pod. Doomerang gets sent into the saws, which struggle to deal much damage actually. Although he does get a pretty nasty hit on the very center, denting the top a bit. Dysprosinator ends it with a Growler style wall slam. Doomerang spins up again and tries to get some more juicy corners, and gets another hit on the teeth. Doomerang just can't deal much damage to the hardox wedge and weapon of Dysprosinator. The match ends with Dys clamping the melty again. Aggression: 9-6 Dysprosinator Damage: 8-7 Dysprosinator Strategy: 10-5 Dysprosinator Dysprosinator wins 27-18 Tongue of the Fatman vs Hati and Skroll [Shaba] The match begins and Hati advances, attempting to angle in on TotFM, while Skoll remains a good 10 feet behind Hati and it looks like Skoll won't be of too much use in this match. TotFM also starts out of its square, but the End of the Line, LLC power-flipper is heading over to where the wall drum hazard is. Hati does catch him halfway, and aggressively maneuvers to angle under TotFM's side. The flipper does a good job of countering and forces Hati to hesitate, not wanting to end up being launched. But, HfL then sees an opening and Hati gets under TotFM and pushes it into the wall drums. TotFM gets popped up and lands inverted on top of the drum, but immediately pops itself off with its flipper. However, it lands inverted again near the center of the arena, and Skoll is right there within a foot's reach. It comes in and pop, there goes TotFM's flipper again and I can't tell if Skoll's disk actually connected or not. TotFM does land on its wheels this time. Hati charges aggresively after it. TotFM goes back over to the wall drum again with Hati quickly in pursuit. Hati then charges a bit too aggresively and that flipper is there. WHOA, Hati gets LAUNCHED across the arena. TotFM then sees that Skoll is nearby and charges to it, hoping that Hati can't intercept beforehand. Hati had landed back on its wheels and here it comes charging from across the arena. TotFM has Skoll lined up, and OH! Hati charges in right when TotFM and Skoll connect, head-on. All 3 bots are flung back. TotFM not as much so as the pair of Hati and Skoll. Skoll is sent into the lexan and comes to rest under a corner hammer, and it comes down on it twice before Skoll can move away. I't also taken some damage to its drive, and is barely inching along now. Hati looks like it took a blow from its partner's disk and is now sporting a nasty gash on its plow. One minute left in this match and Hati and TotFM are once again maneurvering in on each other. I think whatever happens here will help decide this match. Skoll is all but dead near the corner, still. Hati makes some quick angles on TotFM, but that flipper bot's angled wheels keep it on its toes. Frustrated, Hati goes in, aiming for just beyond the flipper of TotFM, it gets under. POP goes the flipper. Even though Hati wasn't on the flipper part, the sheer force jerks the entire robot and the much lighter Hati gets pushed back a bit. Hati is not deterred and charges again at TotFM...and there's the buzzer! Oh, this is going to be a tough one for the judges. 10 minutes later OK, looks like our judges have made a decision... Damage: 8-7 Hati/Skoll Aggression: 8-7 Hati/Skoll Strategy: 9-6 TotFM And with a 23-22 split decision, the winner is....Tongue of the Fatman!!! Infrared vs Tria Prima [FF] Gabe calls BEES' wedge trash which makes the recipient of this insult run off crying. His angst later manifests itself in the form of an edgy livejournal post. Tria Prima wins by hurt feelings in who:cares. No Excuses Division Crosscut vs Highland Fling [V900] I'm not gonna sugarcoat it, this match has some... unique tactics on display here. Highland Fling zips out of it's starting square at 88 miles per hour while Crosscut just stands there (MENACINGLY) and takes it like a bitch. All CC would have to do is move out of the way a few inches to avoid HF's low-accuracy charges, but nope. He waits until a second too late to start actually driving toward the opponent, and gets chucked up into the air for it. A big slice of HF's chassis gets disintegrated, while the rest of the bot gets sent a very decent distance backward. Meanwhile, CC turns into a goddamn fidget spinner as it jumps- no, launches itself into the spike strip point-blank. Several of the thin spikes get severely bent in a myriad of directions upon impact, before CC finds itself swirling around the arena ramp. HF comes in for another LEEROY JEEEENKIIIIINS ram, and receives a hearty pimp-slap across the skirt. CC has more or less played directly into HF's hand, being able to get shunted around by a high-speed ram every dozen seconds. This would only be worse for CC if HF didn't take an eternity to aim itself, but CC certainly isn't winning any aggression points from the judges regardless. On the other hand, getting hacked and slashed indiscriminately by 16-power discs doesn't exactly do wonders for one's chassis. What, with HF looking more swiss cheese than robot. HF manages to get CC over to the pulverizer, just for the latter to pull a sick 480 off of the pulverizer handle and jamming a tooth right into the top of HF's chassis, more than enough to get HF to stop moving for the 10-count. Crosscut wins by KO in 1:06. Trial and Error vs Dock Leaf 2 [HFL] All right, Dock Leaf 2 immediately gets up to - no, wait, it's not spinning at all. Instead it zooms out of its starting square, going for the sides of Trial and Error. T&E's drivetrain is no slouch, though, and it aims its flipper at Dock Leaf 2, daring it to approach. Ah, I see what Dock Leaf are doing, they're trying to lure T&E into attacking with the flipper, then crank up the melty mode, which they can do extremely quickly, and tear the flipper off with the thwacking tail. Oh, no wait, they're actually going for its sides. After a couple tries where Dock Leaf ramp jumps off Trial and Error's flipper and spins itself around, it actually gets to its side. Ordinarily this wouldn't help much since you can sail a yacht under the ground clearance of Dock Leaf 2's wedge, but fortunately Trial and Error has those curved side panels, which let Dock Leaf get under it and start inching it towards the pulverizer. It may have enough torque to drive in normal mode, but it still doesn't have the greatest pushing power. Trial and Error finally manages to flail itself free with the flipper and retreats away. Dock Leaf 2 keeps going after it with the wedge, and gets away with it for a while, but eventually Trial and Error gets in a flip, sending Dock Leaf halfway to the arena ceiling. It crashes down hard enough that the top cover comes loose and it vomits up its batteries. However, the wiring seems to still be intact because Dock Leaf is still mobile, and it continues its suicidal attacks for a bit longer until Trial and Error flips it over again. This time it lands upside-down and gets high-centered on its own guts, which just goes to show that robot combat is the most metal sport in the world. Get it? Metal? Because robots are... no? Screw it, never mind. Your winner, by knockout in 1:56, is Trial and Error! America Offline vs Death Metal [V900] Alright it's 3 AM because I spent all night making robots instead of result-writing among other bad decisions, so let's get into the match. Both robots drive toward each other, with Death Metal blade making it's usual "vrrrrrrrr" noise soon enough. America Offline slams right into DM headon, popping it into the air about a foot. When it lands, Sylandro manages to land a couple of hammer hits into the top armor. DM's black support paneling buckles a little, and AO's own front armor wobbles when smacked with DM's big boy bar. DM starts spiralling around while AO shoves it into the wall, thwacking a wheel with it's hammer. Although, DM winds up grabbing a wedge seam about 15 seconds into this plowfest and rips open a big gap in AO's front-side. DM does a momentary handstand while AO gets flung away, before both robots go back to the neutral game. Rinse and repeat, after 3 or 4 big hits, the entire front armor panel gets chucked off and tossed away. AO tries to sneak back in but gets it's front completely mangled up attempting to do so. The hammer flops back down and doesn't come back up, there's probably a pill to fix that but drugs are generally a no-no in any sport. Some rattling can be heard from DM's spinner motor, but it manages to put AO down long enough for the match to end. Death Metal wins by KO in 2:10. ~~Deadline for W4 strats to be posted is February 3rd.~~ Edited by V900, Feb 10 2018, 11:44 PM.



