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| [Kyuuketsuki] Lieutenant Shikodomo; Shinigami/9th division | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Feb 17 2009, 03:08 PM (109 Views) | |
| Kyuuketsuki | Feb 17 2009, 03:08 PM Post #1 |
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General information Name: Shikodomo Name Meaning: Child of Death Date of Birth: February 10, 1800 Age: 509 Visual age: 25 Sex: Female Origin: Unknown Physical Information Visual Appearance: (To be Drawn, by me. Yay.) General Appearance: Long, black hair, so dark that it seems to reflect a vast universe, complete with its own little speckles of light. The hair flows over the supple features of her porcelain face. Brilliant emerald eyes contrast brightly against slender eyebrows and her soft, high cheekbones, along with long, dark eyelashes. Her nose creates a pretty line that lead right to her soft, pale lips. Those lips rest above a slender, rounded chin. Her frame is tall and slender. The porcelain flesh does not reveal any significant muscle build, however there is a barely noticeable tone that her figure takes. For being tall, she is well proportioned and balanced, with pronounced, but not excessive, curves. Her hands are of average size for her height, with delicate fingers that hide a wealth of dexterity. Her feet, similarly so, hint toward her agility and gracefulness. Clothing and Armour: She adorns the typical Shinigami robes, however the edges and sleeves are tattered and torn. A Lieutenant insignia is inked onto a long, white piece of cloth tied neatly around her neck with tapered and ragged tails. This 'semi-scarf' had two others symbols, one stamped on each end. The two kanji are "Shi" (Death) and "Kami" (God). As to why these kanji are present is unknown. Height: 180.34 cm (5'11" - She is tall, no?) Weight: 72.57 kg (130 lbs) Shinigami Information Division: Ninth Rank: Lieutenant Zanpakuto Name: Shinoyuki (Death's Snow) Spirit Appearance/Personality/Inner World: A world of endless snow. Falling flakes fluctuate between gentle flurries and restless blizzards. In the endless land of snow, at the center, lays a black shadow. This shadow seems to draw in the snow into a void. At the middle of the void, that which generates it sits. This 'being' was clad in darkness that seemed to be its own flesh. Red eyes glowed from the whites that seemed to be placed neatly in that endless nothing, framed by brilliant white hair. Any part of its figure that enters visible sight reveals it to be a slender, masculine being. Zanpakuto Appearance: In it's unreleased form, Shinoyuki resembles any other Zanpakuto, save for its length, which is longer than average, and its color, black as Shikodomo's hair. Release Phrase: Cold as Death's Embrace, Shinoyuki. Release Method: She spins with the tethers of her uniform and long neck-sash about her. The Zanpakuto separates into two sets of hand claws. Shikai Appearance: Her Shikai is two sets of hand claws, four per hand, and black as her hair. Shikai Abilities: Dark Haze: ---The blades of Shinoyuki will begin to darken with a hint of black. The blades will have been endowed with an effect that causes the opponent to become disoriented. The blades, upon making contact with the flesh, cause ethereal energy to interrupt the normal flow of chi in a being. The imbalance causes the opponent to lose their senses. This can result with hazy vision, dizziness, loss of balance, and, if enough hits are made in rapid succession, the opponent may become temporarily blinded or deafened for the remainder of the battle. Loss of consciousness or 'Black Out' occurs as an ultimate result if enough hits are landed. The nature of the attack does not necessarily cause 'death,' but it does allow for any being to be affected by it. Blood Freeze: ---A mist will rise off of Shikodomo's hand claws along with a light layer of frost that will form on each blade. The blades will have been endowed with a freezing cold that, once making contact with the soft flesh and blood of a body, will instantly cause the blood that touches them to freeze. This blood, momentarily being frozen, will continue to hurt the opponent by creating tears in the tissue until it thaws again. Tissue damage depends on the proximity of the blood to the surface, or inversely the depth, of the body, as well as where on the body the strikes hit. So, a slash on the arm will not cause as much damage as impaling the opponent in the chest. Bankai Name: Unknown Release Method: N/A Bankai Appearance: N/A Bankai Abilities: N/A Known Kidou: Knows both Hado and Bakudo up to 50 without incantation. Also knows Shunpo. Other information Fighting