V900	Feb 4 2018, 05:33 AM Post #7
Rubber Duck Enthusiast Posts: 536 Group: Members Member #86 Joined: September 16, 2011	Week 5 matches: Biological Warfare Division Nuclear Plague XL vs. Boring Brown Wedge [Shaba] Well, here we are in the final week before the preliminaries. Team Ignition's Nuclear Plague XL, is the front-runner for the Biological warfare division of the Middleweights. Meanwhile, we have Boring Brown Wedge, whos only victory was against Valravn. But, even though Trihunter is out of contention for the prelims, can he get one more win? Let's find out... The match starts and BB...ugh, gonna have to spell that one out, cuz reasons. OK, Boring Brown Wedge box rushes out of the gate, which is no huge surprise. And, here comes Nuclear Plague looking to meet him straight on, oh wait, he's trying to angle in with that powerful drum. However, the brown wedge has the speed and traction to prevent that from happening-well, easily happening. It's also armored like a tank, so, it has that going for it, as well. The brown doorstop is very nimble and NPXL ends up just riding up the wedge of the Boring Brown kind. The Team Ignition bot backs away and attempts to angle in again-and up the wedge he goes. TriHunter throttles the motors to shove NPXL over the nearby killsaws, but Badnik J-hooks off beforehand. He gyros to quickly get around the front of Boring Brown Wedge as it was manuevering to avoid driving over the killsaws, itself. And, the drum makes contact with the left side. NPXL is knocked back some, while Boring Brown Wedge is tossed upward and flipped. No bid deal there, and TriHunter rushes in on Nuclear Plague. It wedges under before Badnik can react and begins to shove it towards the wall drum, however, NPXL simply monstertrucks over that shallow wedge and gyros around for another solid pop that sends the brown doorstop upwards. The final minute of the match ends up being a repeat of the above tactics. A few more pops from NPXL's drum and some nice sparks, but even with that, only a few dings and scuffs are visible on Boring Brown Wedge. There's the buzzer and this one is going to the judges. Damage: 9-6 NPXL Aggression: 8-7 NPXL Strategy: 8-7 NPXL Your winner and advancing comfortably into the Middleweight Finals, is Nuclear Plague XL! Neophyte Redglare vs. Ikea's Guard Dog [Shaba] And the match begins with IGD employing the simple strategy of rushing the opponent, knowing it has the speed and control advantage. NR comes out and immediately tries to outmanuever IGD's charge and just barely does so. IGD quickly turs and scoops up Neophyte Redglare and slams it hard into the wall spikes. NR got turned around some as it was pushed and the front is wedged pretty good under those spikes, but, Syl is able to fire the front flipper to release their bot from the wall. IGD is waiting, though, and it pounces on NR just as its freeing itself from the wall. Not giving Syl any chance to react, Mole shoves NP into the wall again and pins for the duration of the alloted pin time. It finally backs off and allows NP to move away from the wall. Syl attemps to angle NP in on IGD again, but is swiftly met by that large, white scoop. And the Homestuck waifu bot gets slammed into the corner under the pulverizer, which comes down BAM and dents NR's top armor some. The duration of this match is rinse-wash-repeat of the above. Neither competitor giving an inch, but IGD looks to have had the upper hand for the duration of the match. Let's see if the judges saw otherwise. Damage: 8-7 IGD Aggression: 8-7 IGD Strategy: 8-7 NR Your winner by a 23-22 split decision, and retaining 2nd place, is Ikea's Guard Dog! Incredible Dawg Adventure vs. Valravn [W0lf] (result) The Deliverer Division Precise Saunter Mk.3 vs. Sekhmet [V900] (result) Glitch vs. Magica [V900]* Alllllright, so a classic lifter versus vertical spinner matchu- huh. Looks like Gabe is going with the crusher instead. It's an odd choice, but sure let's go with it. Looks like Pyro wasn't expecting Gabe to go with the crusher, because his hammer/crusher protection is off. All it takes is one handhold and BOOM, pregnant. Always wear protection, kids. That aside, Glitch rolls out only for Magica to zip around looking all cool with it's sidewinding and stuff. In addition to it's strafing ability, the massive speed gap between the two botsmakes it easy for Magica to zip around Glitch's menacing crusher and just swoop under the wedges. Up and over Glitch goes with a flip; and Gabe's mashing buttons to selfright, barely doing so in time to only take a single hit from the pulverizer. A hammer blow to 5 armor has to hurt, and it does, as evidenced by the big ol dent in Glitch's top. It drives away to escape, but Magica follows and gives Glitch a fondle from behind, tickling the undersides with it's wedgelet-ridden flipper. This continues for another minute, all the while Glitch manages to grab Magica once. Unfortunately for him, this isn't actually R4 and crushers still suck in the default ARC rules. You have no power here! The holes it pokes into Magica's front plow are impressive, but ultimately not compromising. The rest of the match sees Glitch get tossed by the wall drum and shunted around several more times. Buzzer goes "buzz" and JD time: Damage: 9-6 Magica Aggression: 10-5 Magica Strategy: 10-5 Magica Magica wins by judge's decision 29-16. Stingray vs. Chaotic Insurgency [FF]* Instead of transforming into a literal stingray, the namesake bot decides to turn into a swam of bees and attacks the audience! This continues for the whole 3 minutes of the match, and several people are hospitalized from excess bee venom or something. Let's go to a judge's decision, I guess...? Damage: 15-0 Stingray (while bees!Stingray didn't do any damage to it's opponent, it sure did some damage to the people watching this "fight". Chaotic Insurgency also didn't do any damage to the bees.) Aggression: 15-0 Stingray (Angry bees tend to be pretty aggressive!) Strategy: 14-1 (CI drove around the arena. That's gotta count for something.) Stingray wins by judge's decision 44-1. ---- Vomit Comet Division Hati and Skoll vs. Dysprosinator [W0lf]* Dysprosinator puts on the jets and tries to single out Skoll. However, before he can fully reach the disc spinner, Hati blindsides him and attacks at the front. Hati is able to push him for a bit until he slides a bit off the wedge, allowing his treads to touch the ground. TBR raises the rear actuator a bit and attempts to reverse off of Hati's wedge, which Dys eventually does so. Hati goes for another quick slide underneath, but this time Dysprosinator gets a running start. Welp, Dysprosinator manages to monstertruck Hati. And with Skoll not too far behind, it manages to tank Skoll before it gets up to full speed. It's now under Skoll, lifter raised, and... clamped. Now it's hoping to deliver some hazard damage. HFL looks like somebody touched his spaghet and aggressively throws Hati back into the mix. It's managed to get underneath Dysprosinator, and is pushing it around a bit, but Dys still has the other half of the cluster in it's jaw. Hati seems to be pushing at a slower rate with all that weight on the front, but it's slowly carrying the opponent around. Dys soon releases Skoll shortly before it slides off of the wedge of Hati. The fight continues and Hati gets underneath again, but with the treads of Dysprosinator pushing back, it's not quite able to get as much push as it wants. But it eventually delivers it to Skoll, who has spun up fully. It makes a small dent in the side panel, but that's about it. Hati seems to be getting under every time, but there are at least two or three occasions where Dys is able to ride up the wedge and smack into Skoll. The buzzer signals the end of this back and forth match. Aggression: 8-7 Hati and Skoll Damage: 9-6 Hati and Skoll Strategy: 8-7 Dysprosinator Hati and Skoll wins 24-21 Tria Prima vs. Doomerang 3 [V900]* Alright, 5-armored (technically 4-6) armored drum vs 13 weapon thwack. I have a feeling this won't end well. Tria Prima sends out it's slowass minibots and spoiler alert: it doesn't end well. Salt and Suplhur just get slapped against the wall and more-or-less disintegrate into confetti on impact. To TP's benefit, Doomerang hops up a little bit upon murder-izing the second minibot, but it's hardly the disastrous, uncontrollable flopping Gabe was hoping for. Mercury tries it and immediately has the ridges on it's front wedge caught on, sending the bot spiralling in the opposite direction that Doomerang is spinning. Doomerang also gets sent some distance, but without a fuckhuge gash across it's front like Mercury currently has. Doomerang drives over to center stage while Mercury... tries. It takes half a minute before the two make contact again, but Mercury gets the bit of wedge below it's drum smacked by Doomerang again and craps it's pants for real this time. Doomerang wins in 1:03. Infrared vs. Tongue of the Fatman [HFL]* Infrared gets its drum up to speed and comes out of its square, while Tongue of the Fatman makes a beeline for the middle of the arena. Infrared, interestingly, turns around and goes backwards, trying to get its rear wedge under its opponent. TotF seems to be lower to the ground, though, despite having removed its front skids from the flipper. Infrared rides up the wedge, but off-center, and it gets away without being flipped. Another attempt, and again Infrared can't get under TotF's wedge, but again TotF doesn't fire the flipper. Is there a gentlemen's agreement to not use their weapons that I'm not aware of? Well, if there was, it just got violated! Infrared tries to get to the side of TotF, but that ends up letting TotF get under the corner of its chassis. It gives a quick shove forward to get Infrared all the way up on its wedge, and flips! Infrared gets sent flying - that must be a good six or seven feet in the air! It comes down hard, but it's invertible, and goes back on the attack. Infrared finally manages to get past TotF's wedge, and shoves it over the killsaws. I doubt that did much to TotF's thick armor, but it did pop it into the air, which gives Infrared the chance to turn around and attack with its drum. TotF just manages to turn in time to avoid getting its wheel torn off, but the drum strikes its front corner and spins it away. However, the advantage doesn't last. Once Tongue of the Fatman is back on its feet, as it were, it again makes it extremely hard for Infrared to get past its wedge. Its driver is being conservative with the flipper, but every time it does get a flip in it tosses its opponent like a ragdoll. At one point Infrared is slammed into the Lexan above the spike strip, and it's lucky this arena doesn't have any OOTA areas. Infrared also gets a couple of shots in with its drum by pushing TotF against the wall and then turning around, but it's not able to get to its wheels. The thing is though, TotF is fighting very passively, just waiting for Infrared to come to it. Neither bot has caused any real damage, but Infrared's at least caused scratches, so this could be a tricky judges' decision for the flipper... or could it? Another flip catapults Infrared high into the air, and it comes down directly on its drum! Sparks fly, and the floor panel visibly ripples. Infrared bounces away, and lands on its wheels as usual, but it seems to be limping now. Its front wheels don't look like they're touching the floor! That hinged weapon pod normally transfers the force of an impact to the floor via the supports built into the pod, but at the angle of that hit on the floor that didn't really work, and I think something may have been bent and jammed the mechanism up. Infrared is having real trouble driving now, with only two wheels on the floor, and TotF takes advantage, getting to its side and flipping it again. Luckily this impact seems to knock the weapon pod's hinge free again, but now one of the drumbots wheels is visibly bent and is dragging along the floor. There are a couple more exchanges of hits from Infrared's drum and TotF's flipper, but at this point neither robot is at its best. Infrared lets out a bit of smoke late in the fight, and the damaged side of its drivetrain stops entirely. The drum is spinning up a lot more slowly, and judging by the lack of a death hum it isn't reaching its full speed. TotF's flipper is also much less powerful now, probably thanks to its gas supply running low. The fight ends with both robots still working, so this will go to the judges. Judges' Decision: Damage: Infrared 4, Tongue of the Fatman 11 Aggression: Infrared 10, Tongue of the Fatman 5 Strategy: Infrared 5, Tongue of the Fatman 10 Your winner, by a 26-19 Judges' Decision, is Tongue of the Fatman! (edit: HFL is bad at addition ) No Excuses Division Dock Leaf 2 vs. Crosscut [W0lf] (result) Death Metal vs. Highland Fling [HFL] Well, Highland Fling tries to box rush, with the operative word being "tries." It spins out of control halfway across the arena and ends up veering into the spike strip at ludicrous speed. A second charge also misses completely, unless Highland Fling was aiming for the killsaws. HF's strategy of stopping Death Metal from spinning up is a complete failure at this point; the bar spinner is just sitting in the middle of the arena going at full speed. Highland Fling finally manages to get control back, and tries to drive around the side of Death Metal, still not spinning up, but it still ends up drifting sideways, and Death Metal takes the opportunity to smack it when it isn't spinning. Death Metal sends itself spinning away thanks to HF's skirts actually functioning as skirts for once, but the hit isn't enough to slow down the blade much. Death Metal keeps getting in hit after hit, but despite Highland Fling's lack of control, it's an effective speed bump. The skirts keep deflecting DM's bar, albeit getting beat up in the process, and one hit actually knocks Death Metal into the wedge wall and makes it flip itself. The bar has stopped! Highland fling approaches, and suddenly it's spinning in a blue and white blur, but it can't drift in fast enough, and Death Metal gets away from the wall and spins up! Highland Fling spins down again, tires squealing, but it's not quick enough! Death Metal comes in again, but this time the blade is high enough off the ground to avoid the skirts and hit the less-armored main body panels. And it's a huge hit! Highland Fling gets a massive gash torn in its armor, and subsequent hits put similar holes in two more panels and start to peel the top cover up. Highland Fling is desperately trying to avoid that bar, but it's not working out. It gets to DM's side once, but Death Metal just pivots the bar in again, and this time it rides up on top of Highland Fling, lacerating the top panel and de-treading a wheel. With its drivetrain damaged HF has no choice to spin up, but now its teeth can't even make contact with Death Metal's bar. The bots meet again, and huge chunks of metal go flying! Death Metal pirouettes away, gyrodancing on its rear end. Highland Fling skids off and comes to a stop near its starting square, with its top section just cleaved open. One armor panel has been caved in, two more are missing entirely, and half the top panel has been torn off. Highland Fling is dead in the water, and Death Metal takes its victory spin to complete an undefeated group stage run! Your winner, by knockout in 2:14, is Death Metal! America Offline vs. Trial and Error [HFL] Two similar designs face off for second and third place in their division, the combined flipper and hammer of Trial and Error, and the, umm, regular hammer of America Offline. Trial and Error comes out with its flipper leading, which makes sense since it's lower than the bot's plow, but the flipper wedge is also longer, and initially America Offline manages to sneak its own plow under the side of it. AO's hammer comes down once, twice, three times. This doesn't seem to be causing any damage, but it's also pushing T&E towards the pulverizer - I guess if your own hammer won't cut it, use the arena's. T&E finally fires its own weapon, and its axe actually hooks onto the u-shaped weapon arm of America Offline. AO is yanked into the air, and T&E is tipped sideways. America Offline still has one wheel on the ground, and the bots try to drag each other around, but the weapons appear to be stuck together. The match may need to be stopped - no, never mind, they're free again. After a bit of jockeying for position, Trial and Error gets its flipper into play, tossing America Offline high into the air. AO quickly self-rights though, and is away again before Trial and Error can get its flipper retracted. It tries to get around T&E's side, but just gets flipped again. There's not really a whole lot actually happening this match damage-wise, but it certainly looks cool. America Offline is getting in more hammer blows, but it's not really doing anything, and often even when it gets to T&E's side, T&E just fires its own hammer and knocks America Offline aside. Trial and Error is able to keep America Offline at bay most of the time though, and while those massive flips don't seem to be causing any internal damage to AO either, they are winning it points with the judges. The match ends with Trial and Error low on gas and really only overturning America Offline with the flips, while America Offline's hammer is still going strong. But America Offline has spent a lot of time upside-down, and the couple of hammer blow Trial and Error did get have put holes in its top armor, while AO has only inflicted scratches. This could be a close decision. Judges' Decision: Damage: Trial and Error 9, America Offline 6 Aggression: Trial and Error 6, America Offline 9 Strategy: Trial and Error 9, America Offline 6 Your winner, by a 24-21 Judges' Decision, is Trial and Error! But in the end, it doesn't even matter, because both bots advance to the playoffs, and neither of them gets a bye. ~~Deadline for W5 strats to be posted is February 10th.~~ These matches include one or more bots that currently have 2 wins, where the threshold to advance is 3 wins. As such, they will be written first. Edited by V900*, Feb 14 2018, 03:25 AM.