Level: Master Fighting Style: Don't mistake her slender form for weakness. She is quite agile and fast, even without Shunpo. She fights similarly to the manner of a Kunoichi. She utilizes speed, accuracy, and precision with her strikes. In hand-to-hand combat, her goal is to wear the opponent down with lightning-like blows and her quick footwork. She is capable of dodging most normal strikes while unarmed, however, she is trained to parry open and closed hand attacks in order to trip up the opponent. When fighting with her unreleased Zanpakuto, she utilizes a keen sense of balance to compensate for the lack of strength when wielding a larger blade. Instead of sheer muscle power, she uses gravity and leverage in order to swing her blade at devistating and deadly speed. The force of her blows are a result of built up momentum. Greater momentum equals greater force. In it's Shikai form, she uses Shinoyuki like a pair of ninja claws. Her parrying ability is further increased during her shikai state, and she is capable of using her ability to balance and utilize leverage to use her opponent's weight against them. Her speed is also increased, because her weapon isn't as large, allowing for more hits at a higher speed. Items: Poison Riceballs (Tenchu anyone?) Personality: Personality? What's that? She doesn't really say anything, and when, if, she does, it's very little and to the point. That or it's very vague. She is a distant being, whether inside or outside of battle. It's not really clear if she realizes the difference between reality and fantasy. This can be devistating when she fights opponents, because she doesn't often realize that she's being injured. History: ---The only real correlation between Shikodomo's birth and anything else is that she was born during the Edo Period of Japan. As to where she was born, remains unknown. Born during the human year of 1800, it has been noted that, out of most of the mysteries about her, she has been rumoured to have visited the earth plane multiple times. Suggestions indicate that she had been training in the arts of stealth and shadows for several centuries before her time in the soul society. ---Wandering for hundreds of years after being sent to 'learn about the world,' the origin of her family is unknown. It is known that she was never 'alive' to begin with, at least she was never 'human.' She was born as the same kind of being that Shinigami are. She carries herself in a very formal manner and practices near perfect etiquette. There are even rumours that she is of royal blood. ---Shikodomo arrived in soul society approximately 200 years ago. Previous whereabouts during the 300 years prior are unknown. It seems like she just appeared there one day. Some say she was sent there by order of the Royalty of Shinigami. It has been rumoured that she may even be related to the King of Shinigami himself. Her rise through the ranks was not unreasonable due to her training prior to entering soul society. Her skill against hollows even suggests that she had dealt with them in her past. She was a fighting master even before she joined the Ninth Squad, but she was never so ambitious as to use it to advance herself quickly. Silent, save for when giving or receiving orders, it would seem the distance between herself and others may have been caused by her isolation from other beings during her life prior to joining the Shinigami. Other Notes: When it comes to Sashimi, she is like a black cat. Silent and efficient. You'll only have your riceballs left. Sample RP: ---The light plodding of footsteps hearkened to several female Shinigami walking along a wooden floor in their tabi. Their intent unknown, their destination unknown, their actions suggested that they were currently not on duty. They were gossiping just like schoolgirls. The content of the gossip was arbitrary, as gossiping never has any meaning. They came upon a hall that intersected their own. ---Suddenly, without their noticing, a figure entered from that intersecting hall. The first female nearly bumped into the figure before she realized almost as soon as she jumped backward, "Oh my god!" ---Emerald eyes turned to look at them from a porcelain visage. A tall, yet young woman looked without emotion at the group. Long, black hair flowed down her back, and long locks framed her porcelain face. Her gaze mesmerized them for a moment. ---They looked away for an instant, and when they looked back, the young woman was gone. Looking at each other, one commented, "Wow... how creepy.." Another said, "Who was she?" A third said, "I heard she was the lieutenant of ninth squad..." Edited by Kyuuketsuki, Feb 17 2009, 09:03 PM.