V900	Feb 14 2018, 07:26 PM Post #8
Rubber Duck Enthusiast Posts: 536 Group: Members Member #86 Joined: September 16, 2011	Well done everyone, well done! HOWEVER. Week 5 is over, so here are the current group standings: lets be honest noone cares mate MIDDLEWEIGHT BRACKET Biological Warfare Division Valravn: 0-4 Boring Brown Wedge: 1-4 Ikea's Guard Dog: 4-1 Nuclear Plague XL: 5-0 Incredible Dawg Adventure: 1-3 Neophyte Redglare: 3-2 The Deliverer Division Chaotic Insurgency: 1-4 Sekhmet: 4-0 Magica: 3-2 Precise Saunter Mk.3: 0-4 Stingray: 3-2 Glitch: 2-3 -- HEAVYWEIGHT BRACKET Vomit Comet Division Tongue Of The Fatman: 4-1 Dysprosinator: 2-3 Doomerang 3: 3-2 Hati And Skoll: 3-2 Infrared: 2-3 Tria Prima: 1-4 No Excuses Division Trial And Error: 4-1 Crosscut: 1-3 Highland Fling: 0-5 Dock Leaf 2: 1-3 America Offline: 3-2 Death Metal: 5-0 -- That being said, here are the robots advancing to the playoffs: Middleweights: Ikea's Guard Dog Nuclear Plague XL Neophyte Redglare Sekhmet Magica Precise Saunter Mk.3 Stingray Heavyweights: Tongue Of The Fatman Doomerang 3 Hati And Skoll Trial And Error America Offline Death Metal Now we move onto the playoff/final rounds. MW playoff brackets HW playoff brackets And the matches: Ikea's Guard Dog vs Stingray [V900] BEES edited his RP post after submitting it so he's DQed lol. What do you mean, "Don't be a total shitheel"? It's almost 4 AM and I don't want to write a result. Therefore, BEES is DQ'd. GG no re. ... ... ... Fine. Whatever. Alright so both bots approach each other. It's made pretty clear that despite being faster than his opponent in all regards, Stingray's control is about on the same level as a greased up hog sliding down a slip-n-slide coated in a teflon and soap cocktail relative to Ikea's Guard Dog. Stringray can keep the front toward IGD well enough given his situation, but getting under initially is another matter. The puncher pops out and slides up the white wedge. BEES tries it again, and pushing the wedge out before trying to get under IGD seems to do the trick. Mole doesn't bother trying to angle or anything, and keeps going on his usual "Press down, wedge, lift, and ram" schtick. Yes, that is the ENTIRE strategy he posted. Again. IGD is able to shove Stingray with it's raw power whenever it has an even set of wheels on the ground, but that doesn't really happen too often. They're both sweatin'. Knees weak, arms are sweaty. Mom's spa- wait, did BEES just start spinning in place? That it did. Does it work? Not really! IGD just shoves it aside for a few seconds before Stingray gives up and goes back to acting as a dumb wedge itself. IGD gets brushed by the hazards something like once or twice. Not a whole ton of damage done, but at least it's something. The two continue hugging it out for the last 15 seconds of the match before it's over. Damage: 9-6 Stingray Aggression: 8-7 Stingray Strategy: 8-7 Stingray Stingray wins by judge's decision, 25-20. Magica vs Neophyte Redglare [HFL] All right, it's the battle of rear-hinged flipper vs. front-hinged flipper, also known as "Mecanum Tracks: How Good Are They Really?" Both robots are very quick getting out of their squares, but a little cautious in actually getting to grips with each other. They circle around each other, feeling each other out, which is aided by Magica's design. But finally, Magica edges its scoop under Neophyte Redglare's wedge and flips! Redglare goes over onto its back! It fires the flipper to self-right, but Magica is in position to get under its side and roll it over 540 degrees again. Redglare gets pushed into the spike strip, but self-rights again and gets away. At first the fight is going strongly in Magica's favor. Neophyte Redglare just can't seem to get to its opponent's side due to Magica strafing all over the place, and the sharpened teeth on the scoop are getting right under Redglare's wedge. But those sharpened teeth eventually meet one of the many gashes that robots, and I'm not naming names but the main offenders rhyme with "Breath Nettle" and "Flossputt", have put in the arena floor. Magica is stuck! It fires the flipper to get free, but just tips its own chassis forward. Redglare gets underneath its side, pushes, and flips! It's not a particularly efficient flip due to not having much bite, but Magica is overturned all the same. Magica fires its flipper, but the weapon's shape doesn't give it enough of a kick to self-right. And while it's invertible, the wedge is completely ineffective. It decides to ram into Redglare's wedge, hoping to get flipped back over, but Redglare knows it has the advantage, and decides to keep Magica upside-down and just push it around the arena. Magica gets a trip over the killsaws and a couple pulverizer blows before it finally rams Redglare fast enough to sort of ramp-jump back onto its tracks. But in the meantime there are little mecanum rollers rolling around the arena floor. In fact, Neophyte Redglare gets temporarily high-centered on one. But once it's righted, Magica goes right back to dominating the fight, repeatedly flipping Redglare and making the onboard compressor really work hard with repeated self-righting. It loses one of its scoop teeth to the killsaws, but gets some pulverizer blows in on the top of Redglare as well. The fight runs out of time, and this could be interesting. Will the time Magica spent inverted, and the damage it's sustained, be enough to compensate for its greatly superior control? Judges' Decision: Damage: Magica 6, Neophyte Redglare 9 Aggression: Magica 9, Neophyte Redglare 6 Strategy: Magica 10, Neophyte Redglare 5 Your winner by a 25-20 Judges' Decision, and moving on to the semifinals, is Magica! Hati and Skoll vs America Offline [W0lf] Fire in the hole. America Offline aims to go for Skoll, but in comes Hati, getting underneath the plow and sending it backward from it's target. AOL goes batshit crazy with the hammer, firing as many shots as it can before driving off. Not much damage dealt. America Offline goes for Skoll once more, but is unable to with Hati guarding it. However, AOL does manage to angle in and get underneath Hati, sending a hell barrage of hammer blows. Ineffective hammer blows, but hammer blows. Hati is able to get out of the way before more punishment is sustained. Hati now gets underneath again and pins it to the wall. Skoll inches a bit closer during the fight, but is still at a distance. Pin is released and AOL goes in for more hammer blows on Hati. It gets another one in before it gets picked up again. It manages to escape luckily. This goes on for a bit with AOL not having much luck getting underneath Hati, or touching Skoll. However, in the final minute of the match, Skoll has been inching closer and closer. Hati is hit by the hammer, but sends America Offline into the wall drum, flipping it over. America Offline is halfway done self right if when it gets stuck under Hati again and pinned. Welp, here comes Skoll. America Offline's rear wheels are stuck up against the wall. The side panel now has a large gap and one of the front wheels is missing. This hit also frees America Offline. It hopes to get a hammer blow in, but just misses the mark. Aggression: 9-6 America Offline Damage: 12-3 Hati and Skoll Strategy: 10-5 Hati and Skoll Hati and Skoll wins 28-17 Trial and Error vs Doomerang 3 [Various] This one's a best 2 out of 3 match, folks! MATCH 1 [HFL]: Doomerang 3 spins up very quickly and heads out sideways from its starting square. Trial and Error, uhh, backs into the wall. It finally lurches forward, trying to aim its plow approximately at Doomerang, but its steering is all over the place, and as it finally approaches, Doomerang jukes sideways, and Trial and Error steers in completely the wrong direction, giving its opponent a perfect shot at its side! That hit tears a huge gash in the side panel of Trial and Error and sends it spinning away. It tries to point itself at Doomerang 3 again, and I'm hearing something from the driving booth about reversed wiring. You'd think that wouldn't be a problem with a robot that drives both ways, but maybe there's a switch or something. Doomerang bounces off T&E's wedge a couple times, but another hit smacks the corner of the wedge and already it looks kind of loose on the robot's body. T&E fires its hammer out of desperation, but just gets it bent and jammed in the down position... which also gets the flipper stuck raised. At this point, T&E is starting to drive a little bit better, but it's still clumsy, and after a while Doomerang 3 gets to its side again and rips that side panel away completely, which causes Trial and Error to stop working. Your winner, by knockout in 2:14, is Doomerang 3! (Doomerang 3 wins by Forfeit) MATCH 2 [PLAYZOOKI?!]: Trial and Error vs Doomerang 3 So Doomerang 3 starts the fight by spinning out and moving out to the side. Badnik tries not to attack Trial and Error head on, but this doesn't work as Trial and Error uses it's extra speed to drive up to Doomerang and twat him with the hammer. This causes massive damage to Doomerang and by the end of the 3 minutes, there's nothing left of it. Fortunately, the judges were busy having a piss for most of the fight and only got back in time to make the decision, so they didn't count Doomerang out. Damage: 15-0 Trial and Error Aggression: 12-3 Trial and Error Strategy: 14-1 Trial and Error Length of RP: 155-0 Doomerang 3 Doomerang 3 wins by a 159-41 Judges Decision. MATCH 3 [V900]: trial and error drops a steamroller on doomerang and wins by ko or something idk Doomerang wins 2-1, good job. The deadline for this round is Febuary 17th. Take note of that. That's THIS Saturday, not NEXT Saturday. We're doing short weeks from here on out. (Not all the matches for W5 are posted, but none of the unposted matches will affect the playoffs in any way.) Edited by V900, Feb 22 2018, 04:43 AM.



V900	Feb 22 2018, 04:46 AM Post #9
Rubber Duck Enthusiast Posts: 536 Group: Members Member #86 Joined: September 16, 2011	next round baybee Sekhmet vs. Stingray [V900] Okay. Correct me if I'm wrong here and I'll edit the match accordingly, but I'm not seeing BEES' weapon config declared anywhere in his strategy post. You would really think that'd be important for a bot with such different strategies for each weapon choice, but eh. I guess he wasn't feeling it. Let's spin the wheel instead! Alright, so I'm going with this one then. And we're off! It's a slow start as Stingray is busy doing some fancy... maneuvers? If you can call them that... it's looking like the bot is having some trouble doing all the flanking tricks that it's driver was intent on pulling off. Sekhmethmet, on the other hand, has the opposite problem. Stingray's mildly errative driving is forcing HFL to play the defensive. Thankfully for him, the killsaws are there to serve as border patrol between Stingray and Sekhmet. The two bots play ring-around-the-rosie for a little bit, with Sekhmet running away like a wimp-ass while Stingray sloppily skids around some radius of the killsaw. Then Sekhmet turns around. Stingray manages to get under for a split second and push it away, but Sekhmet seems unphased. Trying to get under again, Stingray's hinged wedges have no dice against Sekhmet's big statically-mounted plow. BEES attempts to mash backwards on the analog at the last moment, but it's too late. Stingray slides up the wedge and BOOM, there's the money shot. 6 corner damage typically doesn't end well for the guy on the receiving end, and this is hardly any exception. One of the wedges just straight flies off and lands, uh, somewhere? Maybe? I think it might have got caught on the lighting. The flipper and other hinged wedge aren't looking too good either, but they're still (mostly) attached. Of course, none of that even matters since Stingray's locomotion is SNAFU. There isn't even any one-wheeled limping around, it's just dead in the water. BEES is wondering why a hit to the front wedges caused his drive to shit the bed, until the realization hits him that his motors seem suspiciously loose inside his chassis, almost as if they had been knocked out of place. Likewise, the entire robot is determined to be knocked out. Sekhmet wins by KO in 0:57. Nuclear Plague XL vs Magica [Shaba] Here we go with the RFN Lightweight Semifinals. Who will go on to the Final? The match begins and both robots head towards each other, although NP a bit slower. Magica box rushes Nuclear Plague and while NP attempts to angle in on the mecanum-tracked bot, Magica is just too quick. A strafe to the right, a strafe to the left-and Magica gets that plow under Nuclear Plague's drum. He then lifts and rams NP into the wall drum. Np gets tossed a bit, but lands upright and goes after Magica, this time throttling down his powerful drum to limit the gyro to try to outmaneuver Magica this time. Magica continues to strafe and counter. NP finds an opening while Magica strafes out of the way of the killsaw slots, and revs up that drum. Jake saw that coming, just in time, and brings Magica around so that drum eats plow. Magica begins to ram NP into the wall hazards again, but Badnik is able to back off and get free. He gyro-turns quickly and catches a corner of Magica. The mecanum-tracked bot backs away quickly before significant damage can be done and starts to strafe around NP, looking for another opening. The Team Ignition bot angles like mad, that drum audibly rising and falling in pitch. One more minute left, and it's still a close match. Magica just seems to run circles around Nuclear Plague, but Badnik isn't having any of it. He knows Magica can't cause any major damage to NP, he gyro-turns like mad now, trying to catch a part of Magica that isn't plow. However, it seems like at every turn, NP just ends up riding up that plow-though, he does a fine job of preventing Jake from ramming him straight into the wall hazards, at least. A break does come where Magica accidently gets hit by the killsaws and somewhat tears up the right-side treads and loses some of the mecanum rollers, but it still manages to drive well enough to prevent Nuclear Plague from capitalizing. And there's the buzzer! This will go to the judges. After a bit of deliberation, a decision has been made. The winner, with a 23-22 judges' decision and advancing to the Robot Fight Night Middleweight Finals......is Magica! Here's the numbers- Damage: 9-6 Nuclear Plague Aggression: 8-7 Magica Strategy: 9-6 Magica ---- Death Metal vs Hati and Skoll [V900] I don't have anything horribly unfunny to say here, so let's get into the match sooner rather than later. So, Shaba starts the match off expecting Hati to roll out and do it's typical brick schtick. Surprise surprise, Hati rolls out to do it's typical brick schtick. "Next you'll say, 'How did she know what I was going to do?'" Shaba replies, pointing at her opponent. HFL replies. "How did she know what I was going to to? N-NANI?!" Okay, maybe I DID have something horribly unfunny to say after all. This is all just me coming up with random shit to put in place of "Hati basically rams directly into the Deadly Spinner(tm) like every other doorstop wedge in the history of ever does" anyway. Because that's what it does. Death Metal's front pops up into the air a little as the blade bounces off of Hati's front panelling, the wheels lifting ever-so-slightly off the ground as it does so. After a few crashes, Hati somehow winds up having DM land directly onto it. Sitting underneath DM's blade is a precarious position to be