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| weehay | Feb 17 2009, 07:23 PM Post #2 |
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First things first you have to properly explain the Shikai abilities and you can take out all that '(Imagine Vampirism, Damage = contact/time)' stuff it's not needed. We need to know what exactly the character has to do when using her shikai abilities and what exactly they do. The life draining one I'd rather you replace that with another ability as that's too overpowered. We can't have Shikai abilities just being explained like the example below Deaths lovable blast - fires red blast That isn't good enough we need it more detailed, look at the example below
That is an example of what you have to do when describing the abilities of your character. It's best to give as much detail as possible so we have a clear image of what happens. |
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Characters Bleach Dark Revenant Kyoraku Shunsui "Even if i wish for these peaceful days to last forever, it's still only a simply wish. Peace never lasts, eventually conflict will be born again, that is the undeniable truth" Syao Byako Shogo Kiriyama "You listenin' you cowardly prick, you don't come out here right fuckin' now and I'll crush this little bastards head. You take too long in comin' out and I'll crush the little bastards head and piss on it's corpse, you got ten seconds" Divisions ![]() ![]() | |
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| Kyuuketsuki | Feb 17 2009, 07:57 PM Post #3 |
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Please give it a second look, now. I adjusted the Shikai. Hopefully more in your favour. |
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| weehay | Feb 17 2009, 08:14 PM Post #4 |
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I'd rather you change the draining life to something else, you don't have to change the entire ability. Just change the life draining part of it and make it disorient the opponent with each hit making them more disoriented or something along those lines. To be honest draining life is somewhat overpowered even if it is on a slow process but you'll find that in an RP like this an ability like that is useless, since you can't kill a character without the permission of the player such an ability will be useless most of the time. If you change it to something like disorienting the opponent little by little with each hit it'll be much more useful to your character. |
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Characters Bleach Dark Revenant Kyoraku Shunsui "Even if i wish for these peaceful days to last forever, it's still only a simply wish. Peace never lasts, eventually conflict will be born again, that is the undeniable truth" Syao Byako Shogo Kiriyama "You listenin' you cowardly prick, you don't come out here right fuckin' now and I'll crush this little bastards head. You take too long in comin' out and I'll crush the little bastards head and piss on it's corpse, you got ten seconds" Divisions ![]() ![]() | |
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| Kyuuketsuki | Feb 17 2009, 09:05 PM Post #5 |
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I have removed it. I took your idea for disorientation. I hope it suits you. Thank you. |
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| Beriadan | Feb 18 2009, 02:11 AM Post #6 |
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Vengance Never Dies
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Looks good... you're more skilful than your Captain ._.;; But whatever, don't overpower this character too much. Approved. |
Heroic Genesis![]() ![]() ![]() | |
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| ElCisne | Feb 18 2009, 10:01 AM Post #7 |
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If any captain would have a lieutenant that was more skillful than them, Kogashi would be the one to have it. |
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Dark Reverent: Knud Larsen The complacent insomniac with sword-chucks Shirou Kuchiki A fourth son four times over Thalmond Burson Man on a quest to preserve what remains of sword fighting in the real world. Dawn to Dusk: Isamu Ishimaru The 8th squad Captain... Of the future! Sosimo Cruelty and Caution (or cowardliness) Tauno Ikavälko Some good natured kid that can freeze some stuff I work on the weekends. Fleshing out back stories is too much like work | |
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| Geoblood | Feb 18 2009, 10:19 AM Post #8 |
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unfortunately its true he would thats why he is stepping down |
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Spoiler: click to toggle
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| Kogashi | Feb 18 2009, 10:48 AM Post #9 |
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It's amazing how well it works ^^; |
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Characters Spoiler: click to toggle
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