in, but that's no issue for Hati, it looks like. Hati pushes DM to the wall and... that's about it. You can only get so much pushing power out of a robot so small. It's worth noting that this pushing does last for the full 30 seconds, however. Hati is obligated to let go, Skoll still waiting nearby for it's chance to strike. Tombclone-to-hazard mishaps aren't panning out too well. Of course, neither is DM's plan of shoving Hati off to the side. Death Metal gets a single inch on Hati's front-side, giving it a nasty gash as it's sent a very respectable distance. With Hati out of the way, Skoll is next- that is, until Hati chases after and catches up with DM. Taking it from behind, Hati shoves Death Metal into a wall, blade-first this time! This proves to be much more effective than whatever accident happened earlier, sending Death Metal flying off with some scratches. DM eventually restabilizes in the center of the arena, only to get rear-ended by Hati again. This time, into the arena drum. DM flops backward into the air, bashing itself on the ground like a snake hopped up on LSD. Sensing the time is right, Skoll comes out to play! That is, if you call plucking a wheel off of DM playing. Hati and Skoll try to finagle Death Metal into getting it's other wheel torn off by Skoll or some arena hazard, but the remaining ~40 seconds isn't enough to make that happen. Let's go to the judges: Aggression: 8-7 Hati and Skoll Damage: 10-5 Hati and Skoll Strategy: 9-6 Hati and Skoll Hati and Skoll win by judge's decision, 27-18. Tongue of the Fatman vs Doomerang 3 [Goat] A matchup in which the flipper is as fast as the melty spinner. Now I�ve seen everything. The flipper is also trying to rush the spinner. Now I�ve seen everything +1! No but yeah ToF goes ahead and rams itself into Doomerang, whose driver is able to strafe a bit and catch a corner. This happens for a while, until it doesn�t because ToF angled in properly this time. Doomerang rides up the flipper a bit and Noah tries to get a flip in, but the spinner is most of the way off of ToF, so all that does is shove Doomerang completely behind the flipperbot, which I guess protected its wheels. Anywho, they meet again � eventually � and ToF�s driver is a bit too hasty on the trigger this time, getting smacked away for its troubles. Perhaps third time�s the charm? Actually, third time�s the time where Doomerand hits ToF on the side again and knocks them away. Still next to no damage on the flipperbot outside of paint scratches, amazingly. That�s a lotta full speed hits. Time�s running out (these two are VERY slow, so there�s been a lot of downtime between hits :V ), and they meet again. This time Noah oversteers when trying to angle in � his fancy wheel setup betraying him � and exposes his left side wheel to Doomerang. Dylan�s not one to pass up a chance to win when he sees it, and smacks that wheel good. And then time runs out as the wheel rolls forlornly across the arena. Aggression: 8-7 Doomerang Damage: 10-5 Doomerang Control: 8-7 Doomerang Your winner, and moving onto the finals in a 26-19 decision, is Doomerang! As a reminder, here are the brackets: MW playoff brackets HW playoff brackets Your strategies are to be posted by February 24TH. That's this Saturday, as per usual. Edited by V900, Mar 4 2018, 03:56 PM.



V900	Mar 4 2018, 04:00 PM Post #10
Rubber Duck Enthusiast Posts: 536 Group: Members Member #86 Joined: September 16, 2011	final roundo da Sekhmet vs Magica [V900] HOLY FRICK IT'S DA FINALZ!!!11!!1 I'd put The Final Countdown by Europe here, but our team of highly experienced chimpanz- I mean Lawyers[tm] couldn't secure the rights, so here's a MIDI version of it instead. I bet noones ever used THAT song for the finals of a tournament before, surely not. Completely unoriginal and unfunny jokes aside, though, it's finally time to wrap up what I guess technically counts as my first tourney. I never asked for this. IIIIIiiin the red square, we've got ~~minion~~ Sekhmet! (cheap party horn sounds) And in the blue square, Magica! (slightly-cheaper-than-average party horn sounds) I've pussyfooted around the actual result long enough. Let's get right in. First off, HFL decides not to use the skids. Why? Lol don't look at me like I know. I guess he just hates getting under things, because Magica's zipping around looking like goddamn Sonic the Hedgehog hopped up on some kinda narcotics, single and ready to mingle with Sekmet's baby-bearing plow flanks. Just look at that gap. Wow. Magica's able to swooce right in pretty easily the first time around due to the aforementioned drug-induced hedgehog speeds it possesses. Despite lifting up one end of HFL's robot, however, the other end (and it's respective wheel) is still sitting on the ground, causing Sekhment to just drive forward and accept the massive amount of gyro forces it's gonna end up eating. And mind you, it does end up eating them. Thing wobbles a bit side to side before Magica taps it exactly once. Sekhmet then outs herself as the crazy yandere GF because hoo boy she's flipping and flopping and generally being a spastic. It eventually gets itself back upright, because that weapon is scary and Pyro knows better than to try and attack it with his 9 armor. For now, at least. Eventually, the match resets to neutral. About a minute or so has passed and the only thing that's been accomplished is giving Sekhmet some various scratching from chucking itself over the killsaws for something like a second at the most. C'mon lads, don't let the final be one of those "literally nothing happens for 3 minutes so it goes to JD, strategy: no" matches. But wait, there's a glimmer of hope yet! Magica comes in for another dangerously cheesy side-flank, only for Sekhmet to TURN NINETY DEGREES!!! THE HYPE IS REAL!!!!!!!!! But really, the turn sends Sekhmet up onto it's side a lil' yet again, until the blade makes contact with the plow all like "WAPOW". Now, I don't know what this: "If he attacks me directly, I should be able to control where matchups happen in my favour (sic), giving me a path to flip him into a hazard when I get under him and flip him, and keeping myself out of the hazards if the reverse happens. How can mirrors be real if our eyes aren't real?" - tupac ...is supposed to mean, but what I do know is that Sekhment just ripped Magica a new one. The flipper wearily flops forward, CO2 puffing out the newly created face-hole on Magica's front. We get it, you vape. The rest of the match kind of goes down the crapper for Magica, who is now unable to press it's flipper into the ground. Sekhmet gets under the functionally hinged wedge and tosses it across the arena. Twice. Three times! Four! MONSTER COMBO! To say Magica is a little bit battered is an understatement. You know those fancy headlights that I'm pretty sure exactly none of the writers (myself included) implemented into any of it's matches? Well, I'm finally implementing them! They're shattered to bits and scattered across the arena. So is the rest of the bot. Your winner by KO in 1:56 (and also MW RFN champion) is Sekhmet. ---- Hati and Skoll vs Doomerang 3 [V900] HOLY FRICK IT'S THE OTHER FINALZ!!!!2!!!!22 Something something here's a shitty version of a song usually used for final matches pls clap In the red square, Hati & Skoll! (audience starts booing) In the blue square, Doomerang! (audience goes silent, one guy can be heard audibly coughing, another guy tries to start a crowd wave but fails miserably) Right off the bat, both spinners start spinning. OBVIOUSLY EXCITING MATCH INBOUND. Doomerang is rotating in a mystery direction and continuing to do that for the entire match, because Badnik never actually stated it in his strategy post. So... let's just go with, uh, let's see, heads for clockwisde, tails for... counterclockwise! Yep, that one. Anyway Doomerang spins counterclockwise and Skoll accordingly goes on the prowl. Both of these guys talk a big game about hitting super specific points on the opponent, but they also shit-for-speed. Powerful and precise hits are basically a "choose one" situation for anything that isn't a vertical, and even those are in a jack-of-all-trades-master-of-none sort of deal, but I digress. Long story short neither of these guys are getting the slip on the other by any sort of slow "maneuvers" they may pull, lol. The spinners rattle toward one another and send their respective opponents flying. Doomerang skitters a quarter's distance across the arena while Skoll slams against the wall. That's the magic of putting one THOUSAND wheels on your double-weight robot. Both these guys also have 3 corner damage over the other guy's armor, meaning we'll see some robot gore soon. And that we do! After a minute-and-so along with few failed interventions from Hati to try and stop Doomerang from spinning back up (wherein some of Doomerang's wheels come off the ground but never really all of them like HFL was gunning for, along with Badnik grabbing Hati's wedge corners and だが断る'ing it a fair distance away with each hit), Doomerang and Skoll collide for the umpteenth time. It doesn't end well! Skoll receiving high-speed impacts against the arena's walls and floors has proven to do some additional, substantial damage to it's internals. Of course, this isn't helped by the repeated weapon-to-weapon hits it's been receiving for the entire match. But yeah, both robots have bits come flying off. For Doomerang, it's an entire one of it's three teeth! That's gonna hurt in the morning. Not as much as Skoll's entire top panel snapping off of it's bolts, of course. Aaand there's a battery (complete with it's wiring) on the ground! Hmm, I wonder which dead-in-the-water horizontal that could belong to. Skoll is promptly counted out, although Doomerang needs to kill Hati in order to clinch the match with a KO. With 11 armor, the crippled 13-speed melty obviously isn't going to do that. The last 45 seconds of the match are just Badnik trying to melty, failing, and then resorting to runaway tactics once Hati approaches. Hati does manage to wedge Doomerang, only for it to run off. The buzzer sounds, and this match is done! Let's get the low-down from our judges, fellas. Damage: 9-6, Doomerang 3 (While Skoll did some considerable damage to Doomerang by ripping off one of it's teeth and effectively disabling it's weapon for the last few moments of the match, Doomerang knocking Skoll out of the match entirely tipped this one in it's favor.) Aggression: 10-5 Hati and Skoll (Doomerang had to run away for the last ~25% of the match, although it did show good initiative to go for Skoll. Hati at least tried to go after Doomerang every so often, even if it didn't always work.) Strategy: 9-6 Doomerang 3 (Yeah, something that amounts to mostly just "spin2win lol" may sound like a poorly-thought out strategy at first, but it limited H&S's options greatly during the fight. Hati couldn't really do anything all the way up until the end, and Skoll went in thinking it could pull a fast one on Doomerang. Which, as we can see, didn't work out all too well for it.) Your winner by 23-22 judge's decision (and also HW RFN champion) is Doomerang 3. Here are the brackets, even though you probably don't need to use them at this point: MW playoff brackets HW playoff brackets ~~Your strategies are to be posted by March 11th.~~ Hooray! The tourney's pretty much finished. I just need to throw up a select few week 5 matches and then this thread can be locked.



Hooray For Lexan	Mar 12 2018, 12:12 AM Post #11
Heavyweight Posts: 558 Group: Global Moderator Member #186 Joined: November 2, 2015	Third Place Playoff Results: Stingray vs. Nuclear Plague XL: Let's get this middleweight third-place playoff bout underway! Stingray, interestingly, is still opting not to use any of its punching bar attachments. Now, it's already lost twice to a similar design to Nuclear Plague XL, but Team Yellow Alert said they had a new strategy to deal with Nuclear Plague's drum. Stingray comes out fast, as is normal for it, but it's not going for the full-on rush, and actually seems to be driving somewhat cautiously. Nuclear Plague has plenty of time to reach full speed, and comes in, trying to go for the side skirts of Stingray, but Stingray whips around and smacks NP with its thwacking tail. Nucplague's wedge deflects the blow, but Stingray bounced off and is able to speed away without getting hit by the drum. It spins around again and drifts to a halt, then speeds back towards its opponent, trying to circle around and... no wait, I think they just spun out, but they almost accidentally got to Nuclear Plague's side. Nuclear Plague turns in time, but the right wheel lifts way up, enough that Stingray could have easily gotten under it. And that has NP worried! The deathhum lowers in pitch as the drum throttles down, and it advances a bit more cautiously. Again, Stingray spins around, and this time catches the back side of NP's wedge corner with the tail. The impact causes Nuclear Plague to pirouette and nearly flip over even with the weapon throttled down. Stingray is actually on top here so far, but they cannot afford to get hit by that drum. They have to take Nuclear Plague to the hazards quickly and disable it, because that robot has proven it does not have the control to keep dancing around a vertical spinner for three minutes. Nuclear Plague is now at full speed again, focusing on keeping the front pointed at Stingray. Stingray carefully squares off, wobbling back and forth as the driver fights to avoid oversteering. Finally, as Nuclear Plague approaches, Stingray gets itself lined up perfectly, and confidently drives forward and... Fires its punching bar. Dead center. Into Nuclear Plague's drum. On purpose. BANG! Stingray goes flying into the air, flipping end over end, and lands upside-down. The immense impact actually causes Nuclear Plague to bounce off the arena floor and faceplant, but the drum is still spinning slowly, and kicks it onto its back. Nuclear Plague is invertible, but it doesn't seem to be able to pull off the gyro self-righting, and ends up just driving itself gently into the wedge wall. Stingray is also supposed to be invertible. Supposed to. Unfortunately its punching bar now looks like that one scene in Harry Potter where Hagrid bends the hell out of Uncle Vernon's shotgun, i.e. the whole thing is now curved and twisted upward, and prevents it from retracting. As a result, the robot is now upside-down balanced on the front end of the punching bar, the thwack tail, and one wheel. One wheel is still turning, but it's not the one touching the ground. The countdown starts! Your winner, by knockout in 1:00, and the Robot Fight Night Middleweight Third Place Finisher, is Nuclear Plague XL! Death Metal vs. Tongue of the Fatman: Let's get this middleweight third-place playoff bout underway! Death Metal gets its bar up to speed, which TotF isn't fast enough to do anything about, and both bots square off somewhere near the middle of the arena. Death Metal tries to veer sideways and take out its opponent's exposed wheels, but Tongue of the Fatman turns and catches the bar on its wedge. The hit pops Death Metal up and bounces it away, but it stays stable, and there's no time for TotF to get a flip in. Death Metal comes back and gets another couple hits, one of which actually smacks the corner of TotF and sends both bots spinning away. Death Metal goes a little bit over the killsaws, but it's just the blade and the hazard operator isn't that stupid. God knows Death Metal's damaged the arena enough already. Anyway, TotF has taken next to no damage from those impacts, just getting scratched a bit. Its front armor is very thick, and its shape is doing a great job deflecting Death Metal. TotF is continuing its slow and steady advance, and possibly getting aggression points for doing so, but the glancing blows aren't slowing DM down enough to give it an opening for a flip. Finally Death Metal comes very close to swinging that huge bar around to the side of Tongue of the Fatman. TotF just manages to spin to protect its wheels, but DM was able to sneak past the heavily armored front. Both bots are sent spinning away, and there's a tooth-shaped hole torn in the side of TotF. But Death Metal sends itself spinning into the wall! One of the last surviving spikes gets bent, and DM's blade is near a stop. TotF races in to capitalize, going for Death Metal's side! Death Metal tries to dodge away from the wall, but TotF pops it up with the wedge and gets the flipper just barely underneath Death Metal's weapon support frame. It flips! BANG! TotF's flipper gets sideswiped by Death Metal's blade as it extends, and the flipper wobbles sideways like a ruler that's been hit by a sledgehammer, but the bending is only elastic, and it still retracts. And that hit has thrown Death Metal off-balance. It hits the floor and ends up gyrodancing on its side, with almost no control. TotF chases after it again, and nearly gets under the rear corner of DM, but Death Metal's wheels touch the ground just in time and its quicker drivetrain gets it out of danger. Again, TotF can't really keep Death Metal from spinning up, but if neither of these bots can seriously damage each other aggression is going to be crucial. Death Metal, now upside-down, seems to know this though, and as soon as it's up to speed it charges in again, aiming for the left side of TotF. TotF turns, and the bar hits dead-center. But now with DM inverted it's a much higher dead-center, high enough to reach over the extra-thick front armor. The robots bounce apart again, and there's a big gash in the flipper at just the right height to take out the left eye and nose of that grotesque face painted on the thing. Death Metal has sensed blood now, and it tears two more gashes in TotF's armor - one in the side panel, and another one in the flipper. Another hit to the flipper and the metal has now been cleaved open over most of its width, but the hit throws Death Metal on its side again, and before it can spin down and regain control, TotF muscles in underneath its wheel and gets another flip! Death Metal goes flying into the air, wobbling from side to side, and comes down hard on its back corner. The bar grazes the corner again, and now Death Metal is only moving in circles. That left wheel has stopped, but look at Tongue of the Fatman! The flipper, weakened by the gashes torn in it, has buckled and twisted downward under it's own force, and doesn't close properly - the arm has gone from curved to hunched! This is still anyone's fight, though. Death Metal is still able to move outside its circumference because the drag of that weapon makes it make wider turns to the right than the left, and it kind of reverses towards TotF. Aggression and damage have been close enough that it's risky for TotF to hang back and hope it's done enough to win the decision, especially if Death Metal shows aggression by limping towards it. Besides, this is the final round, and Mr. AS is no pansy! TotF lumbers towards its opponent, hoping its wedge can hold out long enough to survive! It lines itself up to tee Death Metal off towards the pulverizer, and attacks. Death Metal, now upright again, swings around and delivers another big hit, sending both bots spinning away. Death Metal ends up by the spike strips, and can't get away in time, but it can still turn. And this time, at the slow closing speed, its bar glances off the side of TotF and rides up into the flipper! What a hit! The lower half of Tongue of the Fatman's flipper is torn away completely, and ends up lying underneath the pulverizer on the other side of the arena! The hazard operator helpfully tries to bend it straight again. And Death Metal has launched itself over the killsaws. Sparks fly, but the bot is still functioning! Tongue of the Fatman is now forced to turn its corners towards Death Metal a bit more to avoid getting the lighter armor under its flipper hit. This mostly works out for it, but one blow gashes that under-armor and peels the front corner outward. There's only a minute left now, but TotF finally gets itself under the side of Death Metal, and stops its bar! It can't flip, but it starts slowly but surely pushing the spinner toward the pulverizer! Death Metal's good wheel is on the wedge, trapped by the edges of the recess the flipper would go into. Wait, its tire finally grips the lip and it twists away at the last second! The bar starts to spin again - TotF moves to stop it, but the impact knocks Death Metal into the middle of the arena again. By the time TotF gets out there it's at full speed. TotF circles, looking for a way past the weapon, and it seems to find one - or has it? It goes for the right side of DM, but DM spins all the way around to the left, and hits the side of TotF! The bar glances of the sloped armor and puts Death Metal gyrodancing on its back, but I saw something fly across the arena, and now Tongue of the Fatman is limping in circles as well! Death Metal's bar hits the floor again. It comes to rest inverted, but the weapon has stopped completely now, and the support frame appears to be bent and one or two of the tubes may have separated from the front of the main chassis. After a bit of flopping around, Tongue of the Fatman's left wheel falls off the axle entirely, leaving both bots crippled and weaponless. They manage to bump into each other one more time before time runs out, but can't finish each other off. What an insane battle! Judges' Decision: Damage: Death Metal 10, Tongue of the Fatman 5 Aggression: Death Metal 8, Tongue of the Fatman 7 Strategy: Death Metal 5, Tongue of the Fatman 10 Your winner, by a 23-22 split decision, and the Robot Fight Night Heavyweight Third Place Finisher, is Death Metal!
	"you can give a fuck, just don't give too much of a fuck. there's an optimal level of fuckiness, and if you exceed your fuck quota you'll burn out." - BEES Trihunter on V900's New Undercutter: Spoiler: click to toggle Number 15: Burger King Foot Princess. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is a 15 weapon undercutter, but that might just be what you get. A 4channer uploaded a photo anonymously to the site showcasing his undercutter wedged in Hellhound�s plow. With the statement: "This is the spinners you get on ARC." Admittedly, he had wedgelets on. But that's even worse. The post went live at 6:24 AM on July 6, and a mere 3 minutes later, the tournament organiser in question was alerted to the rogue roboteer. At least, I hope he's rogue. How did it happen? Well, the ARC user hadn't removed the weird-ass wheels from the uploaded photo, which suggested the culprit ate plenty of dicks. This was at 6:27. Three hours later at 9:27, the TO posted with wishes for more writing staff. 5 minutes later, the news station was contacted by another 4channer. And three minutes later, at 9:30, a link was posted: ARC�s online forum. The undercutter photo, otherwise known as exhibit A, was attached. The police contacted the forum in question the next day. When questioned, the admin said "Oh, I know who that is. He's getting kicked out of the tournament." Mystery solved, by 4chan. Now we can all go back to making speed wedges in peace.


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